Shallow Minds, Deep Thoughts

Release

2012-01-24T06:00:00.000-08:00

I have been thinking about this week's message at my usual thinking time - 6:00 am during my daily rendezvous with the elliptical. Yesterday I skipped my regular meeting with that instrument of torture because of a huge knot in my left hamstring. I made all kinds of excuses for skipping out on that part of my routine, but way deep down inside was that little voice that says, "Loser. You're weak. If you weren't you would have pushed through the pain. You will never succeed." That voice has been with me for as long as I can remember, and I wager that if we were all completely honest, each one of us has that voice with us. And it doesn't just criticize me for what I am doing now. When I least expect it, that voice reminds of things in my past. I'm even getting a little nervous just writing this, wondering what is going to spring up to bite me today.

Here is another way to look at it. I was having a conversation with a brilliant friend who said those memories and experiences - all the things we were encouraged to remember in last week's sermon - are like beach balls in a swimming pool. They are always there, they are always with you. They can get in your way, but you can move them around, "shepherd" them. They can fluster and frustrate you, but if you try to get rid of them by pushing them under the water they will fly up and become a bigger problem.

I don't know about you, but I think I allow that voice to get to me and hang on to the problems of the past out of fear. Fear of failure, fear of the future, fear of judgement and condemnation, fear the unknown. I say things to myself that I would never, in a hundred, million, gazillion years say to a friend. I know that to some extent that keeps me locked in the past. If we aren't able to release the past and the fear, then they will jump up and block our path, prevent us from seeing the signs, prevent us from being able to move forward, in the direction we are being led.

And then in the midst of trying to corral my beach balls and bring some semblance of coherency to my thoughts I stumbled on a passage from a book that I have been trying to read for five weeks. (I wonder why it took until yesterday for me to make any progress?) Paulo Coelho, in The Aleph, says it far better than I ever could:

"...I realized that forgiveness works only if you accept it... There is a moment in the Bible, during the Last Supper, when Jesus predicts that one of his disciples will deny him and one will betray him. He considers both crimes to be equally grave. Judas betrays him, and, eaten away by guilt, hangs himself. Peter denies him not just once but three times. He had time to think about what he was doing, but he persisted in his error. However, instead of punishing himself for this, he makes a strength of his weakness and becomes the first great preacher of the message taught to him by the man whom he had denied in his hours of need.

The message of love was greater than the sin. Judas failed to understand this, but Peter used it as a working tool."

Peter released his fear, doubt, and guilt. He accepted Christ's forgiveness and love. But he didn't forget.

Remember

2012-01-19T19:58:00.000-08:00

We started a new three-sermon-series this week, the first installment is about starting anew, in the new year, and remembering. I was really glad it was about remembering, and not just the whole new-year-new-start propaganda that assaults us from every media outlet at this time of the year. I have a problem with that kind of thinking. Some people would argue that anything that stimulates a new, better, healthier behavior is good. It seems to me that if you can magically erase all of your past behavior (read: failures) then you can't really claim your success going forward. If you aren't responsible for what you did, how can you be responsible for what you are going to do?

We encourage children to remember stories from their childhood and babyhood, events they can't possibly remember. We tell and retell family stories. As people of faith we remember the stories of faith, the grace, the gift of God who knows everything about us. But it is not just remembering the past that defines us. George Santayana said, "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." If we want to avoid that trap, we must also actively claim our histories.

But where does this take us with God? I know that I am perpetually in need of a new-year-new-start. Truthfully, several times a day would be nice. And I in this case I would also really like it if that new start could erase my mistakes, even the ones that no one else knows about. It is really uncomfortable to look at and remember mistakes, even though I know that without that introspection I can't learn the lesson. But what about the judgement? The condemnation?

Remembering, not looking back, will help us move forward. Claiming our past, mistakes and all, will allow us to grow, move forward. I really want to believe that owning those memories will be like the experience described by people who have had near-death experiences. They almost always describe an overwhelming sense of love and acceptance in the form of a light, and having a life review in that warmth and caring of that light. It is just so difficult to let go of the fear... of judgement. And the purpose of that review? To help us see where we we have been and where we are being led. The trick is to then be strong enough to pay attention to the signs... and follow them.

Does It Matter?

2012-01-14T06:36:00.000-08:00

John was preaching a universal baptism of repentance and forgiveness. Cleansing of the soul by cleansing the body in a dirty river. I think we all understand why we need that dip in the river. (I could use that help four or five times a day.) But why was it necessary for Jesus to be baptized by John?

There have been many answers suggested for that question. The one I liked best was to please his mother. Others include transforming himself from fully human to fully divine, identifying himself fully and completely with sinful humanity, foreshadowing his acceptance of death, reenenacting Israel crossing the Jordan into the Promised Land, instituting a sacrament as He did with Communuion and the Last Supper, and finally as a beginning - to mark the close of his "childhood" and the beginning of a wandering ministry.

Looking at all those reasons put me into brain lock. So many different perspectives, reasons, sources, outcomes. I can see validity in each of the explanations I have found so far. Contemplating and considering each has given a deeper and more defined understanding of my own faith and beliefs. Life is messy, dirty, just like the desert and the river, but God was there and is here.

Then MY question popped up in the mdist of pondering. Does it matter? What difference does it make to my faith and actions to understand why Jesus was baptized? The bottom line is that God is there when things are pretty and nice and going the way I want, and God is there when things are messy, disappointing, overwhelming and seem disastrous. The challenge is to remember and accept that. I thought of it like the time when we were at our wits end and a friend brought dinner for us. Did I really need to know what the friend's motivation was, or was it simply enough to accept the gift and be grateful?

Short and Sweet

2012-01-03T05:59:00.001-08:00

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year, and wishing you health and prosperity.

Presence or Presents?

2011-12-21T10:02:00.000-08:00

This past week was the Christmas Cantata at Salem. You know, for a small church we have big talent. Props to Bob M. for all his hard work and planning. But no sermon this week leaves me with no topic. As I write this I should be shopping, or baking, or wrapping, or something. Who has time the week before Christmas to sit and write? Well, OK, a writer does. But that group doesn't include me. So why am I spending my time on the computer?

I did something else completely indulgent this week. I started reading a new book - Aleph by Paulo Coehlo. In just the first few pages he struck a chord with this paragraph:

"In magic-and in life-there is only the present moment, the now. You can't measure time the way you measure the distance between two points. "Time" doesn't pass. We human beings have enormous difficulty in focusing on the present; we're always thinking about what we did, about how we could have done it better, about the consequences of our actions, and about why we didn't act as we should have. Or else we think about the future, about what we're going to do tomorrow, what precautions we should take, what dangers await us around the next corner, how to avoid what we don't want and how to get what we have always dreamed of."

It seems to me that was part of George's problem. He was always thinking about his lost plans, or the dark future, evaluating his level of success. He frequently missed the good that was right there in front of him. When he hit a crisis he had nothing to sustain him and get him through, his coping tank was empty. Clarence helped him refocus on all the good that he had, right there, in that very moment. He found his joy.

Just how does this tie in to Christmas, besides the busy part? Throughout all the stories of Jesus and the disciples it seems Jesus was supremely present in the moment of their experiences, while the disciples were worried about something else - food, shelter, storm, impending arrest. I don't really see their worries as irrelative, in fact, I understand them pretty well. But, while the past informs the present and shapes the future, all we really have is right here, right now. The people, the humans, in the Christmas story were able to see that and live it out. Mary accepted the angel's proclamation so easily, Joseph trusted that taking Mary as his wife in her "condition" was the right thing to do, the shepherds left their flocks, the wise men traveled. They were all present, in the moment.

I confess, I am a bit of a Negative Nelly - just ask my family. Living in the here and now doesn't come easily to us (me). I'm not quite sure if it is the human condition or part of our cultural obsessions. The most probable answer is that it is some combination of factors, and I want to attribute that inability to something other than a character flaw. So, I am attempting - operative word attempting - to be present. That's why I am reading, writing, baking, visiting, and not really thinking about what I am going to do tomorrow. OK, I am thinking about it, but really trying to follow the example and be present in the moment. The jury is still out on how I'm doing, but I think it is a valuable exercise. If only Clarence could come help me get focused.

A Clarence Point of View

2011-12-14T14:47:00.000-08:00

Here it is, Wednesday, and I am still trying to get words on the screen. I am really struggling with the messages lately and could use someone to help me discuss and process. There is so much competing for my attention right now. Do you feel it too? It doesn't take being in the midst of a crisis like George was with the bank to feel overwhelmed, despondent, lost, helpless and hopeless. If only there were some definitive, finite, subjective way to get it all under control. If I do this, this and this, then everything will be just fine.

That is what was happening in the scripture this week - Phillipians 3:7-14. Paul is talking to the Gentiles in Phillipi who are listening to teachers telling them that if they follow the Jewish law they will get to "be holy" - the focus is on the law . They have lost their perspective. Sure, the laws give them the comfort of concrete steps they can take as the means to a finite end - knowing Christ and God. Paul tells them (and us) clearly that it is a process not a product, a journey not a destination. He even admits that he is not there, but is pressing on towards his goal - having a righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith and knowing Christ.

The pastor used a brilliant illustration for the children's story this week. She tried to take a picture of the children, but had the camera pointed the wrong way. Of course the kids caught it and tried to stop her, but they couldn't. It was easy for them (and the adults) to get the point - she was focused on herself and not others. George Bailey allowed the needs of others to shape his life - staying at the savings and loan when his father died, giving away his honeymoon cash during a bank run, lending to neighbors who were probably bad risks financially but good people. He focuses on making the best success of the savings and loan that he can, and that is how he defines himself. When the deposit is lost and the business is failing, George can see no value in anything he has done. He feels himself a failure with no way out.

When Clarence jumps into the river, he changes George's focus. He immediately goes back to shaping his goals and actions by the needs of others, saving Clarence. God comes to George through Clarence, kind of a "burning bush" moment. When he sees how the town looks without his influence, George realizes that it is not the things he has done, but the people with whom he has been in relationship, and the way he has conducted himself in those relationships that really matters.

All those things competing for my attention, how do I put them aside and get to know Christ, get to holy? The first step is to remember that God comes to each one of us in small ways, every day. We simply need to be open and recognize him. God reached out to Paul and the Phillipians through Jesus, and to George through Clarence, and while we probably aren't going to get a burning bush or Clarence moment, God also reaches out to us first every day. We simply need to accept the invitation and live in relationship. And know that no matter what, you matter.

It's A Wonderful Life!

2011-12-07T12:30:00.000-08:00

Do you have expectations of what your life will be? If I work hard, do the right thing, care for my family and others, make healthy choices, then I will have a long, happy, prosperous life. Right? In the movie, "It's A Wonderful Life," George Bailey had expectations for his life. He was going to go off, see the world, do something important with his life. He never really defined what "important" was, but it is understood to be something that cannot be accomplished where he is, in a small town filled with small lives.

As most of us know, life isn't always what we expect it to be. There are bumps, boulders and sometimes mountains to be overcome. Getting over and around the obstacles can set us on a different path than the one we expected. And it is difficult to give up expectations that we have nurtured and cultivated over time. Some of mine have been with me longer than I can remember, they have become an integral part of my mindset and processing.
When Clarence comes to him, George is at a place where nothing has gone as he expected it to go, and he feels utterly lost. We can get mired in that kind of thinking, too. Where is the project that was going to transform lives, make me rich, famous, useful, worthwhile? If I can't accomplish that big, extravagant, "important" thing, then what use is my life? George is so lucky! Clarence helps George define his life affirmatively by allowing him to see what it is not. George's eyes were closed to just how wonderful his life was by the curtain of his expectations. I guess there is nothing wrong with dreams and expectations, unless we allow them to blind us to reality.
Does that apply to our expectations for God as well. If we have big, important expectations of God do they keep us from seeing God in the many small ways he comes to us every day? Think about the Jews as they waited for the Messiah to come based on this prophecy:
Isaiah 9:6-7 New International Version (NIV)

6 For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
7 Of the greatness of his government and peace
there will be no end.
He will reign on David’s throne
and over his kingdom,
establishing and upholding it
with justice and righteousness
from that time on and forever.
The zeal of the LORD Almighty
will accomplish this.

I don't know about you, but if I heard those words I would NOT be expecting a baby. Or a man who would willingly, peacefully sacrifice his life. And whenever I see the word zeal, well, I just hold on because I know that means it is going to be quite a ride! So how many people in his day missed Jesus because he just didn't fit their expectation?

The sermons the last two weeks left me with some questions. Like George, I could use some help in defining who the Messiah is that I am expecting. How did and does Christ fulfill that promise? And what exactly does a wonderful life look like? Paul gives us one answer to that last question in Philippians 2:3-4

"3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others."

Maybe imitating the humility of Christ keeps us focused on the "smaller" things, so we can see the forest for the trees. Service to others does make a difference. I keep working on it, but right about now I could use my own personal Clarence.

The Third One's The Charm

2011-12-06T10:30:00.000-08:00

Wow! Sorry so late, thought I had finished this one. Way back on November 20 we listened to the final in the three sermon series on Matthew 25, preparing and waiting for the coming of Christ. Whether it be the celebration of the coming of the baby, or the second coming, we have been considering how we wait, how we prepare ourselves.

So far in this series I have learned we are responsible for preparing ourselves. No one can do it for us. And we must act, do, use what we have been given. We are to create communities that reflect and project the love of God in to the world. Today we considered how we do that - our attitude toward servitude, having a servant's heart, seriously looking at who or what we serve.

I think a recap will get that done, help reflect on and process some unspoken yet understood messages. First, all people are by nature equally undeserving. There is plenty of scriptural basis for this statement, but it seems to me that in this God-helps-those-who-help-themselves materialistic culture, we (I) often fall into the trap of believing that because I help those less fortunate, because I share, because I support my community of faith, because I do other things I somehow merit special consideration. False. None of us is any more deserving than the other. What makes the difference is not what we do, but what we believe - in God.

Second, because God favors someone else, it does not diminish me, because neither one of us deserved anything to begin with. This one goes back to the parable of the vineyard owner and the workers. I also see this principle in the parable of the talents. There was no jealousy between the workers because of the differing amounts they were given. God gives according to need and ability, and expects us to use what we have been given.

Finally, we choose. God has chosen to offer eternal life, to do right, to give us what we need and can handle. Our actions - and inaction - have consequences. We can be goats or we can be sheep. We can choose to be saved through Jesus, demonstrating by our actions that we understand what we are called to do and who we are called to be. We choose how to invest our lives, but if we choose badly God does not and based on Matthew 25:31-46 will not save us from our bad choices.

Ephesians 2:10 New International Version (NIV)

¹⁰ For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

Time for this goat to get do-ing.

Good and Faithful, or Wicked and Lazy?

2011-11-17T11:10:00.001-08:00

This week was the second of three sermons looking at Matthew and the topic of preparing to wait. Another one of my least favorites, the Parable of the Talents. Ugh. Another parable that goes against everything I learned.

I have been thinking long and hard about the difference between the three servants. Why did the first two decided to invest the money, while the third one hid it? Since there is no comment about their individual abilities, I have to assume their circumstances were similar. Although he sees them as having different levels of ability, the master trusts all three equally. They begin the "challenge" on even footing.

The difference is not in how the master sees them, but in how they see the master. The first two servants do not appear to fear the master. They took what they had been given and acted. The third not only lacked the faith and confidence to attempt to act, he was paralyzed by his fear. At this point I want to start making excuses for him (me), but I know it won't do any good. The third servant not only let fear prevent him from acting, it prevented him from having any kind of relationship with his master.

That really hit home for me. Having been raised in a hell-fire-brimstone church, I was sure that God was always ready to punish, and I would never be "good enough." It has been a struggle to work through that and find a loving God. It's like the struggle to see setbacks and obstacles in life as opportunities. I know from personal experience that how you see God shapes your relationship with God and also your actions (or inaction). I do understand why the third servant hid the talent.

But, at the end of the day the message I'm getting in this study is that we are expected to use what has been given to us to further the work of God. The kingdom is here, and not yet. We must work to create communities that reflect and allow a peek at the kingdom yet to come. When we use what we have been given - creating communities of love, justice, compassion, welcome, peace - we demonstrate our faith in a loving and just God in unmistakeable actions. Guess I had better get busy... After all, I need to be responsible for getting myself ready, while I'm waiting.

Preparing For... What?

2011-11-06T17:46:00.000-08:00

Friday I was preparing for a road trip and desperately wanted to download a new song for the ride. It is a new, jazz version of a Javier Mendoza song I already have. Despite my best efforts and persistence, I was not able to download the file and had to make the trip without it. I was really looking forward to the music distracting me from my current worries, worries that I have been allowing to dominate my thoughts. Frustrating.

I was finally able to download and listen to the song this morning. I love the tune and the new arrangement is so cool. The words are authentic, a bit seedy, but the underlying message is about being careful to not value temporal, transient, material things. While I was listening I had a thought to do a Facebook search for someone I knew a long time ago. I thought I found him, but as a board member of a non-profit based in Washington state. A little confusing since he lives in Bolivia.

Of course I had to read up on the non-profit, and discovered it was in memory and honor of a young girl who died in a tragic accident while living in South America as an exchange student. Since she lived in the same town I had lived in, and was basically on a trip very similar to one I had taken, it really struck home with me. I felt like there was a message coming through for me, but it wasn't quite clear.

All I needed was a little clarification, and wouldn't you know it, the message in service provided that. The upcoming sermons will be looking at how we wait and prepare for the coming of Christ, and how and where God comes to us. First up - the parable of the ten bridesmaids. Remember? They were told to be ready for the bridegroom but didn't know when he would arrive. When he did arrive, the five wise bridesmaids had enough oil for their lamps and were prepared, but the other five - the foolish ones - had to go out and get more oil. While they were out buying oil they missed out on the wedding feast.

One of the most troubling aspects of this parable for me has always been that the five wise bridesmaids did not share with the others. Even when they asked. In the back of my mind my German-Anlgo-Saxon-pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps-charity-begins-at-home upbringing was satisfied with the story. After all, they each got what they deserved, right? But what about loving others as yourself? Wouldn't that require sharing with those who didn't have enough? The wise bridesmaids were welcomed to the feast, legitimizing their failure to share. I find it uncomfortable to consider that there are negative consequences for our actions (or failures to act), even though cognitively I know there are always consequences.

The pastor offered an explanation that I have not considered. The bridesmaids had to prepare themselves. Those who had oil could not prepare, or save, those who ran out of oil. They had to be responsible for their own actions, their own soul, be ready, because you never know when or where God will speak to you. Hearing the word, then acting, doing - this prepares you so that you can recognize the presence of God in your life.

Thwack. The 2x4 hit home, up side of my head. But I think I got the message. Be ready, take care of preparing yourself and your spirit. Be ready and open to the many different ways God is acting in your life. Be ready to recognize God in whatever way he shows up. As I listened to that song this morning I realized that I have been preparing for sorrow, loss, failure. But this mother who lost her child is preparing for hope, joy, service. What an example! I am taking steps to change that, and one of them is to strongly encourage you to read Etta's story at http://ettaprojects.org/, and then act as you are moved to act.

Generosity Game Plan

2011-10-26T08:49:00.000-07:00

It is football season, and I confess that while I enjoy watching the games I know enough to know that I don't know enough. For instance, I know almost nothing about the game plan. I wondered what kind of process the coaches go through and found this very brief, incomplete but somewhat comprehensible summary.

Like anything else you start out with a goal - winning. A head coach has a playbook with about 1,000 plays in it, plays he has developed and accumulated. At the beginning of the season the coaching staff will go through a critical self-analysis of the previous season - what worked well, what didn't work, and what and how they need to change. They will further refine and whittle down the number of plays they use based on their personnel and their strengths. Then comes the teaching, the practicing, everybody on the same page, working together toward that common goal. They will further refine and reduce the number of plays they use based on the player-leaders' preferences, strengths and insights. And finally, they will choose plays for each game based on their opponent's strengths and weaknesses, and go through a similar process of adjustment throughout each game.

I don't know about you, but I have similar plans and processes in place for parts of my life. (I know, control freak.) Especially for projects, getting things done around the house, getting the kids through college. I think we all plan, and pretty carefully sometimes, for the things that are important to us, that we value, even if we don't consciously name them. I am going to be painfully honest here and admit that I never really thought about being intentional about faith and church and giving. It really is a lot more comfortable to just kind of let it happen, what will be will be, and besides, God is in charge of it all so it will be just fine, right? I'm supposed to give up control to God.

Wow! Look at how easy it is to talk myself into something. OK, so I admit, as an individual I have a long way to go. I think I would be willing to start down the path if I had encouragement, didn't feel like I would be judged, was in a community that values progress not perfection. What do you think? I've been digesting the last four weeks of study, trying to summarize for myself as much as for the blog. I'll spout off here and let you comment and continue the discussion:

As a faith community we need to have a game plan. Our goal? Giving our best in order to change lives and make disciples. Our play book includes scripture, but it also includes naming our faith values, being intentional about what beliefs and values shape our plans and actions. We can whittle and refine what plays we use based on what we have done in the past, what worked, what no longer works, how to change. Teaching and practicing includes discussion, missions, programs and the tithe, focusing on the giver's need to give and valuing progress. Once we get into the game we need to continuously look at the personnel available to us, our strengths, evaluating everything we do and then be prepared to tweak or eliminate those things that are not getting us to our goal.

Of course that is a lot quicker and easier than reality. One of the most difficult things to get over is the great faith that is required for extravagant generosity. With a football game plan you have immediate feedback. You either won or you didn't. Giving, tithing, ministries, and missions require us to plant the seeds of fruit that we may never see. In our consumerist, goal-driven, results-based society where value, self-definition, and self-worth rest on material possessions and measurable things, extravagant generosity is often regarded as foolishness. Can thoughtful, planned, designed, calculated intentional giving free us to delight in giving from what comes first, to live in a sense of gratitude? It can't hurt.

What Do You See?

2011-10-16T20:59:00.000-07:00

We were asked this week to imagine what are our hopes and visions for our church. It required thinking about where we are right now and then envisioning a future that is realistic but also idealistic. Community, ministries, outreach, education... I can see them all. I have an idea of what I would like to see, and I am sure that there are as many visions as there are members of our church.

That got me thinking, what are our hopes and visions for ourselves? Whether conscious or subconscious, we all have a mental (ideal) self-image of ourselves, both physical and spiritual. Think about it. What do you look like in your mind's eye? What do you want to look like? For all of my life I have battled my weight. Even at my heaviest I saw myself as a tall, willowy beautifully coordinated floating being, graceful and flowing. And of course she is as gentle and generous as Snow White or Cinderella, everyone and everything good and kind love her. I could see that watercolor being even if I couldn't make her completely real.

The reality was a bit different. I was wider than I am tall, frumpy, clumsy, and heavy-footed thanks to bad knees. A clomping schlub. I have been working really hard to change that, changing habits, exercising, eating better. As for disposition, in reality I am closer to a compulsive, critical, perfectionist with control issues, not the loving, generous sprite. But I know that if I visualize that other me, and work hard, I can become more like the luminous being I know is inside me.

Is that why we give? What do we get from giving? I wonder what possessed the widow to give all she had (Luke 21:1-4), why did Zacchaeus make such a radical change, what was the Good Samaritan thinking when he cared for the stranger? Could it be that they had a self-image that transcended reality, and in giving they were able to become that person? Generosity allowed them to achieve God's purpose in them - to become doers of the Word, not just hearers? Giving (tithing) is not just what God wants us to do, it is about who God wants us to become. God has a bigger, better vision for us than we do for ourselves. In order to achieve that vision we have to practice and work hard. We have to choose to be grateful, generous, content, believe that our needs will be provided in order to suppress and resist our all too human tendency to be anxious, fearful, driven by a need to possess.

Giving doesn't give us a golden ticket. Holding on to things will only prevent us from growing in our relationship with God. Practicing generosity, really practicing because none of us is perfect, will help us enjoy giving, let us glimpse God's vision for us and the world, maybe incarnate God for each other, and allow us to become who we were made to be.

Who (What) Do You Love?

2011-10-12T07:00:00.000-07:00

When talking about money, it is easy to see what an organization or an individual values. Take a look at their budget. I have yet to participate in a budgeting process that, if examined closely, doesn't reveal firm statements about what it's author holds important. There are some mandatory expenses, you have to pay the utilities, right? But if you look at the different line items you can figure out where the discretionary spending choices had to be made, and the results reveal what is valued. For instance, as my knees get more arthritic, I value really good, supportive shoes. That is in my budget. I am also very attached to my image as a mom, it is scary to think about changing that after XX years. So in order to hang on to that I budget for repairs to the mini van that is fading almost as fast as my memory. As the Bishop says, "Every time we spend money, we make a statement about what we value."

I am still working through my financial budget to see what I value. Sounds crazy, doesn't it? Subconsciously, belief systems shape our decisions, but what happens if we are intentional about uncovering and understanding those beliefs and values? It can be a bit uncomfortable. Of course, budgeting and money go back to the last discussion. They are black and white, cut and dried, objective and measurable. Easy to identify, and then (maybe) change if needed. I worry that focusing only, or mostly, on money has the potential to lead us back to mechanical stewardship.

I am more intrigued by what our actions say about what we value. Or who. Our study of extravagant generosity isn't just about money. For me, it is coming down to how what I do and believe shapes what I give. I think that was a part of the first week's discussion, but sometimes I can be a little slow to get on board. Looking at the examples in the book, the fiddler who was transformed worked tirelessly to improve his music when he realized his life was worth claiming for the effect he could have by using his gift of music. The custodian gave to the homeless person without strings because of what the gift did for him, knowing he could answer for what he had done. The ministries and churches we have come from the generosity of those who went before us. Like the whitewater rafters, they intentionally "paddled" their gifts so they would go in the direction of the things and people they valued. I wonder, which came first - the desire to give or the giving? Does it matter?

Practicing Generosity

2011-10-03T05:18:00.000-07:00

If you would like to follow along with us, for the next few weeks we will be reading the book "Practicing Extravagant Generosity" by Robert Schnase. We began the series this past Sunday, but each week will stand alone, so join us for one or all.

Some of the discussion this first week centered around the definition of the terms and understanding how the phrase extravagant generosity relates to stewardship and giving. Merriam Webster online defines the words individually in this way:

Extravagant=exceeding the limits of reason or necessity
Generosity=marked by abundance or ample proportions

Most of the discussion really focused in on the differences between the terms stewardship and generosity. In both cases, though, the consensus was that we don't really talk about giving.

I confess I had trouble getting into that discussion. My mind wandered off, as it often does, and i got stuck wondering why we don't talk about giving? I believe part of the reason is that our tradition has been one of stewardship. Stewardship is concrete, mechanical, observable, measurable... objective. Any objective can be impartially measured. Either you are or you are not giving. Either you are or you are not tithing. Black and white, cut and dried, measured and judged.

Ouch. Who wants to talk about something when the likelihood is that either you or others will judge you a failure? Even if the only other person who knows you aren't tithing is the financial secretary, well, the two of you know you are a failure. Right? Scripture tells us to tithe. It's measurable, laid out as the first ten percent.

One of the things I value most about being a Methodist is the emphasis on a personal relationship with God. Our beliefs force you to figure out what faith and discipleship mean for you. There is a quote that has been attributed to John Wesley that, for me, summarizes Methodism: "In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity." If we are in firm agreement and unison on the essentials, there is room for personal interpretation on the non-essentials. And there must be charity in determining what is essential and what is non-essential.

So, here is my non-essential. Scripture also tells us that we give not because the church needs the money (although it has been my experience that there was a lot of that in scripture, too), but because of what it says about our relationship with God. I always remember the widow who gave her last coin, the parable of the servants and the talents, the disciples leaving behind not just their possessions, but their families too, the prodigal son. These are about a strong faith and spirit of generosity to which I only aspire. These are about extravagant generosity. And it is a topic I think is easier to discuss, too. There really is room to be proportional, to consider what and why you give instead of being locked in to the success-failure measures.

Before I close this week, I want to be very clear that these are the ramblings and interpretations of one person. I know only enough to know that I don't know enough. The best I can do is articulate questions and offer personal observations and thoughts. I can't quote scripture, I can't recite the United Methodist theology, but I know what I believe and hope you will engage with me in conversation that will enrich and deepen all of our understanding. My hope is that by practicing together we can find a spirit of generosity that will enhance and reflect our personal relationship with God and that we will be comfortable discussing with others.

Faith or Action - or Balancing Both?

2011-09-28T19:04:00.000-07:00

We have finished the sermon series on the book of James, looking forward to starting on Extravagant Generosity next week. (Read: Come and Join Us!) Since I had to miss a couple of weeks, in order to come up with something for this post I tried to do a little research and learned that James is a pretty controversial book. Some interpret his writings to be in direct opposition to Paul's doctrine of justification through faith alone. Others find that James actually reconciles the differences between Paul/faith and The Law/Acts. Bible .org has an outline and summary by Daniel Wallace that lists eight theses about the book of James:

1) James does not deny the necessity of faith, only its inadequacy.
2) James is addressing the fruit of salvation, while Paul is addressing the root of salvation.
3) In keeping with other biblical writers, James does not use "works" as a criterion for judging others, but as a criterion for judging oneself.
4) For James, the faith which does not save is intellectual assent; for Paul the faith which does save is a heart-response to God's call- it is trust in, not just belief that. Thus, they are not talking about the same thing.
5) For James, "justified" means either "vindicated" or "eschatologically justified"; for Paul, it means "declared righteous." Thus, they are not taking about the same thing,
6) For James, "works" means good deeds-charity, Christian love, etc.; for Paul, it means works of the Law which some see as necessary for salvation, rendering the cross-work of Christ as less than adequate. Thus, once again, they are not taking about the same thing.
7) James seems to look at how our spiritual status is seen and approved/disapproved by others, while Paul looks at how it is seen and initiated by God.
8) Both James and Paul would agree with the statement that genuine, saving faith results in works. Or that sola fide, properly understood, means that we are saved by faith alone, but the faith that saves is not alone.

I think I like those eight theses because they sum up the book in a way that says to me James is trying to lay down some guidelines that will help the new church find a way to live in community with each other and with non-believers. He is looking to reconcile the converted Jews who are holding on to the Law, and the gentile believers who clutch at justification by faith since they didn't have the law. It seems to me that an over-zealous embrace of Paul's doctrine would lead to self-centered faith, one that focuses inward and doesn't encourage believers to reach out to others, to walk the walk.

And walking the walk is such a blessing. When we live our faith, our actions are a reflection and a response to the gift God gives us. Each small daily act becomes an act of worship, and also has the potential to incarnate God for others. In helping others, we ourselves are helped and changed. It seems to me that James just wanted to be sure the pendulum didn't go too far in either direction - works or faith.

2011-09-16T16:19:00.000-07:00

Sorry I haven't updated this for quite a while now. I was waiting to see what would happen with our Wednesday Bible Study (not starting up yet), the sermon series (I have missed two), and life. I have asked another contributor to get us some information on the sermon series - Faith and Action - but I invite you to go on Sunday morning and check it out for yourself!

Faith and Action. I have always thought talk was cheap, and we (I) need to act and live out our (my) beliefs. But have you ever noticed that is easier said than done? There are always so many "good" excuses. At least there are in my head. How about yours? Sometimes I listen to the small, quiet voice that tells me to talk to the person who looks so sad, to offer help to the woman in the parking lot, to offer a silent prayer for the harried mother who is losing her temper at the grocery store. But most of the time, I admit, I rush through life, not paying attention to anything or anyone that doesn't fit into my list for the day.

Faith and Action. When I hear those words I think of the huge, grandiose, news-grabbing projects. Habitat. Rebuilding. Joplin Mission Trips. While I really like to do those things, I have to balance it with my other commitments. And the voice inside mt head says if I can't do those wonderful works, then I can't act. I am not faithful. True?

FALSE! Some of you may think I am just trying to make myself feel better, and part of me is. But as I worked on this piece I tried to honestly consider my own experiences and what I know of the experiences of others. As I weighed them I came to firmly believe it is the small, daily, thoughtful acts that matter the most. When I focus on a thoughtful, kind, generous attitude it changes my whole day, my whole outlook, my whole life. Don't get me wrong, I am no saint and not able to sustain that attitude over extended periods of time. The euphoria and adrenaline that accompany those really big works last only a short while. Even when I reflect back on them, look at the pictures, talk with other participants, it isn't the same. But, by just trying to have an attitude of generosity I change my whole outlook.

Faith and Action. I can act, out my own personal faith every single day. I can do something for others. And I have found that it changes me more than those around me.

Speed Bumps and Sinkholes

2011-08-12T06:31:00.000-07:00

This Learner has been struggling with so many questions lately. Some of them are speed bumps like the person who just cut me off in rush hour traffic, the lost dry-cleaning, the 6,439th break down of my sixteen-year-old car. Some of them are sinkholes like why do parents get ill, suffer, die; why are young people struck with disabling, life-threatening or life-claiming illness; why do people who have fought and worked hard all their lives have to face more adversity in their "golden years"; why do loyal, hard workers lose their job; why is life so hard for some people; why are some left behind, even when they are ready to move on to the next life; why can't I have control of any of these issues? I have an abundance of why's. Unfortunately, I am not hearing any answers right now.

In my head I know that faith is accepting that there will be questions, there are answers, I just don't always get to know what they are. Faith, for me, is about living with the questions, talking about the questions. Faith is also about being OK with the fact that my heart still really wants the answers, and wants them badly enough to get really angry when I don't get to know them. Some days I honestly feel like stomping my foot and shaking my fist at heaven, or throwing myself on the ground in a full out, rolling, squirming, crying, wailing, two-year-old tantrum. Cognitively I know that neither will do me one bit of good, but emotionally I know either would release some of the frustration and maybe allow me to move one.

I have been trying to look for more positive, productive, socially-acceptable ways of coping with the questions. In my quest to help a friend with the same issue I came across the following, attributed to St.Francis de Sales:

Do not look forward to what may happen tomorrow; the same everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you tomorrow and every day. Either He will shield you from all suffering, or He will give you unfailing strength to bear it. Be at peace, then, put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations, and say continually:

"The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart has trusted in Him and I am helped. He is not only with me, but in me and I in Him."

That last part has been my mantra this week, and it does seem to be helping. Hasn't really reduced my road-rage issue, but it is helping with the bigger questions. Slowly, but helping. That leaves me wondering how do you deal with the questions? What helps you get through the issues in life, not just the speed bumps, but also the ones that are more like sinkholes that could swallow you and your entire life whole?

Prodigal God #6 - The Elder Brother

2011-07-31T09:54:00.000-07:00

Today was our last sermon on the Prodigal God, so NOTE! Next week we return to our regular schedule - 8:15 Worship Service, 9:30 Sunday School for all ages, 10:30 Worship Service. I thought I got the message last week, about being narrow and refusing to accept the invitation because it didn't fit my definition. OK, that is all about being responsible for myself. But then, today, the pastor discussed the elder brother in the context of his responsibility to the family. Sounded like I was going to have some 'splaining to do.

One of the things I like about Bible study and discussion is that there is a leader who can supply the context, the societal cues that we no longer understand. Did you know that in Victorian times flowers had a meaning that was conveyed by senders to recipients through the combinations included in nosegays? In some cultures wearing a name tag on the left means you are in a relationship, taken, while wearing it on the right means you are available. There are so many subtle clues and communications unique to each culture and time. We may know our own very well, but those that came before us are usually lost.

So it is with the parables, and while it may be uncomfortable, I appreciated the point that was made this morning. The people listening to the parable of the prodigal son would have known immediately that it was the responsibility of the elder brother to go looking for the "lost son." It was his job to keep the family together, no matter the cost to him personally. That was the societal norm, expectation, standard, whatever you want to call it. But in the parable, not only does the elder brother not go looking for his brother, he pouts and refuses to celebrate when he returns. I think that would make him a bit of a pariah in the community, don't you?

If you associate God with the father in the parable, then clearly Jesus becomes the "good" elder brother, who not only went looking for all of us, but paid the ultimate price to keep us in relationship with the family. The more uncomfortable question for me is what to do depending on which brother I identify with personally? I think we have all been both at one time or another, but if I am honest with myself I know I feel more like the elder brother than the younger. Then the question becomes, would I be willing to take on that responsibility, to go looking for my lost brothers at any cost? It makes his pouting a little less offensive if I put myself in those shoes.

So what if those of us who are "churched" are the elder brothers? How do we go about looking for our lost brothers and bring them back into the fold? What is the current societal norm, and what is God's expectation? I thought today would tie things up with a nice bow for me, but it seems I am left with more questions, more uncomfortable questions, than at the beginning of the series. The one thing I do see more clearly is the prodigal nature of God, and for that I give thanks (and a sigh of relief).

Prodigal God - Number 5

2011-07-24T19:11:00.000-07:00

Today was our penultimate discussion of The Prodigal God. (I always look for opportunities to use that word ever since I learned it. So much classier that next to last.) We were discussing chapters 6 and 7, but we really focused in on home. We had a report from our mission team who worked on making a home for Margaret, a victim of the Joplin tornado, so it seemed very appropriate. Both of the sons in the parable were seeking home, we humans always seem to long for home, but how do you define home?

I was particularly intrigued by Keller's assertion on page 101, "If we read the narrative in light of the Bible's sweeping theme of exile and homecoming we will understand that Jesus has given us more than a moving account of individual redemption. He has retold the story of the whole human race, and promised nothing less than hope for the world." His argument is that we were created to live in the garden of Eden with God, but we are separated from God by the brokenness within us and around us. We can try with all our might to recreate home, but all we will find are exiles and returns, much like we see in the history of Israel in the Bible. Only the final reconciliation with God, when we return to live in the shade of the Tree of Life, will fill the need for home that exists in all of us.

Well, that was the story for the younger son in the parable, but not the elder son. At least, that was not his story at the end of the parable. What made home for the sons? Clearly the sons each "felt" home differently. The younger son was happy to be an employee, as long as he was with his father and family. And he was happy to accept the father's unqualified invitation. The elder son found home in possessions, and maybe that is why he couldn't go in to the party. He couldn't accept the invitation because it would mean giving up too much of this world. It did not fit his definition of home. What makes home for you? Our discussion focused on good memories of safety, comfort, love, people, relationships. Our images and feelings were pretty homogenous. But what about those who don't have that experience? What about people who have never known love without abuse, never felt safe, never lived in comfort? What kind of home do they long for?

As Christians our ultimate home is with God. There is a homing beacon built into us that makes us long for that return. It is comforting and hopeful to know that God accepts each of us, with our own unique understanding of home. God is waiting for us all, we just need to accept the invitation. For me, I think the lesson is to remember that sometimes I define that return very narrowly, within the scope of my own personal experience. If we are to incarnate God for one another, until that final return home, I need to keep the circle open and remember that we are all in equal need of God's grace. (Sigh) Some days it is so hard to guard against becoming an elder brother...

And then I opened my FB page to find this quote from Paulo Coehlo:

"Today don’t beg, don’t ask, just thank God in silence for all the blessings in your life.”

Prodigal God Series - No. 4 Discussion

2011-07-18T12:01:00.000-07:00

Good afternoon!

Yesterday (7/18/2011) we completed our Fourth in a series of Six discussion events relative the the "Prodigal God" series and again it was extremely interesting. Questions and discussions were still flowing as we approached our 11:00 AM quit time, and Pastor Lyons had to regrettably stop the group so we could go home!

The worship service and discussion sessions focused on Chapter 5 of "The Prodigal God" book and the concepts of "Living out of Gratitude" and "The True Elder Brother". Both topics focused on identifying living, and being thankful for, a life based upon what we have rather than focusing on what we do not have. In the Prodigal Son parable, both sons (The younger and older) are dissatisfied with what they have and devise separate plans to correct what they believe to be shortcomings with what they have received from their Father. The Younger son fails in his attempt to find satisfaction and returns home to his Father; while the Elder Son become bitter and resentful because of what he sees to be an injustice done to him.

Both the worship service and the discussion group focused on the Elder Brother as we looked at how the Elder Son should have responded, using Christ as our example. Jesus is the Son of God, and each of us are children of God; therefore, we are sisters and brothers with Christ. God (the Father) elects out of His Grace to forgive all His sisters and brothers (you and me) and Christ participates by letting Himself be the sacrifice to make it all possible. In the parable, the Elder Brother hesitates to sacrifice his possessions to help the redemption of his younger brother. This hesitancy is totally different than Christ's reaction to God forgiving us, because Christ freely becomes the "sacrificial lamb".

Timothy Keller in his Fifth Chapter is communicating to us how we as Christians are to be elder brothers, in the spirit of Christ, by sharing our lives we have in Christ with those who are still lost; and to do so without hesitation. We are not to look at what we have in a selfish light as did the Elder Brother and withhold what God has given to us. Rather we are to respond as did Christ by offering to share all we have with those who are seeking a relationship with the Father.

Pastor Lyons shared we must be careful at times in teaching others about this repentance factor when helping those who have been mistreated physically by others. It is very difficult many times to ask someone who has been abused to look at their life in a positive light and then live their life out of gratitude. The problem often is the abused person's view of the world around them has been drastically altered and their subsequent ability to understand the positive aspects is very difficult to accomplish. We must rely upon God and be patient with both God and the abused person. We cannot and should not attempt to resolve the issue within our own time frame. We must let the Holy Spirit lead us as we, out of God's love, attempt to help those in need.

God is seeking relationships with us and in turn He is asking us to develop positive relationships with people we encounter. Not judgemental relationships, but relationships the encourage the other person(s) to seek and find their own relationship with God and then respond accordingly.

In the closing sentences of the Prodigal Son parable, the Elder Son is struggling in his relationship with his Father because of the Elder Son's focus on his selfish view. We do not know what the Elder Son ultimately elected to do, but we can look at our own lives and make a decision as to how we want to respond to our heavenly Father. Do we stand outside the door and grumble about what we do not have or do we faithfully walk forward into God's presence and accept all He has to give to us. The choice is ours.

Next week we will be looking into Chapter Six of The Prodigal God series and reviewing how Hope plays a role in our experience with God.

In the meantime - Have a Great Day and Enjoy Life!

Prodigal God Series - No. 3 Discussion

2011-07-11T09:39:00.000-07:00

Good Afternoon! This is Terry Pursley writing this blog because Cindy was unable to attend the "Prodigal God" discussion session this past (July 10, 2011) Sunday and she asked me to take on the task. Therefore; if you do not like the way this blog edition is produced you should blame Cindy because 1) she failed to attend the class and 2) and her poor judgement in selecting her replacement!

This week's discussion of the "Prodigal God" was very interesting with numerous people joining in on the discussion. The theme of both the worship service sermon as well as the discussion session was "He Refused to Go In" and related to the situation where, per the parable, the elder son is standing outside the room wherein the father is hosting a party for his returned Younger son, but the Elder son is mad and debating whether he will attend the party or stay away as a means of protesting his Father's actions.

The discussion group initially focused on how important "possessions" where to both sons and how easy it was for the sons, and us, to focus on our possessions. The Elder son is clearly upset by the fact he is losing some of his promised possessions because in essence the Father is giving a part of them to the returned Younger son. This is extremely irksome to the Elder son because in his mind he has earned, by his hard work, the "right" to receive these possessions whereas the Younger son has simply squandered away the possessions the Father had previously given to him. Both sons were therefore more focused on the possessions rather than the relationship with their Father.

The Discussion Group then asked the question - How do we, as modern day Christian value our possessions relative to our relationship with Christ? Do we value our possessions over our relationship with Christ, or do we value our relationship with Christ over our possessions? The Discussion Group generally agreed we all struggle with this "possession vs Christ" issue and is indeed a part of our lives we need to improve upon.

It was pointed out on page 43 of the book "The Prodigal God" the author Timothy Keller summarizes a key issue with respect to sin and the parable of the Prodigal Son. In summary Keller says "...sin is not just breaking the rules, it is putting yourself in the place of God as Savior, Lord, and Judge...." In the parable, both sons, as a result of their desire for possessions, proceeded to place their judgement above that of their Father and began to pursue courses of action to accomplish their own selfish judgement rather than follow the judgement of their Father. That is what Keller is stating sin is. The Elder son stands outside the party refusing to come in even though his Father has invited him in. The Elder son is sinning, not because he is standing outside the room, but because he is refusing to obey his Father. Similarly in our own lives, acquiring and enjoying possessions is not a sin, but if we do so in any specific instance in direct violation of our heavenly Father's instructions - then we sin. The Elder brother wanted what he determined was his "birth right" because in his mind "he had earned them" and the Elder brother was unable to understand that all of the possessions came from his Father - out of the Father's Grace.

When we as modern day Christians can stand outside our Father's door and agree to enter into his presence on His terms we will find an inner peace that will allow us to reach out to others in the Love of Christ. Just like the two brothers of the parable, we all are at times lost and the parable tells us when we find ourselves in this situation we should simply listen to our Father and joyfully accept his instructions for our lives.

I hope you enjoy this summary and I encourage everyone to come join us to share by both speaking and listening to the deeper meanings of this great parable. Until then -

Have a Great Day and Enjoy Life!

The Prodigal God #2 - Coming to Our Senses

2011-07-03T19:58:00.000-07:00

What does it mean when the younger brother in the parable comes to his senses? (Luke15:17) I really have to sit and consider the implications behind that verse, and wonder if the imagery was more clear for those listening to the parable first hand? Those words almost write off the actions of the younger brother as a phase, a good kid who made some bad choices. I have heard and seen and been that before, haven't you? In some ways that is comforting, to think that even if I make bad choices God will be waiting for me to come to my senses.

The next part makes sense, where else would you go but home? I suppose he could have stayed in that country and made some more bad choices, or gone on to another, farther place, but he chooses to go home. In addition, he formulates a plan that will allow him to repay the financial/material debt he owes his father. He realizes that he cannot undo his actions, take back the disrespect, and he does not expect any more than what he has seen his father offer to others. That speaks of humility and a change of heart to me. And I wonder what there was in his relationship with his father that allows him to believe that his father will consider and honor his plan? He must have had a better relationship than we would assume based on his actions.

When he does return, what he receives is so much more than he had any right to expect. It shows us that we need God, we need grace, and we need to be open to it in whatever form it comes. No expectations. There may be big moments with rings and robes and sandals, but they are more likely to be small, daily whisperings that are easy to miss if we go around looking for burning bushes. No expectations.

I don't know about you, but I feel like I have been drilled and also drilled my kids that there are consequences for what we do. If x then y. That works in the physical world, but not in the spiritual world. It is difficult to comprehend that God loves us so much, that we cannot do anything to earn God's love, we simply have it, that all we can is respond to that love. When I try to wrap my mind around that, I often find that our rituals and habits get in the way. They give a false sense of security.

Sometimes I do a little research to help clarify and expand my understanding, and in that process this week I found the following information:

http://wmson.wordpress.com/2006/10/17/tim-keller-the-discipline-of-gospel-repentance/

It gives some suggestions on how to consider and evaluate our own behavior and then seek what Keller calls gospel repentance. This is about earnest, honest, hard work. I think sometimes the words fall off my tongue too quickly and too glibly. Too much of a Pharisee... Since I am hardheaded I guess it takes hard work in order to get me to come to my senses.

The Prodigal God, Part One SSS

2011-06-26T16:49:00.000-07:00

Today we started a sermon series base on the book, "The Prodigal God" by Timothy Keller, roughly corresponding to the intro and Chapter One of the book. In these posts I will do my best to summarize the sermon, discussion and maybe add a few thoughts.

The pastor began the sermon be recapping the author's statement that there are two basic ways of finding happiness - moral conformity (elder brother, Pharisees, us?) or self discovery (younger brother, tax collectors and sinners, the un-churched?), and the followers of each believe their way to be exclusive. In the parable Jesus says that both ways are wrong, because they focus on human acts earning happiness, God's grace. The parable begins by stating there was a man who had two sons... and neither one could earn their father's love, they had it no matter what. When they rejected, disrespected, and dishonored their father he still invited them to be in relationship with him, without condition. He loves them for just who they are, just as they are.

Then the pastor chose to illustrate this point by comparing us to sheep! Yes, sheep! Now, I grew up in the city, in an apartment, so I had no idea that sheep are not the sharpest tools in the shed. Evidently, if they run off the shepherd must chase them down, then carry them home because they won't follow, they will just run off again. And this is where those three s's come in - Sheep-Shepherd-Search. Can you make the connection? We are the sheep, of course God is the shepherd, and the search? It is not just God offering us grace, no matter what. It is also about being in community with each other.

In looking over the notes from the discussion it seems that everyone else was pretty much feeling the same way I was. We are, by and large, a part of that solid, middle ground, taught from infancy that if you work hard and live right it will all be good in the end, you will be taken care of. But the point of this parable is not the profligate younger brother being taken back into the fold, but how much more dangerous is the position of the elder brother, thinking he has earned his inheritance, then turning away from his father out of anger and resentment. He did what he should do, his brother did not, and it burns his biscuits that the brother was welcomed home, extravagantly. Just like the Pharisees, the "good" brother was in relationship with his father not out of love for his father, but because of the tangible reward he expected. That hit just a little too close to home to be a comfortable thought.

Throughout this first session we were confronted with dichotomies - the Pharisees and the sinners, the older brother and the younger brother, grace through works and grace through love, moral conformity and self discovery, the sheep and the shepherd. I'm not sure it has to be either-or. I can honestly say I have felt like both brothers at some point in my life. I would be much more comfortable if I could be confident that it was either or, because then my efforts at being in relationship with God would mean that I was OK. The problem with that is the other side of that belief dichotomy - those who aren't trying are not OK. It's kind of like if I say "There but for the grace of God go I" flips over to mean that God's grace is not with the other person. Ugh, that is ugly. I don't think I'll be using that saying any more, and maybe (underscore maybe) I will think about how I participate in the suffering of others. (Also uncomfortable.) Sometimes people feel the flip side of our beliefs, even if we don't consciously speak them.

Finally, exactly what does prodigal mean? According to Merriam Webster it means recklessly extravagant, having spent everything. It is amazing to think that God would treat me in that way, and that is just how I want to think I will be treated. It is just selfish to not want the same for everyone else. And I think it is miserly to think that God isn't big enough to be recklessly extravagant with everyone else and still have enough left for me. Looks like I have some work to do...

I am doing my best to take verbatim notes of the discussion. If you would like a PDF copy of the notes from the discussion after the service (which will include the questions from the handout) please send an email to shallow.minds.deep.thoughts@gmail.com with PDF in the subject line.

If you would like an email notification of new posts please send an email to shallow.minds.deep.thoughts@gmail.com with Post Notification in the subject line.

And if you would like to experience it for yourself join us at Salem in Ballwin United Methodist Church this Sunday morning at 9:00 am for the service, discussion following.

Keep Your Humor

2011-06-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

Well, friends, here it is Thursday morning so I guess I will attempt a post in order to stay in practice. This week, looking and listening for the signs, it seems I need to deal with anger. I was fixing dinner and had the TV on in the background for "white noise". It was a replay of Oprah's interview with David Arquette, and for some reason a quote he offered in discussing his own problems really jumped out at me. He couldn't offer a source, and despite a search I couldn't find a definitive source, but will offer it anyway. "Anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."

I know very few people who have never been angry with someone. And holding a grudge is just destructive to the holder, it doesn't touch the grudge-ee. Feeling angry all the time is a miserable way to live. I do agree with that quote - in terms of human relationships. But what about being angry with God? If I am angry with God do I really expect God to die? We don't talk much about dealing with anger toward God, almost making it unacceptable. But there are plenty of examples in the Bible of people who get angry, who question, and God is big enough to take it. In my opinion, dealing with not getting the answer you want is a bigger problem than actually being angry with God. It is hard to be thankful and in relationship with God when God's answer is not the one you want.

Seems I keep getting the message over and over to be thankful, anyway. This week brought more bad news, horrific news actually. A friend of my daughter, 22 years old, brilliant, sweet, talented, generous, is fighting one of the most deadly forms of brain cancer. (I ask that you add Kim and her family to your prayers today, as she bravely faces this opponent down.) I am going to be honest, at first I was really, really sad. But then I got really, really angry. At God. Why do these things keep happening?

News like that just points out how blatantly good my life is, how very grateful I should be. Sure, my kids are far away (having the time of their lives), my work and day-to-day activities aren't the dream life society tells me I "should" have, but I have it good. For now we have a comfortable home, transportation, food, health care, family, church, community, safety,...health. What is there to be angry about? Really?

In my own defense, I am going to lay some of this at the feet of the media. We are constantly inundated with all the bad news, all the things going wrong, making it easy to fall into a mind set of scarcity and fear. In a culture of negativity it is difficult to be positive. In a culture that focuses on me-me-me, it is difficult to remember that we are each fighting our own battles. For instance, the person who just cut me off on "Manslaughter Road" may be rushing to the hospital to see to a loved one, not just trying to make me really, really angry. The volunteer who failed to show up may have just learned that they are very, very sick. Gosh, I can think up generous, "forgivable" reasons for the things that make me angry instead of always going to the negative and looking at how it impacts me.

One of my favorite Bette Midler songs, "Laughing Matters", sums it up for me. I offer those lyrics here as a reminder to myself - keep it in perspective, and keep your humor. And be thankful, I really do have it pretty good.

Live at Five and CNN
Keep us all abreast
of breaking stories that can tend
to make us anxious and depressed.
Problems with no answers hang on like some chronic cough
And every day, some brand new issue,
Rears it's head to piss you off.

Bad guys win.
Optimism's wearing thin.
Things are spinning out of control.
Cynicism's all the fad.
World events can make us mad as hatters.
Almost every day,
Some underpinning slips away.
Friends, these aren't laughing matters.

Time bombs tick.
People keep on getting sick.
And a nickel's not worth a cent.
Wickedness and greed abound.
Just as peace is gaining ground it's shattered.
Hate is here to stay,
And justice goes to those who pay.
Friends, these aren't laughing matters.

The truth is scarier by far
Than anything that Stephen King could write.
The stories in the paper are
The daily small decline and fall
Spelled out in black and white.

Oh what to do, what to do?
How to take a brighter view
When your noodle's totally fried?
Human spirits need to be
Leavened with a little levity.
So take those blues and bounce them off the wall.
Keep your humor, please,
'Cause don't you know it's times like these when
Laughing matters most of all.

Messages and Signs and Finding Balance

2011-06-03T05:46:00.000-07:00

I am a huge fan of a book I recently read, "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coehlo. The underlying premise is that the Universe (God) gives us signs and directs us on our own personal journeys, but we need to be vigilant, open to seeing the signs and faithful enough to follow them. Reflecting back on some of my most meaningful experiences hindsight tells me that the premise is correct, so I have been trying to do that. Like everything else in life, though, some days it is more difficult to see the signs than others, but this week I got the proverbial 2x4 up side of my head. Again.

I know I said last time that I was going to be thankful, and I have been. But, being human, I have also been petulant, pouty, disappointed that things haven't gone just the way I wanted them to go. I didn't actually complain, but I haven't been very nice, either. I believe that we all go through periods of time when we focus too much on ourselves, our own wants and other times when we focus too much on others. If only we could find a balance between "me" and "everyone else", stopping the pendulum from constantly swinging too far in one direction and then back, too far the other way.

My wake up call this week came early - literally. One morning at the gym one of my friends approached to tell me that his wife has been diagnosed with cancer, they would appreciate prayers. At 82, after having had other health issues and surgeries, she was now staring down yet another lethal opponent. And I was feeling angry because I couldn't have the day go just the way I wanted it to go. OK, I get the message, I really don't need another whack.

The good news is that there is reason to be hopeful, good reports from the doctor and treatable disease. In addition to all the others we have on our lists, PH and her family, all the people in Joplin, Massachusetts, whoever is on your own personal list, please add Pat B. and her family. I plan to also offer thanks that I was able to see the sign and get the message, but ask for lots and lots of help remembering it, finding that balance more often than not.

Giving Thanks, Asking for Miracles

2011-05-27T09:57:00.000-07:00

We cancelled our meeting this week because of the threat of impending foul weather, and it was a good call. The sirens were going off all afternoon and evening, it seemed. I'm sure we are all giving thanks that in our immediate area there was no major damage.

Other areas not so far away have not been that fortunate. Indeed, one of our church members still has a family member missing after the storms on Monday in Joplin. Unfortunately, the other side of being thankful for having been spared is a heart breaking for those who were not. I don't know about you, but I will be offering flip-flopping prayers. Giving thanks for what I have received (without knowing why I should have received it) and asking for miracles for those who are suffering. The hard part is accepting the answer if it isn't the one I anticipate.

Our group is finished meeting for the summer, but we will begin a church-wide sermon and study series on June 26 - The Prodigal God. I am intrigued by the title alone. I think we will use this forum as follow up so that those who have vacation and other commitments can follow along even if we have to miss a Sunday or two. In the meantime, all you will get is my crazy musings unless someone else would care to weigh in...?

Let's Go Fishing,Or...

2011-05-19T18:13:00.000-07:00

We have been looking at the story of the risen Jesus, what it took for the disciples to believe in the resurrection, and what it takes for us to believe. This week we looked at John 21, after the empty tomb, after Jesus reveals himself, after he breathes on them and gives them the Holy Spirit, after Thomas feels the wounds. And what did the group do next? They went fishing.

As I reflected on the group dynamics going on at that time, it occurred to me that I probably would have been more comfortable engaging in an activity that could be explained as necessary, that would allow me to avoid thinking about everything that had just happened, and that would perhaps restore some of my lost self-image and self-worth. I am definitely more Martha than Mary, always busy, seeing and feeling the value of doing. As fishermen, even though they had spent the last three years in ministry, I think that same work-ethic-comfort would have been deeply ingrained in the disciples.

By this time it was clear that Peter was going to be one of the leaders, if not the leader. But how could he effectively lead when he had denied Jesus not once, not twice, but three times? If he doubted himself and his worthiness to serve, how could he lead? How could he ever redeem himself from that awful betrayal? In the face of all that tumult, emotion, doubt, misery why not go fishing? It was something concrete, familiar, comforting, that he knew how to do well, that could help him retrieve a little self respect. I imagine the others felt the same way because they just went along. No discussion, just followed.

And what happens? Peter and the others are a failure, catching no fish all night. Nada. Zip. Zero. None. BUT, when they listen to the stranger on the shore and face the failure the net comes back full. There are many explanations for the significance of the number of fish - 153 - but I think it really means that there were so many it could have broken the net. And it didn't. They trusted and followed, from where they were, engaged in a familiar activity in which they were proficient and comfortable, in their broken, dejected confused and overwhelmed state.

When they recognize Jesus he doesn't chastise them for fishing instead of following the commission he gave them. First he tells them what to do in order to be successful, then he sets the stage, a charcoal fire on the beach that mirrors the fire where Peter denied him. And then three times He asks the question, and three times Peter answers, finally feeling the redemption from his betrayal. No matter what state of broken-ness, doubt, failure, Jesus still sees value and cares about each one. Each one still has the ability to go out and carry The Message to the world. And I can't help wondering, if Jesus reached out and thoroughly redeemed Peter then what will He do for us? For me?

2011-05-18T06:43:00.000-07:00

Yet another late post. Better late than never, right? Last Wednesday we tried to discuss the 23rd Psalm. I say tried because even though this is not a shy group when it comes to talking or expressing opinions, last week's session was decidedly quiet.

1The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want.
2He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.
3He restores my soul.
He leads me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

This comforting psalm is so closely associated with funerals that I find it difficult to think of it in any other context. I did a quick search and found lots of commentary, but the one that intrigued me suggested we see this as a comfort for this life, not the passage into the next, and that it addresses the past, present and future. For instance, loosely paraphrasing:

Past - Because the Lord is my shepherd I shall not want for anything. I shall not want for food because like a sheep he makes me lie down in green pastures. I shall not want for drink because he leads me beside still waters. (Someone told me that sheep will not drink from running water, but I haven't been able to verify that.) God restores my soul, He sees that I have everything I need. By keeping me on the right paths he protects me from danger.

Present - Even though I am in the deepest trouble, walking through the Valley of Death, God is with me to comfort me and protect me, just as He has always done.

Future - I will come out of this trial and God will provide for me, setting a table before me in the presence of my enemies, anointing me with oil to show that I am His. Because I belong to God, His goodness and mercy will follow me until I go to live with Him in the next life, forever. This is the true joy in life, to love and be loved by God.

Pretty basic wants, especially when we are bombarded with messages telling us what we want, what we should want, what we lack. Critical thinking when doing anything these days is essential to identifying what we truly need, and what is media-induced want. Food, water, comfort, safety. Is that all there is?

The other part of this that I find uncomfortable is the submission, as sheep. Everything I have read says that sheep are dumb as a box of rocks and will follow whatever the first one does. So the image of a shepherd caring for His flock implies that the sheep are incapable of caring for themselves, they require a shepherd in order to survive and thrive. In this driven, individualistic society it is difficult to accept or embrace the idea that we cannot do it all for ourselves. That we have to humble and submit and allow God to do things for us.

I can see the different point of view on this psalm now, but I still don't think I can separate it from funerals, from death. How do we break that association in order to use old, familiar things in new, life-giving ways?

Called... And Equipped

2011-05-14T07:25:00.000-07:00

Yes, this post is very late. Life got in the way, as it sometimes does. Our meeting on May 4 focused on the disciples walking on the road to Emmaus, a follow up on the previous week's discussion about what it takes for us to believe that Christ rose.

In this story Jesus is equipping the disciples with the tools they will need to carry The Message out into the world. They have learned what to say during their time in ministry with Jesus on Earth. How many times did he sit the group down for a parable or two? After his resurrection they seem in need of focusing. He re-instructs them on the scriptures of the Old Testament that will allow them to connect with the Jews in their audience, but also provide prophecy that anyone could see fulfilled in Jesus. He eats the fish so they can honestly, believingly claim they saw his risen body. He hides his identity from them until they break bread together to give them the understanding that not everyone will recognize him at the same time in the same way. He is teaching them how to say the what.

The infamous "they" say that it takes 21 separate encounters with Christ before a person is ready to make a commitment. This knowledge gives us the opportunity to reflect not only on our own experiences, but how we provide those opportunities for others through the ministry of our congregation. We do a good job of knowing the "what", but I think the "how" is more important. Looking back at how Jesus equipped the people who had walked with him in the flesh helps me remember to be more open and diverse and accepting of the world views I encounter in our community. As "they" say, "God does not call the equipped, he equips the called."

Show Me!

2011-04-27T19:04:00.000-07:00

Missouri is the Show Me State. It is that strong, solid, Midwestern, down to earth, nose to the grindstone, show me ethic that gives us our sensibility and stubbornness. The state animal is the Missouri Mule. So, I think you should have a pretty good idea of what to expect if you ask one of us what it takes for us to believe something. Proof.

Our new study is focusing on the resurrection story and what it took for the Disciples to believe Jesus had risen. If you read the different versions in each of the four gospels it becomes clear that the apostles did not have a common understanding of the event. There are significant differences from one to the next. The individual accounts are probably also colored by the audience for whom they were writing - Matthew's focus on the fulfillment of prophecy indicates a Jewish audience; Mark's fact-based Greek gospel implies non-Jewish Christians, maybe Romans; Luke's writing for the Gentiles; and John seeks to reach all people, expanding from the "what" to the "why" of Jesus. But in each account the witnesses leave the tomb believing in a very unnatural event.

I couldn't help but think they had a big advantage over us. They had been traveling with Jesus for three years, they had seen miracles first hand. I am sure I have seen miracles, but none like those described in Jesus' ministry. Even though they had seen Jesus' work and been told that this would happen, they still just thought the body had been stolen when they found the empty tomb. Despite their own unique experience and understanding, they took a while to get past "show-me." So maybe I'm not that bad after all.

What does it take for us to believe the story? While thinking about just what it takes for us to believe is a very valuable exercise, I think the take-away for me tonight was about the need to differentiate the message. That has been a hot button word in education recently, and it basically means offering material in several different ways, at several different levels, so that it both challenges and advances the skills and knowledge of each student at an individually appropriate level. Differentiation honors that fact that not all students are at the same level of understanding, interest, and ability at the same time and allows them to progress at their own level, at a pace that will allow success.

Sometimes we aren't willing to differentiate The Message as we go out to make disciples. We get an almost OCD-like compulsion, seeing only one way to do things. Our way. And yet, God differentiated the Gospels in order to reach more people. God differentiated the way he reached and reaches out to us, willing to meet us where we are and allow us to progress at our own pace. Why is it so difficult for us to do the same? Not only for others, but for ourselves?

Waving Palms, Lifting Psalms

2011-04-14T16:05:00.000-07:00

As we prepare for Easter, remembering the events of Holy Week, it seems fitting that we start out with a study of Psalm 103. This is the epitome of the praise Psalms. You can read it on my favorite online tool, Bible Gateway. Before you click on the link, though, think about the most wonderful, marvelous thing that has ever happened to you. Then compare that to the gift of grace and salvation. How does your experience measure up to God's gift to us?

The Psalmist begins and ends the Psalm with praise and blessing of God. The filling in this praise sandwich tells us just how God saves us, the five (or in some versions six) steps in salvation - forgiving, healing, redeeming, crowning with mercy, satisfying your desires. The actions of God are followed by a description of God that seems to me totally NOT Old Testament. The image is of a loving, forgiving, patient, generous God. Creator of all, Lord of all, Redeemer of all who love him.

So, is this the God that the people saw when they laid down the palms for Jesus? They were expecting a military leader, one who wold overthrow the kingdoms of this world and make their lives better. When he turned out to not be what they expected, they turned on him. I could see them offering up this Psalm on one day, and then cursing him the next. How intolerant and fickle we can be!

If I am honest, I feel guilty when I think about that. I get angry when I don't get the answer I want to my prayers, or when I don't feel any answer at all. I try to remember to be thankful, praise-ful, give up my need for control even though it is really, really difficult. But, I hope like you, I am not perfect. I am not always successful. The good news, and the Psalmist reminds me, is that God is forgiving. God will heal my hurts, in mercy Jesus redeems my soul, and the desires of my soul that are good for my soul will be satisfied. Yours, too.

Water, Water Everywhere

2011-04-07T05:12:00.000-07:00

Sorry, no post last week but I heard we started the discussion of the other United Methodist sacrament - baptism. Even though as United Methodists most of us have no recall of our baptism as infants, we do get to relive it every time another baby is baptized, expanding the community of believers. Baptism is so full of hope and promise, not only in the innocent child but also in the sound of the water as the pastor pours it into the font. You have to admit there is something compelling, calming, soothing about just the thought of water. My happy place often includes water - sitting by the edge of the ocean, floating in a warm pool in the sunshine, fishing, waterfalls in the forest. But like communion, I mostly find myself going through the motions, reading and responding in the liturgy, without consciously thinking about what it all means.

We do celebrate infant baptism, as opposed the to believer's baptism which requires the individual to be of sufficient age and reason as to be able to choose to be baptized and profess their faith. We only baptize once because once the covenant is made, the original sin is redeemed, so there is no need to repeat the sacrament. God acts, reorienting the individual's spirit or soul to be more open and welcoming of God's grace. United Methodists celebrate baptism as a public event, within the community of believers because it also require a commitment on the part of the congregation to welcome the individual and support and nurture their spiritual growth. We talked about the United Methodist requirements for communion - that you believe in Jesus Christ and earnestly repent of your sins - and noted the requirements for baptism are 1) at least one sponsor must be a member of the church 2) parents/sponsor must agree to raise the child in the church. No real revelations in any of those points for me, but I did gain a richer, deeper, and actively conscious understanding of the covenant that is made.

What do we do, and why do we do it? Those have been the questions in this study, and they are great questions to consider. Some of us never really learned these things, some of us feel better not thinking about these things, some of us have gone into rote memorization mode and forgotten these things. This study has brought this Learner back to conscious and deliberate participation in our sacraments. More than that, I have discovered that I must have been meant to be a United Methodist because "the church's" tenets fit almost perfectly with my own personal beliefs. Could it be because I was raised in this church? Maybe, but I like to think that during the decades when I fell away from the church, I formulated a personal theology. Some would criticize that, saying we need to follow "the church's" theology, but I come back to Wesley's quote, "In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity."

Communion - All About You

2011-03-24T18:58:00.000-07:00

Wow! We had a much expanded group with many new faces. Why don't you come and join us this week? We will start the study at 5:30 and then there will be dinner at 6:30. Rumor has it pot roast is on the menu this Wednesday...

Because there were so many new folks our Fearless Leader did a great job of recapping sacraments in general and also items particular to United Methodists. We recalled that a sacrament is an outward sign of an inward grace, the work of God within humans, and through them God discloses things that are beyond human capacity to understand through reason alone. Some faiths observe sacraments ( the action of God) while others observe ordinances, which are remembrances commanded by God but in which humans are the actors.

That moved us into some of the different understandings of the elements - the bread and wine. Some faiths believe in transubstantiation - the actual physical properties of the bread and wine are changed to be the body and blood of Christ. For some, mainly those who follow ordinances, the elements are a memorial representation. As United Methodists, we fall in the middle. Our liturgy and beliefs tie us to the Bible stories and we call the living Christ to us through the elements. If Christ was merely human then the most we could do would be to remember him, as a memory. Because we believe Christ is divine, we call the living Christ to us.

In doing so we remember not only what God has done in the Biblical narrative, but what God is doing for us here and now. We remind ourselves of the New Covenant - the indwelling of God in our hearts, the unmerited grace that is extended to us - and we offer ourselves as "... a holy and living sacrifice..." What, exactly, does that mean? That we sacrifice our will for the will of God? And is there a right or a wrong way to take communion? Sometimes we use intinction, or individual cups, or a community cup. As United Methodists we only use grape juice, some faiths only use wine. In our church we have used wafers, crackers, bread cubes, and individually torn bread. In some churches you walk to the front, in some you kneel at an altar or rail, in others communion is taken while seated in your pew or chair. The United Methodist tradition of celebrating communion once a month, or even once a quarter, grew out of the reliance on circuit riders, who were only with congregations on a limited basis. John Wesley called on us to celebrate communion as often as possible, and some of the newer congregations celebrate communion every week. If you would like to research the United Methodist understanding a good place to start is here: http://www.gatewayumc.org/pdf/hcfinal2.pdf

We closed questioning in what form is communion most meaningful to you? And therein, my friends, lies the benefit of attending an organized study like this. Clearly there are many ways to celebrate communion, and many understandings of its purpose, but the big question is what does it mean for you? Joining in a class like this affords me (or sometimes forces me) to take at least one hour a week to think about important questions of faith. When I recite the liturgy do I really know and feel the sacrifice for me? Do I really comprehend the magnitude of the gift of grace, for me? Does it really matter what form the sacrament takes, or is celebrating the sacrament and feeling and understanding it on the deepest levels what is important?

One of my favorite Wesley quotes is, "In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity." Our emphasis is on an individualized understanding of and relationship with God within the framework of the essentials. Each one of us is shaped by our own unique experiences and history, so how can we experience and understand God in the same way as our neighbors? This is why I am a United Methodist. Not because my Grandmother said so, or because it is the church of my childhood (even though it is). In this church I can develop and grow and have a unique understanding of faith in the non-essentials, know that I have a community of faith that is firmly rooted and bound together by the essentials, and we reach out to all in charity. And in closing, another favorite Wesley-ism, "Though we may not think alike, may we not all love alike?"

Breaking Bread

2011-03-16T19:31:00.000-07:00

First, the invitation. We had great discussion, but even better dinner together. Why not plan to join us next week? Discussion at 5:30, dinner at 6:30 so those of us who sing in the choir can make 7:00 rehearsal. Come on, it's fun! And it means one less dinner to plan and prepare!

We started out last week by looking at the sacraments, learning what a sacrament is, and this week we moved on to focus on one of the sacraments. So why do we celebrate communion? What's with the different names for it - The Lord's Supper, Holy Communion, Eucharist. And as United Methodists, what are some of the key points in which we believe?

Nuts and bolts - we learned that the name Lord's Supper references 1 Corinthians chapter 11:20, the last supper Jesus celebrated with the Disciples. Thank you, Paul, for the name. Holy Communion emphasizes the coming together in community of people with people and the people with God. And, finally, Eucharist is from the Greek for thanksgiving, or gratitude. Luke 22:17-19 describes Jesus giving thanks at The Last Supper. United Methodists need an ordained elder or commissioned local pastor to bless the elements and to pray the epiclesis - the invocation of the Holy Spirit in the liturgy. That would be the part that goes, "Pour out your Holy Spirit on us gathered here, and on these gifts of bread and wine. Make them be for us the body and blood of Christ, that we may be for the world the body of Christ, redeemed by his blood..." And we settled on the thought that Jesus chose common elements, bread and wine, because they would be consumed regularly by everyone. That makes communion and relationship with God open and available to everyone.

But is there a danger in using common elements? Does regular celebration with common elements lead to a mundane, rote ceremony? The United Methodist Church moved the liturgy from the back of the old hymnals to the front of the new hymnals and even created a document - This Holy Mystery: A United Methodist Understanding of Communion - to highlight and emphasize the importance and significance of Holy Communion. Part of me has to wonder what spurred the creation of that document. I know that I sometimes just go through the motions, having memorized the congregational part of the liturgy some time ago. It becomes an act, a work of man, something we "should" do. And therein lies the benefit for me of this study. It is renewing my awe, understanding, and wonder that Jesus died for my sins, that he loved me enough to do that. Really? Me?! I grew up in a hell-fire-brimstone church and internalized the message very early on - I was not and am not worthy, never will be. So really, there is a mistake. That "everyone" reads "everyone except you" on my pages.

As United Methodists we celebrate an open table, a table that is open even to children. That means you don't have to be United Methodist, you don't have to be a member of our congregation, you don't have to be "good enough" in order to come to the table. Our liturgy says, "Christ our Lord invites to his table all who love him, repent of their sin and seek to live in peace with one another." His table. That is the most important point for me, remembering that it is the Lord's table and He says who is welcome. And if God finds me good enough to die for my sins, to work in my life, to offer me undeserved grace that on my own I could never earn, then the least I can do is use the physical act of communion to remember all that.

For next week's class we will start by thinking this week on another part of the liturgy of communion. It is:

"And so, in remembrance of these your mighty acts in Jesus Christ, we offer ourselves in praise and thanksgiving as a holy and living sacrifice, in union with Christ's offering for us, as we proclaim the mystery of faith."

What does it mean and how do we offer ourselves as a holy and living sacrifice?

Please be sure to check in here for notices about possible time changes for the class. In this very busy season there is a great demand on our facilities, and we may have to dance quickly. We will post any changes to our regular schedule as quickly as possible.

Giving Up

2011-03-09T13:33:00.000-08:00

It is Ash Wednesday, and as I mentioned last week we will not be meeting tonight, but we will be breaking bread together and celebrating a sacrament - Holy Communion. I thought about not posting this week, but it turns out I didn't have to look far for inspiration. I got the proverbial 2X4 to my head, and here is how the story goes:

I was talking to a single friend this week. She was excited that she had met a really nice guy a couple of weeks ago and looking forward to getting to know him. They had met for coffee a couple of times, chatted online, a casual and easy relationship so far. Then, out of the blue, he tells her that he just doesn't see them dating. Basically, in not so many words, he kindly told her that she just wasn't Christian enough for him.

Those of you who know me probably saw the hackles go up on the back of my neck, my lips curl back and heard that low growl beginning to rumble. That's what happened in my mind, so that the wolf in me could hunt him down and make him pay for hurting my friend. Wow! That is a really graphic image, probably the result of our vampire-werewolf obsessed culture. I suppressed the urges and tried to counsel my friend, telling her she really didn't want to be with a guy who made a judgment like that after just a couple of weeks. He probably needed to be black and white, strict, dogmatic and narrow minded. By the time we finished I think I had her thanking her lucky stars, seeing it as a good thing, and yet she was still willing to pursue a friendship with him.

I have to admit I was feeling pretty proud of myself. I had helped my friend over a rough spot. I knew this guy must be a lousy human being to be so mean to her. After all, who thinks they are a better Christian than the next guy? And right about then is when it happened. If you had been standing anywhere near me you would have seen me stagger when that darn hunk of wood caught me upside of the head. Thwack! I was being just as judgmental, and in some ways even meaner, than he was! Man! I really do hate it when my own words are wielding a 2x4 and looking for me.

How many times have I said that I believe in a God of change, who constantly reaches out to each one of us in ways that we will be able to understand, in ways that facilitate and encourage our response. So, if I really do believe that then why wouldn't God have reached out to this fellow in such a way that he will be able to be in relationship with God based on his own unique experiences? It isn't that his way is better or worse than mine, just that it's different. And that different just didn't mesh with my friend's understanding. (Sigh) Yep. There's a bite mark on my behind, too.

In the children's sermon this week our student pastor talked about fasting, or giving something up for Lent. As Methodists we don't always follow that practice but she encouraged all of us to try it. I had planned to give up my current go-to-when-I'm-stressed-food, thinking it would force me to actually deal with my feelings and help with my weight loss journey. But after the head-thwacking knocked some sense into me, my mind cleared and I realized I had other work to do. Then it came to me. I pulled out the purple bracelet and put it back on my wrist. A group of us had tried the Complaint Free World challenge a couple of years ago, and it felt like it was time to remind myself what it was all about. The challenge is to not complain, gossip or criticize for 21 consecutive days. On the way to 21 days, each time you catch yourself complaining, gossiping or criticizing you must switch the bracelet to the opposite wrist and start over again. It is tedious, frustrating and quite an informative exercise. if you would like more information check out this link:

http://www.acomplaintfreeworld.org/

Next time you see me I will have the purple bracelet on, and I will be trying to remember that different is not better or worse, in and of itself; that God reaches out to each one of us in unique ways; and that during this season of Lent I really need to work on contemplating more than just the daily details of life. That way I will be able to see the forest and the trees. And dodge the next 2x4.

Sacred Sacraments

2011-03-02T18:16:00.000-08:00

Housekeeping first - next week (March 9) we will not meet for Bible study, but we will meet at 6:00 for a light supper followed by Ash Wednesday service at 6:45. Join us for either or both. We will resume our meetings on the 16th at 5:30.

This week we began a new study on the sacraments. OK, I knew that baptism and communion are the only sacraments we celebrate in the United Methodist Church, but exactly what does sacrament mean? Do you know what it means? This study will focus on what we believe as United Methodists, so we focused on Wesley's definition of a sacrament as the outward sign of an inward grace. That generated a whole new round of questions. What is grace? Why do we need it? How do we receive it? What does it mean for me? I'll do my best to summarize our discussion and where we landed, and invite my cohorts to correct me when needed. (So be sure to read the comments to see what I got wrong!)

Grace is the unmerited favor of God, or as Brueggeman said, "Grace is grace precisely because it cannot be earned." As Methodists we believe there are three kinds of grace - Prevenient (the grace that comes before everything); Justifying (the grace that allows us to realize our need for grace and internalize that need); Sanctifying (the process and journey of salvation, or as Wesley said "...going on to perfection..."). We need grace because of original sin, because we are all separated from God, because we have free will and God wants us to choose God. But we cannot choose God without an invitation (prevenient grace). When we choose God (justifying grace) we respond to God's invitation and begin the journey (sanctifying grace) to salvation. Kind of a linear progression, but we did spend some time discussing the fact that none of our journeys are linear. There are always setbacks, jumps forward. It's life, and life is messy, but the good news is that it is part of the journey. It is OK to feel like you are apart from God, even when you know in your heart that you are not. Isn't that what happened to Jesus in the Garden?

There are means of grace. These are things that we CAN do to participate with the act of grace in our lives. What are they? Prayer, repentance, worship, Bible study (individual or group), fasting (that is from Wesley and clearly something I have never done), being in community with other believers, the sacraments. So this isn't a get-out-of-jail-free card, we are required to participate.

The sacraments are visible reminders for us of the action of God in our lives. Some denominations celebrate ordinances instead of sacraments, because in their traditions it is the people doing the action. A sacrament requires the belief that God is the actor, apart from anything we do, by grace not by works. Baptism is the work of God and offering of grace to that individual. Communion is the ongoing offering of grace and invitation from God to be in relationship with each one of us - partaking is our response and acceptance.

I don't know about you, but I confess to not having a complete understanding of the sacraments and just going through the motions. I attend service and participate in communion every month, but it has become rote, routine, regurgitation of the memorization. When we have baptism, it is kind of the same thing, only since they are less frequent I do pay a little more attention. I think this study will be good for me, to renew and deepen my understanding of the sacraments will take me a little farther forward on the path I am on, which I really hope is sanctifying grace. But I'm still figuring that one out. Why don't you join us?

Waiting

2011-02-25T12:22:00.000-08:00

We did not meet this week, and I have been slow to post. I considered going back to the discussion on giving back, but that didn't seem to generate much interest or discussion. I found no inspiration in any of my readings or experiences this week. I am feeling empty and spent, for no apparent reason. And just when I was ready to not even try to post anything my own words came back to bite me in the behind. Maybe this is a part of the journey and I am supposed to be learning something in the wilderness. OK, (sigh) my mind is open, my fingers are poised over the keyboard and I am waiting... for divine inspiration.

Waiting - free association - ooh! Song lyrics - waiting for the sun, waiting without reason, waiting for your call, sigo escalando sin encontrar, pero seguire buscando. (Yes, thanks again to JM!) As I let my mind wander, patience and persistence is what I am hearing. Waiting for... I guess I don't really know what I am waiting for, do you know what you are waiting for? I really do wish I had been gifted with patience. It feels imperative that I know what is next, what I am supposed to do, where my life is going, where my family's lives are going. And it feels like I need to know it all now! But patience and persistence keep coming back to my wandering, free-associating mind.

While knowing where I am going and that I am making a difference is probably my subconscious self's greatest desire, my conscious, grounded, practical self knows that just isn't going to happen. Trying to get the two to meet somewhere in the middle (I know, sounds a bit dissociative, doesn't it?) brought me back to the PBS Frontline study we did several years ago on 9-11. Why have the words of the rabbi stuck with me for so very long? I can't recall the exact quote, but do remember that he spoke about embracing the mystery of God. He made it sound so easy...

I really wanted to recall the quote without actually watching the whole program again. It was incredibly draining to watch the devastation of not just the event, but the aftermath. (It may be worth revisiting as we approach the tenth anniversary?) I did a quick search - this is a question that can be answered by Google - and found a link to an interview with the rabbi in only three clicks. Rather than going on I want to encourage you to read this, and wish you peace today.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/faith/interviews/hirschfield.html

Mary and Martha - Grace vs. Works?

2011-02-17T05:17:00.000-08:00

Our Fearless Leader was back this week (but will be gone next week) and we resumed our art-inspired study this week by looking at some works by the Dutch artist Johannes Vermeer. If you want to go out and take a look before you continue on, look at The Milkmaid, The Artist's Studio and Girl With A Pearl Earring. Those were the works for consideration at the beginning of the discussion, but the meat of the discussion centered on Christ in the House of Martha and Mary.

The introductory exercise asked us to think of a celebrity or someone famous to whom you are drawn. (Bet you know who I am thinking about!) Think about why/what you admire about them and how much you know about them. Do you know what they do when something goes wrong? Favorite flavor of ice cream? What is the difference between knowing about someone and knowing them? What is the difference between knowing about God and knowing God?

Then we revisited the works of Caravaggio and Rembrandt to remember the importance of light, chiaroscuro, in their works. There is no documentation of formal training for Vermeer, but he was clearly influenced by the Baroque painters. We looked at Vermeer's works and the use of light, but color as well. Artists send as much message through the composition of their paintings as they do the subject. To me it's as if they have a secret language. We then went on to look at Christ in the House of Martha and Mary.

So what was Vermeer saying in this painting? It's important to note that he was born into a Protestant family, but converted to Catholicism in order to marry his wife. The author of the study parallels Martha-Catholicism-works as a means to heaven with Mary-Protestantism-grace. The discussion about the scripture surrounding Martha and Mary often condemns Martha for her 'busy-ness" and her criticism of her sister, Mary. OK, I dare you to be completely honest. Which one of you HAS NEVER been so focused on taking care of busy-ness tasks that you missed opportunities to sit and visit and simply be. And which one of you has NEVER had an adversarial moment with a sibling? Seriously, these are perfectly normal, human moments and emotions. It seems to me that we read our own personal experiences into our interpretations, so we need to carefully step back and try to consider what the artist was trying to say, but then process what it says to us.

I can see the reason for the comparison between Catholicism and Protestantism. I understand the issue with works and grace. I am going to go out on a limb and say that based on the positioning in the picture, Vermeer is not condemning either sister or philosophy. Jesus extends an open hand to Mary, His left hand rests comfortably and relaxed on the chair, his body and face turn to Martha, the light illuminates both sisters. Martha provides what is needed for the body, while Mary provides spiritual support. It seems to me that both are needed, both are valued, and Jesus invites both into relationship with Him. And He is willing to meet them where they are, there is no sign of asking them to change at all.

That could also be my interpretation. As the oldest sibling it has always been my nature to take care of details and things more than relationships. I identify with Martha so I have a vested interest in her not coming out on the short end of the stick. It is a close, intimate conversation among three friends. The message I am getting is that both are needed but need to be balanced, and God doesn't care where I am in working at that balance. If I respond to the invitation, we will have a relationship.

Giving Back

2011-02-11T07:59:00.000-08:00

I was recently engaged in a conversation on giving, or lack thereof in churches. I don't really think it's any different than the shortfalls we are seeing in all kinds of budgets - personal, educational institutions, municipal, state, federal, charitable organizations. Everyone at every level seems to be in a bind these days. Some of us seemed to feel that giving to the church should fall into a different category because of the scriptural directives. Others felt that because the church has a budget that is administered by church members who are trustworthy we have an obligation to give to meet that budget. I have to confess that there were some other perspectives that I failed to hear because I had an immediate knee-jerk-shut-down-processing reaction as soon as I heard the word tithe. After I managed to get my faculties back I thought, hey! That blog thing! Lots of people could weigh in, offer new and different perspectives that might help me process better! And since we didn't meet last week... I can hijack the post with no problem! So, here goes, and please leave your comments! (You can do it anonymously.)

Stewardship, giving, tithing - those are uncomfortable words for most people. I couldn't help but wonder why? We all know the economy is bad, making it difficult to support anything outside your family. It seems that "the church" doesn't consider giving to other charitable organizations part of the "tithe", and how do you factor in time and talent for those of us who are short on cash? There are so many demands on my resources that I know I am more disposed to give to those causes that are flexible, and appreciate whatever I can give, no matter how small. That led me to think about why I give at all.

I did a little (and I do mean little) research into the reasons behind why people give. One article I read cited five reasons: commitment or obligation (because God said so); compassion (giving from the heart to make a specific difference); community (support of the people doing the work of the church, friends); challenge (goal-oriented campaigns, think thermometer on the wall); critical (believe their investment in the church is being handled wisely). I don't know about you, but I feel like I have fallen into every one of those categories at one time or another.

As I was reading through those five reasons for giving, I could see a shift in general societal attitudes. My grandparents and parents gave because the Bible said they should, it was an obligation that they took very seriously. They did also believe that the church created and maintained compassionate programs, they felt more closely tied to their friends at church, they believed that the money was handled appropriately and also gave to above and beyond campaigns, but for the primary reason they gave was obligation.

In a transient society, where we move from one place to another community is often difficult to develop and cultivate. Challenges have become and over-used nuisance. We insist on fiscal responsibility or withhold giving. Commitment is overrated. But, specific, targeted projects with tangible results allow me to do good, but also feel good about doing good. I think this is how many in my generation and the ones that follow feel today. I am not a scholar and have no basis for those statements other than my own observation and opinion.

"In the old days" "everybody gave to their church. I use the quotation marks to make a point here. When we think about stewardship, giving and tithing we think about it from our own perspective, colored by our unique experiences. Completely normal and human. The thing is, society and the human landscape are constantly changing and I can't hold on to the way things used to be done. That doesn't mean that I have to like the way things are. But complaining that they aren't what they used to be, or that things aren't done the way they "should" be has absolutely no impact on reality. I believe that if I want to make a difference in some way I need to understand the current situation, visualize the ideal situation, and then find a relevant bridge between the two.

So, in order to understand the current situation I invite you to weigh in. Why do you give? What is your motivation?

No Meeting February 8

2011-02-08T19:30:00.000-08:00

Our fearless leader is still under the weather. We will try to put something together to carry us through to next week.

Always There

2011-01-27T05:50:00.000-08:00

Well, some things are always there, but this week we weren't. So you get a Learner, and only one Learner 's musings this week. This Learner has been having a tough time, muddling through a series of very challenging situations. The loss of a parent, the loss of a friend's child, the loss of a dear, dear aunt. Those are the big things, compounded by all the littler, normal and not-so-normal challenges of life. It has been difficult to feel...

And just when I thought the world would be gray forever more, I got a story about sunshine. I was reading daily devotionals for a sight-impaired friend and was intrigued that the one day that she wanted me to read to her called us to read Psalms 121 to begin. You see, Psalms 121 is one that her father always read to her, almost every night when she was a child. The coincidence was compounded by the fact that Psalms 121 is the reading my father requested to open my mother's funeral service. It has to do with God always keeping us, shading us from the sun and moon.

The story that accompanied the scripture compared God's presence to your shadow. It is always attached to you, whether you notice it or not. Sometimes it is long and big and impossible to miss. Sometimes it is short and small and really hard to see. Sometimes, especially when the weather is cloudy, it doesn't even appear to be with you. But it is. And so is God. I had never thought about God that way, but it strikes me now as pure genius.

Giving thanks is not something we are programmed to do. I do a pretty good job of remembering to be thankful when I receive something tangible, desired, needed. But today I am thankful that I was listening enough to hear God whispering to me, that even though I wasn't feeling it, like my shadow He is right there with me. Thank you.

The Incredulity of Rembrandt

2011-01-20T11:20:00.000-08:00

What study of art would be complete without including Rembrandt? And yes, I did purposely play on the title of the work from last week. The paintings we focused on this week were Self Portrait as the Apostle Paul and The Return of the Prodigal Son. The question of the week - Can God really use someone like me? Good question, but we had a hard time getting there. I think we were all preoccupied a bit with the forecast and with good reason. Unofficial reports are around nine inches of snow today.

We started out with an exercise about change. Maybe you have seen those puzzles before - change Cold into its opposite Warm by changing one letter at a time, each step of the way has to be a real word, not nonsense. And then change Dead to Live. We weren't so good at this kind of puzzle which actually emphasized the point of the exercise - change is difficult. But what does that have to do with God using us?

The next step was to consider broken New Year's resolutions, characteristics of our parents that we are noticing we now have, promises that others have broken. Bring to your mind a very real and personal example that you can use to consider whether or not true change is possible. Is it really possible to change - yourself or someone else? There are a lot of impediments to change and it is incredibly difficult. Do you believe it can really be done? Can God do it?

We looked at the self-portrait first, and questioned why Rembrandt chose the Apostle Paul? We used Acts 22:2-21, Philippians 3:4-11 and 1 Timothy 1:12-14 to remind us of the life of Paul, and we came up with a biographical list:
Saul, the Persecutor
The Road to Damascus - Light
Blindness
Healing/Baptism
Another Voice (Commission)
Another Persecution
Confidence In His Heritage
Greatness in Christ's Likeness
Faithful Servant Even Though Had Been Persecutor
Then we were asked to read Acts 22:6 again and reconsider the portrait.⁶ “As I was on the road, approaching Damascus about noon, a very bright light from heaven suddenly shone down around me." (New Living Translation)

When we went back to the portrait we saw the light of Paul, but also the look of incredulity on Rembrandt's face. Rembrandt, like Paul, had experienced loss and hard times and yet, in trials they both turned to God. Difficulty strengthened their relationship with God. They didn't feel worthy, they weren't living "godly" lives, they didn't fit the mold of what a follower or agent of God "should" be. And yet God met them where they were, as they were. God changed them and they followed.

We then looked at the Prodigal Son. The use of light highlights the calm, serene acceptance of a father whose suffering and age are apparent in his arthritic hands. The contrast of the poverty of the son's condition is stark, and yet he is enfolded in his father's loving arms. There are attendants, perhaps one is the son who did what he "should", who look on in a very intimate setting. No matter their position or standing, if they choose to enter in to relationship with the father, he accepts them lovingly.

Like the Prodigal Son, neither Paul nor Rembrandt seem to have considered themselves worthy of God's love. And like the prodigal, they didn't question the invitation for long and accepted God's love and call on their lives. Can God do the same for me? Can God use me was the question for this lesson. It seems to me that the real question is will I allow God to change me and use me?

Caravaggio's Doubt

2011-01-13T05:22:00.000-08:00

Our artist this week was Caravaggio and the works we focused on were The Incredulity of Thomas and The Taking of Christ. The question we were asked to consider is the interrelation of belief, doubt and disbelief. We started out with some questions designed to develop concrete, usable examples that would be personal and specific. Something I believed in but now I disbelieve is... Something I could not believe at first but found to be true is... Something I would like to believe in but still have reservations about is... We came up with some good examples, both from secular lives and our faith lives that laid a foundation for discussion..

The paintings we looked at were commissioned by the Catholic church, to teach the people about Bible stories. Most paintings of the time are very different, idealized, mystical. Caravaggio mastered chiaroscuro (literally light-dark) and used it to emphasize the stark reality and desperate intensity of each of the scenes he painted. He used the common people with whom he lived as his models rather than his wealthy patrons. The lighting draws your attention to Jesus and the faces of the others in the paintings. Everything about the way these scenes were painted says that Caravaggio believed that they were real, gritty happenings and that the people involved were earthy and robust, not the angelic wisps we see in other works. That would speak to the masses who couldn't read and depended on the paintings for their learning, but I'm not so sure how they would be received by those who commissioned them.

And yet, the real people, the tax collectors, peasants, women at the well travelers on the road, those are the people with whom Jesus spent the majority of his time on Earth. That is also the company Caravaggio kept, and for the most part they were his target audience. So what is his interpretation of the event depicted in The Incredulity of Thomas? What does Caravaggio say about the doubt of Thomas?

I think we struggled a little with the printed copies, they were too dark to make out some of the vital details. Our discussion included some great points, especially that Thomas was only asking for what had already been granted to all the other Disciples. They had all seen the risen Christ, Thomas was the only one left out. Have you ever felt like that? I know I have, and doggone it, be fair! Right?! Well, Jesus was fair. He guides Thomas' finger to the wound on his side with an intimate, inviting, accepting visage. Thomas appears to be somewhat horrified and almost regretful that he had insisted on seeing Jesus and feeling the wound. His eyes looking straight ahead, not at the action, not at his hand being guided into Christ's side. Others crowd around, wanting to see what is happening. It is a very intimate encounter that clearly says Jesus accepts and welcomes the doubt.

That leads us back to the original question - what is the relationship between belief, disbelief and doubt? No one wants to admit to having doubts at church, that makes you a bad Christian. We must have felt that because we skirted that conversation and quoted verses that would prove we are good Christians. One of the verses was Hebrews 11:1 (CEV) "Faith makes us sure of what we hope for and gives us proof of what we cannot see." While that may be true, it is hollow and empty for those of us who do not feel that. Words alone are not going to help those of us who doubt.

In the painting Jesus uses Thomas' doubt in a real-life, concrete experience to lead him (and us) to belief. Therein lies the relationship that we came to in our discussion. Doubt is the bridge between disbelief and belief, and between belief and disbelief. Without doubt there is no agent to move you from one to the other. So the question for me becomes, why are we so uncomfortable with doubt, avoiding it at all cost?

We didn't have a whole lot of time to look at the scripture because the discussion was so lively, but I have gone back to look at the recommended passages from John: 1:3-9; 3:16-21; 5:31-40; 8:12-18. They all deal with God bringing/sending light into a dark world. The difference between the light(belief) and the dark(disbelief) is the action of God and acceptance and participation of the people(doubt). I'm left wondering if maybe we shouldn't be embracing and encouraging doubt as a process that explores and deepens faith, rather than seeing it as weakness and a sign of infidelity?

Vincent's Hope

2011-01-06T05:36:00.000-08:00

We started a new year with a new study - God's Word on Canvas. This study uses classic artwork about the Bible to inspire discussion and examination of the Bible. Our work this week is Vincent Van Gogh's Still Life With Bible, 1885 and the question is, is there any reason for hope?

The still life depicts a Bible open to Isaiah 53 with a well-used, unlit candle behind it. In front of the Bible, lying closed on the table, is a copy of Emile Zola's La Joie de Vivre. The light in the picture is quite interesting, being brightest on Zola's book, but the source of the light is undetermined. After considering the picture and some of Van Gogh's later works we discussed what the artist was trying to say, and what the picture says to us.

It helps me to know that this was an early painting, completed shortly after the death of Van Gogh's father. Vincent had tried several jobs, including clergy like his father, but his father considered him a failure. Van Gogh was very fond of the literature of his day and considered Zola's work to be a Bible for modern life. La Joie de Vivre - literally The Joy of Life - is a story about the Christ-like figure Pauline Quenu, an orphan who is mistreated and robbed of her inheritance by the family who takes her in. Throughout all her travails and loss she remains optimistic and a servant to the poor.

So the question asks us to consider, after reading Isaiah 53, if there is reason for hope in a servant-king. Why does Pauline continue to hope? Why do other Christ-like figures hope - Jean Valjean in Les Miserables, Vianne in Chocolat, Aslan in The Chronicles of Narnia, John Coffey in The Green Mile, Gandlaf, Optimus Prime, Spock, Cool Hand Luke? Why do we continue to hope?

I think we settled on the idea that hope is an innate longing in all humans. We all believe that life, things, can be different (and by different we mean better) than they are right now. But we decided that there is a difference for Christians. As people we often pin our hopes on our own abilities, the abilities of others, our personal strength, wealth. But as Christians we can also put our hope in the servant-king foretold in Isaiah 53.

Our group agreed that there is always reason for hope, it just isn't always easy to feel that hope. Even though we believe that God will make up the difference for us between what we feel and what we need in order to get through difficult times and trials, it is sometimes really hard to feel that, deep in our souls, in the very pit of our stomachs. Do Christians have a corner on the hope market? I don't think so. And I don't think Vincent felt that either. The message of the still life for me is that the Bible is always there, unchanging, but the way it speaks to us needs to change, to be relevant to the times. For Vincent Van Gogh the hope of Isaiah 53 didn't have much meaning because it was colored and overshadowed by the poor relationship he had with his minister father. The candle is out, the words on the page are illegible, but the Bible is still there and open. La Joie de Vivre, although closed, basks in and also seems to reflect the light. Vincent was able to find hope in Zola's work, in the idea of a life of servant-hood, caring for others. As Christians, our hope in God is without limitation, if we can only feel and trust it.

Yin and Yang

2010-12-28T05:38:00.000-08:00

We did not meet this week, so I choose to reflect on the one of the ideas in the last couple of posts. I have been pondering the question of whether or not we can fully choose God if we don't fully know "not-God." And can you equate the questioning or not feeling the holiday spirit the same as experiencing "not-God?"

I confess I have no deep understanding of the oriental concept of yin and yang, just a basic comprehension that they represent two opposing forces in creation that need each other in order to remain in balance. I have been thinking about this idea in relation to the words from one of my favorite singer-songwriters, Javier Mendoza. On his new CD's - one CD, actually, released simultaneously in English and Spanish - he writes in the song "Everything Changes" that "no hay Dios sin mal," or "you know God needs sin." That reminded me of some of our earlier conversations about evil simply being the absence of God, or choosing "not-God." It seems to me that in our theology there is an underlying but unarticulated need for that same balance. I wonder why we don't really address or name that?

So what do you think? Is the absence of God the same thing as evil? And do we need both forces in tension in order to maintain a cosmic balance? Do we have to experience "not-God" in order to fully choose God? I am still pondering...

Sharing in the Wilderness

2010-12-22T07:24:00.000-08:00

We will not be meeting tonight, so I thought I would take this opportunity to relate my own story of sharing in the wilderness. Last week I posted the idea that maybe we need to be in the wilderness in order to solidify and develop our own faith. Maybe it is not only OK, but necessary to feel alone, sad, barren - sometimes. Many of you know that this Learner recently lost my mother, and I have felt like I was in the desert for a couple of months now. I don't feel the joy, the reason for the season. In fact, I have been feeling very little lately. Just when I start to feel something again life throws me another knuckle-ball that makes it easier to retreat into the Cave of Solitude to wallow in guilt and petulance.

Even though I would prefer to hibernate in my cave, I have kept up with my routines for the most part, and one of them is going to the gym on a daily basis. I go early, as does a core group of "regulars." We know each others' faces and first names, but not much more. We sometimes have passing conversations but nothing deep and nothing that would really identify who we are. Still, there is a tight cohesiveness about the camaraderie born of the hour we choose. One of our regulars has been missing since about September and while I wondered why, I didn't really know enough to investigate. It was just one of life's mysteries that I allowed to simply be.

Our missing member returned recently, irregularly but often enough to be considered "back" in my mind. One morning our routines crossed in such a way that we had the opportunity to talk, to say more than just good morning as we made our way to the next machine. I discovered that not only had they lost their own mother in September, their father was declining, rapidly. We had a chat, I shared my own loss, we both teared up, completely understanding how the other felt without having to verbalize any more. We were both living in the wilderness, but it felt really good to know we were not alone.

That brought me back to Paul's second letter to the Corinthians, something I remembered only because we just studied it not too long ago. In verses 1:3-4 from The Message Paul says,

All praise to the God and Father of our Master, Jesus the Messiah! Father of all mercy! God of all healing counsel! He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us.

I couldn't help but wonder and feel like that is exactly what happened for me and my friend. We were both feeling lost, alone, guilty at not being as joyous as we should, guilty for being a bit of the Grinch that some of my compatriots had complained about last week. When we had that opportune moment, provided serendipitously, we each took advantage of it and I think we both found some small comfort in each others' sharing company.

So what is my point in relating all this sadness in a season of joy? If you are feeling like you are in the wilderness, then feel it. Don't be guilty because you aren't deliriously happy about the gift of Jesus. If you are deliriously happy about Christmas, don't begrudge me my Grinchiness. Consider the possibility that I need to be Grinchy. We are each on our own faith journey, and each of our experiences can help to shape and deepen our faith if we allow it. I think the BIG lesson for me has been that I need to feel and use each emotion and experience, and remain open to God, to look and listen for the meaning. Even when I would rather hibernate in a cave.

Making It About Me

2010-12-17T05:41:00.000-08:00

Here it is, Friday morning, and I am really regretting not having written this sooner. Part of it was work, part of it was errands (including groceries for the college kids who are coming home), and part of it was I'm just not feeling "it" this year. So to sit down and discuss the interweaving of the themes of light, fulfillment and joy in the different versions of the birth story just felt too happy and centered and celebratory for me. At least for the last day or two. I am doing my best to be faithful to our discussion and hope I reflect the light-fulfillment-joy theme as well as the meditation from Barbara Brown Taylor on the Gospel of Mark and the coming of John the Baptist, the voice in the wilderness.

Surely our understood stories of the birth and the actual accounts in the Bible chronicle over and over Jesus as light, as the fulfillment of prophecy and God's promises, and as the joy of Heaven and Earth at His birth. If you consider the event in context you have to wonder really, what value is there in Jesus' birth? From our perspective 2,000 years later we have a pretty good idea of how things are going to turn out, but the shepherds, the wise men, the others who came to worship, they only had what the angels told them and the prophecies to fall back on. It would appear that each one of them felt that Jesus was being born for them, personally and individually, not for "the people." They didn't just know it, they felt it, clearly and deeply.

That led us to a discussion of how difficult it can be to avoid the commercialization of Christmas and remain focused on the celebration of Jesus' birth. It can be really hard to be joyful when you are surrounded by Grinches. But as one of our members very astutely pointed out, you have to know that Jesus came for you personally - just as the shepherds and others did so long ago. You have to egocentrically internalize that knowledge so that you don't just know it, you feel it. Sounds right, but it seems to me that this kind of "selfish" attitude is in direct opposition to both the religious and secular focus on reaching out and selflessly helping others at this time of the year. You want to be selfish and think about Jesus coming just for you?! Well, go ahead, but guess where you are going?!

Then we moved on to the essay on the message of John the Baptist, that we all need to start over again with this birth, be washed clean, and pay attention to the thing that God was going to do right in front of us. John was nowhere near a church, and indeed the people who clung to the familiar and stayed in the church never heard his message. Can that happen to us? Do we get so caught up in maintaining the "form" of worship that we forget the "function"? And are the wilderness and the light mutually exclusive? I think there is light in the wilderness, and sometimes we need to go to a barren spiritual place in order to be able to see the light. Maybe it is OK to be in the wilderness, even at this joyous time of the year. And maybe it is OK to not feel that joy or believe in the way that others would have us believe. And maybe, just maybe, being in the wilderness is a part of our spiritual journey that will not only lead us, but force us to make the celebration about us, about the very personal gift that is just for me.

Health for All

2010-12-09T19:11:00.000-08:00

Most of you know already, we didn't meet this week because our leader was sick. In this cold and flu season it seems appropriate to ask for prayers for health for all of us!

Who Are You?

2010-12-02T19:19:00.000-08:00

Who are you? How would you answer if someone asked you that question? I would describe myself, my work, but the majority of my answer would probably have to do with my family, past and present.

Why do people today track their genealogy? Some of the reasons include that it provides a connection or sense of belonging; it allows the passing on of history; it gives us a context in which to understand the world; it is an inter-generational activity, that builds cohesive families; it provides a means of preserving tradition and culture; it provides a legacy to pass on to future generations; it provides a sense of identity. It seems to me that Matthew and Luke accomplished all of those things and more in the few verses used to list the genealogy of Jesus.

In some ways the genealogies of Jesus in Matthew and Luke are an exercise in compare and contrast. They draw parallels between Moses and Jesus - Herod/Pharaoh killing all the baby boys, families going to extraordinary lengths to protect their sons, both would deliver their people from slavery and the powers of evil. Then there is the contrast between Matthew and Luke, the way they tell the story. Matthew starts with Abraham and lists each person by name, Luke starts with Jesus and works back, listing each as the son of _____. Matthew includes the Sermon on the Mount, echoing Moses receiving the Law, while Luke includes the Sermon on the Plain. Matthew writes from a male (Joseph) perspective, Luke from a female (Mary). Surprisingly, neither genealogy includes Moses or Joseph, two great heroes of the Old Testament. It seems pretty clear, though, that both are tying Jesus back to the source of the original covenant, to Abraham and to God, in order to refute the Roman claims that Caesar was the son of God.

I found our discussion of the structural messages really intriguing. For instance, Matthew groups his genealogy into three sections of fourteen "generations" each. I decided to do a quick Google search for the significance of numbers in the Bible, and found surprising agreement on what each number represents. Fourteen is a doubly strong (7) spiritual perfection and completeness, and three has to do with viewing things in their entirety, complete and solid. Can you then interpret that genealogical listing as being spiritually stronger, more complete and whole than anything Caesar could post?

There are a lot of fives in Matthew. He mentions Jesus as Messiah five times. There are five women named in the genealogy, the fifth being Mary. There are five dreams and five prophetic fulfillments in chapters one and two. All of the restating and expansion of the Ten Commandments is found in the fifth chapter of Matthew. And just what does the number five represent? Grace, favor.

Matthew and Luke told their audiences exactly who Jesus was, in terms that they would understand and comprehend in ways that are lost on us. Both versions include people who send the unspoken message that God is intentional in acting, things will be accomplished in God's time, God uses everyone in accomplishing His purposes and invites everyone into relationship. Maybe I won't sleep through the next genealogy.

An Attitude of Grattitude

2010-11-26T06:04:00.000-08:00

I have some friends who have been writing a thankful note every day. Each day they note one thing for which they are thankful. Sounds easy. I thought it was a great idea when I first saw it and decided to try it myself. It is actually quite a bit more difficult for me than I anticipated. Although I am having trouble putting it into practice, I was successful on Wednesday. The car that I just got back from $1,000 worth of suspension and fuel system repairs had the windshield wiper motor explode as I was driving in a torrential downpour. I was on familiar streets, not far from home, and not behind a semi on the interstate on the way to visit my kids. I tried to be happy and thankful about that, I really did!

In contrast to the gratitude notes, I recently received a holiday update letter that was brutally honest about the writer's current difficulty dealing with the sudden and relatively recent loss of their father. Going through that first year of loss is really difficult, but how much is that compounded by the expectation that we experience joy in the coming holiday season? Do we add guilt to the list because we can't feel the way the media tells us we are supposed to feel? I know I have been adding some guilt to my plate about my inability to be as joyfully thankful as my friends.

And that carried me back to some previous discussions we have had. I think it was when we were studying Job and we landed on the thought that God wants us to be honest in our relationship with him, and by extension in our relationships with others. So in this season of joy and thankfulness, when I come across someone who isn't quite up to the perfect image we have created, I intend to do my best to make them feel good about feeling what they feel. And I think I will include myself, and work at reaching an Attitude of Gratitude while I honestly deal with what I am actually feeling, even if it isn't what it is "supposed" to be.

He Said, He Said

2010-11-18T05:22:00.000-08:00

First off, housekeeping business. We will NOT meet next week, November 24, but we WILL meet the following week, December 1, at our regular time, 5:30 pm.

This week we began a study of the Christmas story by looking at the facts, ma'am, just the facts. Matthew and Luke. It was an exercise in compare and contrast, starting with each of our own first memories of learning the birth story. We found that no matter our background or upbringing, to some degree or another our understanding of the birth story is a synthesis of the things we learned from the Bible, church, our families, and the things we learned from society. You know what I mean, the movies, the creche, A Charlie Brown Christmas. It is convenient how we are able to assemble all of those inputs to a single, coherent story.

But what about those facts? We read the story in Matthew and Luke, and some of the things that stood out for us were:
---Luke includes the birth of John and his parents, while Matthew does not;
---Joseph is the main character in Matthew, he is missing in Luke
---Mary is prominent in Luke's story, absent in Matthew's
---Luke includes hymns, The Annunciation, The Magnificat,The Benedictus
---Matthew does not mention angels, shepherds, manger, all the conditions that would indicate a "low" birth, they are found in Luke

Those are just a few things we talked about. Maybe the more important question is not what is different, but why? We need to consider the audience to whom each was writing. Matthew's concern was to link the birth of Jesus to the Jewish tradition and prophecies, he was a Jew writing for Jews. His audience already knew what to expect, and they expected a military king, preceded by the return of Elijah, who would lead them in overthrowing the Romans. Matthew had to show them that even though Jesus was not the warrior they expected, he was the fulfillment of the prophecies.

Luke, on the other hand, is traditionally considered to be a gentile writing for gentiles, and what better way to show "outsiders" that they ARE included in the kingdom of God than to show how very many outsiders had principal roles in the birth of Jesus. The shepherds, the conditions, the animals, the WOMEN. Not only are women prominent players, they are named! Elizabeth, Mary, Anna. Think about what kind of message that sent to the people in a society where women were little more than property. What would that say to you, as a gentile man, about your inclusion in the ministry of Jesus? Yeah, that's right. We're all in, if we want to be in. Luke also needs to fill in the holes of their knowledge of the Old Testament. For instance, he includes the birth of John the Baptizer to teach them about prophecy regarding the return of Elijah before the Messiah.

If I think about why the stories are different, not just the differences, I come back to a comforting thought for me. I have said before that my God is a God of change. God continually changes the way He speaks to us, reaches out to us, invites us into relationship. It is always contextual and appropriate to the times and society. So even though I would really like a burning bush to tell me what to do, I'm probably not going to get that. Matthew and Luke telling "different" stories - that is, different details about the same basic story - broaden the audience and invite more people into the circle of friends. The Bible tells me that God will reach out to me, I just need to be watching and open to it coming in a different form than I expect.

The Questions That Never Go Away

2010-11-11T15:17:00.000-08:00

Next week we will start looking at the Christmas story. This was our last session on the Bible that Jesus read, and while I have to confess I have found this study a bit... tedious at times... I was surprised to find that I really didn't want to wrap it up. I didn't clearly comprehend until now exactly how real the Old Testament is. Yancey says that it "...represents the whole gamut of human responses to God." Even the negative ones that we "shouldn't" have. Now that is something I can relate to!

Think about it. How many places in the New Testament do you find doubt, struggles, despair, questioning God? They just aren't there. So what do you do with those emotions when you feel them? Isn't the subtext of their omission from the New Testament that 1.) Jesus came to save us all; 2.) Jesus' death atones for our sins and offers us unbounded hope of salvation; 3.) If your faith were strong enough you wouldn't feel those emotions? So now, because I do feel that way, I am bad, not a Christian. OK, I agree, it is a leap, but not that big a leap to get there.

Our Fearless Leader asked us to complete an exercise, and I just wasn't up to participating last night. She asked us to rewrite Psalm 13 in our own words and to fit our own situation. Here is the Psalm as it appears in The Message:

1-2 Long enough, God— you've ignored me long enough.
I've looked at the back of your head
long enough. Long enough
I've carried this ton of trouble,
lived with a stomach full of pain.
Long enough my arrogant enemies
have looked down their noses at me.

3-4 Take a good look at me, GOD, my God;
I want to look life in the eye,
So no enemy can get the best of me
or laugh when I fall on my face.

5-6 I've thrown myself headlong into your arms—
I'm celebrating your rescue.
I'm singing at the top of my lungs,
I'm so full of answered prayers.

The psalmist records those negative but very real and very human emotions. In hindsight I think it was a good idea to rewrite it and I wish I had done it, but I guess that ship has sailed. Why don't you try it?

I think we can close this one with a quote from the end of the book, one of the few from Yancey that I really liked.

“I have learned to love the Old Testament because it so poignantly expresses my own inner longings. I find in it a realism about human nature that is sorely absent from much smiley-faced Christian propaganda. And yet the Old Testament writers, especially the psalmists and prophets eagerly point ahead to a time when God has vowed to address those longings, to answer the questions that never go away.” -- Phillip Yancey

"I-ah, I-ah, Oh!"

2010-11-04T05:17:00.000-07:00

A little hard to get it, but the title is a take-off on the refrain from Old MacDonald. This week we took a look at the prophets, and started by naming them. Of course we got most of the "iah's" - Jeremiah, Isaiah, Nehemiah, Obadiah. We considered the question of why the prophets are often overlooked, and while we had some ideas we also learned from our Fearless Leader and the video that although we tend to read the prophets as narrative, they are not. The books are considered to be edited compilations of bits and pieces. They are also very contextual, you need to know the state of affairs of the day in order to understand exactly what they are addressing. There is also the issue of code, like in Revelation. Often speaking to give hope to captive and exiled peoples, the prophets use key words and phrases that would have had deep meaning for their contemporaries but are often lost on the casual reader (like me!). No wonder we tend to skip over them!

Yancey suggests you get some background to understand the context and then search through to find the bits and pieces that apply to your current situation. He believes that the prophets reveal the nature and personality of God. Something like the way the parables reveal the kingdom of God. It isn't always about the black and white words on the page. It helps to think about the books being written down as history, understanding that as all humans do they were trying to make sense out of bad times, trying to find and define where God is in the midst of terrible situations. Sound familiar?

One of the final questions we considered was are there prophets today? I think we all jumped to say yes, because that is what you are supposed to say, right? But then when asked to name them we had some difficulty. We came up with ideas like Billy Graham, Martin Luther King, Jr., famous and well known people. But we were pushed to think about people like the prophets. Not that anyone is going around naked for three years to make a point - like Isaiah did - but common, everyday people, your friends and neighbors. Isn't that who God called in the Old Testament? Shepherds, well-to-do, people from all walks of life. If you consider that prophets are messengers of God, calling on Israel and Judah in the Old Testament (or us, today) to remember and keep their (our) covenant with God, then who is your prophet?

We have one more session left on the Old Testament, and then we will begin taking a look at the Christmas story from all the different perspectives. Come join us on Wednesday evenings!

To Everything There is a Season

2010-10-22T06:02:00.000-07:00

This week we looked at the book of Ecclesiastes. I'm sure many of us remember the Byrds' 1965 song based on Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, but that song doesn't fully convey the negativity of the rest of the book. Ecclesiastes has been called a hymn to meaninglessness. Chapter one closes with verse 18 (The Message): "Much learning earns you much trouble, the more you know, the more you hurt." What a depressing view. Nothing in this life matters, so should you enjoy it while you can, or should you deny this world and focus on the next? Seems to me that is the $64,000 question and yet another dichotomy.

Ecclesiastes echos and reinforces some of the themes we have seen in other books. There is no value in material things, life is not always sunshine and roses, prosperity is more dangerous and detrimental to our relationship with God than hard times. We continue on, trying to determine, define, delineate exactly what gives our lives meaning. Ecclesiastes does a really good job of telling us what does NOT give our lives meaning, but we are left to figure out what the positive definition is on our own.

The human quest is to understand - to fully comprehend - how to live our lives with meaning. It is clear from Ecclesiastes and the other books we have studied that it isn't about the material things of this world. And now we find it isn't even about knowledge and wisdom. So what is it about then? Man, just tell me what to do and I will do it! Please!

Oh JM, I see it again. "The destination is in the journey." Having instructions on how to live our lives with meaning makes it about the destination. The message I keep hearing in all the books we have looked at is that it is about the journey. What is important is to want to be in relationship with God. That said, it appears it is important to be authentic and honest in our relationship as well.

None of the books has said it outright, but the pessimistic tone and questions tell me that it is OK to be angry, to question, to be in despair. Those are natural human emotions that are a part of any relationship. God accepts that about us, and is big enough to take it when we have those negative feelings. I don't think we really accept or acknowledge negative feelings when it comes to God. I wrote some time ago about the case against "should", and here is another "should" that I challenge. I always feel the message from "church," and by "church" I mean organized religion of any stripe or color, is that we "should" never be angry or weak in our faith. From there you move on to the next step, if you are angry with God, or don't believe as strongly or in the way that you "should," then God will allow some bad thing to happen to you or leave you or punish you. Another "should."

I choose to hang on to my new understanding that God wants me to be angry and question and doubt. The Israelites in the desert, focused on survival, remembered God a lot more faithfully than they did after they crossed into the Promised Land. When I go through bad times they have the potential to strengthen and deepen my faith. I recently borrowed a line from "Bruce Almighty" and found myself tempting the Mighty Smiter to smite me. After it was out I felt better and was able to work through those bad feelings. And eventually I was able to see and feel good in the midst of a very bad situation. I simply need to be willing to continue on the journey of exploration and relationship and not look for the destination.

Taking This Week Off

2010-10-15T09:17:00.000-07:00

I am out of pocket this week, but if someone sends me a summary I will get it posted for sure!

Remember... Faithfulness

2010-10-07T16:48:00.000-07:00

I confess that when I learned the topic of study would be the Old Testament I was less than enthused. But as we go farther in to the study, the more I am enjoying it and getting a completely different perspective on that stern, demanding, vengeful God of the Old Testament that I remember from the Sunday School stories. He really isn't all that bad! I am beginning to see God more as an exasperated parent who is constantly disappointed by disobedient, wayward children than as a lightning-bolt wielding, angry, punishing authoritarian.

Deuteronomy chronicles the passage of Israel into the Promised Land after spending forty years on what should have been a couple of week's journey. Why did they have to spend so long in the desert? Was it because they weren't faithful to God and the commandments? Last week, in Job, we talked about being in relationship with God because it was right, because we choose God, not because we follow the rules or because of the rewards and blessings we would get.

In the bad times, the difficult times, we naturally turn to God and ask for help. Don't you find yourself praying a lot more when you are troubled, when you need something? I know I do. But when times are good and prosperous, our human nature leads us to think we are responsible for our own success. We forget about God's role in our lives. In making the transition from totally controlled slaves to a free society, that wandering coalesced the Jews into a coherent, interdependent society.

And yet, Moses still fears for Israel. Any parent can probably appreciate how hard he worked to bring the people safely to the Promised Land, to get them to be the obedient society God wants them to be. He has seen them be disobedient despite repeated warnings from himself and directly from God. Deuteronomy is actually three speeches by Moses, his warning, urging and farewell. It is a very parental and loving act, and Moses, who did everything God asked of him, serves as the ultimate example of faithfulness. In spite of everything he did, he did not cross the Jordan - alive. He did it because he loved God, because it was right.

In a society where history is oral, carried through the generations by story, song and poetry, the people need an oration to repeat and teach to their children. The first speech has been described as a "state of the union", a reminder of what God has done for them. In the second Moses urges Israel to remember exactly what God expects of them, restating the laws and the Commandments. Moses must hope that they will remember, even in prosperity, and remain faithful to God. And finally, in parting, Moses reminds them of what God will do, of how God keeps his covenant. God is faithful even when they are not.

If you look at the rest of history in that context, you can see how in the bad times we coalesce and are bound together by common goals. Although I didn't live through it, I imagine that was how it felt during times like the Great Depression and World War II. Those tough times were followed by a lengthy period of relative peace and prosperity, at least in this country, and I suggest that we have lost our devotion and faithfulness. Maybe it is time to remember, to redefine acceptable boundaries, to be faithful, to choose God.

The Patience of Job...Or The Questions of Job

2010-09-30T05:23:00.000-07:00

This week's lead off question is to name a phrase or word that you associate with the book of Job. Our answers included testing, comforters, asking and asking, faith, faithful, learning to live with the questions. I couldn't help but wonder where were anger, indignation, frustration, all those other negative emotions that we aren't "supposed" to name. All those very normal, human emotions that come up especially when bad things happen to good people.

Wouldn't it be great if we could make sense of things that make no sense. If we could identify a pattern of behavior that would keep us safe, immune from bad things. If you do X(go to church) then you will never face Y(God will keep you safe). That is actually the "Enemy's" argument throughout the book. Satan's position is that man (Job) only loves God because of the blessings he gets from God. As soon as the blessing disappear and something bad happens then man will abandon faith in God because God is not worthy of love in and of himself, and humans are not free to believe, faith is just a product of the environment and circumstances.

Well, the book of Job pretty much refutes that argument, doesn't it? Job has faith beyond understanding, until of course we find ourselves in a bad situation. Sometimes I think faith is like insurance or AAA. You never really know how good your coverage is and what it really means until you have to use it. And you really hope you don't have to find out how good it is. When everything is going well you can think you have deep faith and are faithful, but it is times of trial when we fully comprehend the depth of our faith.

So then, what is the point of the book? God wants us to be in faithful relationship with Him, and has given us the freedom to choose that. We choose relationship, behaviors, our responses to bad things. It doesn't matter if we get angry with God, yell at God, question God incessantly. There are plenty of examples of people doing that. What does matter is that we are honest and authentic and choose relationship. God will meet us where we are, even if we are hiding behind a wall of our own making.

Getting the Whole Story

2010-09-27T05:26:00.000-07:00

First of all, sorry to be so late in making this post. I think the new format, the new time, and a case of "the-can't-helpits" have all conspired to reinforce and validate my procrastination. Guess I just need to jump in and get it done.

We started out this week by answering this question: What is a short phrase or word that you would use to describe the God of the Old Testament. For me, the first thing that popped into my head was hell-fire-and-brimstone. Some of the others included second chances, forceful, stern, demanding, commandment, militaristic. What would your word be? Does it fall into this same general theme? This has always been a problem for me, how do you reconcile the fearsome, demanding, punishing God of the Old Testament with the God of the New Testament who is all about love and forgiveness? I arrived at a reasonable explanation for myself, but this week I got a new perspective that confirmed and expanded my reconciliation of those images. (Love it when that happens and I don't have to start over again!)

Yancey proposes we look at the entirety of the Bible as one, long, on-going story. Of course, that isn't really the way we learn it, is it? Bits and pieces, stories about individuals, vignettes, parables, but not one long continuous story. And if you do look at it that way what is the plot? Simply stated, God creates the world, the world gets lost, God restores the world. Over and over and over again. There is this dichotomy, ebb and flow, yin and yang, God and not-God. Yancey lays it out in a pretty nice chart (I tend to be visual). In the beginning there is the Garden, then that goes downhill pretty fast. Then you rise intop the Patriarchal Age (Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph) and as they descend into "badness" you have they Sojourn in Egypt. Next comes the Exodus and Conquest, Period of the Judges, United Kingdom, Divided Kingdom, Assyrian and Babylonian exiles, the Prophets. I guess you can see it as a rise and fall of civilization.

The one thing that God always asks for, or demands, is for us to choose obedience and relationship with God. Is that why the opposite must exist? So we can make a fully-informed decision to follow God and God's law? And why is that free will choice so important? If we make a fully informed choice doesn't that make us more like God and less like human, imperfect beings? Is it part of the journey, moving us along the continuum? It seems I am left with more questions than when we started...

In closing we considered another question: What new things are you seeing in the Old Testament that you have not seen before? Our answers included free will, God demanding obedience (even in the Garden), man (I) still has a choice, and the infinite patience of God. And all of this dovetails nicely with my own personal belief that God speaks to us in the form most appropriate for our situation and experience. In the Old Testament, in a society concerned with survival God is a "hard task master" in order to protect God's people and bring them together into a cohesive society. In the New Testament love and acceptance is necessary to bring together people from many different backgrounds and traditions into a single, cohesive unit. God gives to and demands from each in the way that they each need. Hopefully that applies to us as individuals too.

A New Beginning with the Old Testament

2010-09-20T10:50:00.000-07:00

How many of you like puzzles? I really like the challenge of a good puzzle. I have a strong appreciation for the little discoveries you can make along the way as you connect the pieces to create a more unified whole. This analogy can also be applied to our current Bible study. Most of us read the Bible in bits and pieces. We glimpse the pieces in worship, Sunday School, Bible studies and the occasional devotional. Rarely do we have an opportunity to deliberately put the pieces together. Our group on Wednesday night talked about the ways the image of God was similar and different from the Old Testament to the New Testament. One thing remained clear. God wants desperately to be in relationship with humanity and will go to great lengths to continue that relationship, even in the midst of disobedience, rebellion and sometimes rejection. There are truths that God wants us to know about Godself, life, and ourselves in general. These truths are lived out in the narratives of the Old Testament and then ultimately embodied through his son Jesus Christ. These truths are not disconnected between the Old Testament and the New Testament. Jesus didn't have Paul's Epistles or the Gospels. Jesus used the Psalms, the Prophets, and the books of Moses. That's where he believed his relationship with God the Father was formed and these truths are the basis of all that Jesus taught and embodied.

Transitions

2010-09-11T06:24:00.000-07:00

Some of you know this has been a transitional year for us in a lot of ways. Our oldest child graduated in December so she has been transitioning to the adult world. (Quite successfully, I might add!) Our middle child is becoming a "larger" person after studying abroad this summer and learning a whole lot about human nature from her new job - waiting tables. Our youngest went to college this fall so we are adjusting to being a couple again. Part of that adjustment for us is going out and having date nights again. I know, something we should have been doing all along but there was never time, money, babysitters,... whatever the excuse we just didn't do it.

One thing that I have really enjoyed is going out with new people to listen to some really good music, mostly struggling independent musicians. We had a wonderful time one evening this summer with a group of four families, having dinner at a nice restaurant downtown and then a concert at an intimate yet ornate theater. It was so enjoyable talking with the folks who were there, such nice, down to earth people. It was also clear from our short time together that each individual family unit was very tight-knit and loving. We had a great time and I was making that little check in the back of my mind, if we ever have the chance to do anything with them again we need to rearrange our plans to do it. It was just that much fun.

We got back into the regular patterns and ruts again, and I really didn't think about it too much until yesterday. I learned that one of the men, a husband and father and probably a little bit younger than I am, passed away this week. In hindsight I may have thought twice about the daughter who returned home from a great job in New York, but I didn't. And there were probably some other little clues too that I missed. To the casual observer, they appeared to be a loving family, having a great time, in love with life and each other.

I didn't know him or his family well at all, but it really struck me. Maybe because it forces me to confront my own mortality. Maybe because I don't want to imagine a partner leaving someone behind. Maybe because even though his children are in their late teens or early twenties, we all still want and need our dads. Maybe because it forces me to confront the same impending transition for my Mom, or maybe all those things plus a couple more just lumped together and said, "Ha! Try to stand up to us now!"

Well, here it is the next day and I am still standing. My heart is aching for his family and dear friends, who I know are missing him more than words can convey. But they are still standing too. I think it is no coincidence that the devotional I read for my blind friend yesterday had to do with God carrying us through the trials, and being strong enough to support us when we need to be weak. Yes, need. I can stand even though it feels as though my knees will buckle, and they don't. I can cry and be a mess, but still continue on with life. I think it is important to feel the pain, loss, sadness. For me it is like the choice God asks us to make in choosing him, in giving us free will. There is evil and pain and sadness in the world, some people would call that the difference between God and "Not-God." But how can we truly choose God if we don't know what "Not-God" is like? We can choose, but I believe God wants us to make a fully-informed decision.

A full life, well-lived, and faith that the Lord will care for our loved ones makes this transition much easier. Note, I didn't say easy. It is hard and sad and painful and lonely. I am feeling a bit weak today, but asking God to support me and help me carry on. When there is absolutely nothing I can do for someone, whether they are passing or being left behind, I do take some comfort in the thought that God holds the passing in his hands, and is fashioning those of us left behind into stronger, more useful people through our experiences. Now I just have to be brave enough to feel those feelings and maybe become a little bit stronger...

The Practice of Getting Lost

2010-09-07T14:04:00.000-07:00

You know, some of us really don't need any help getting lost. Others fear it more than the dentist! Getting lost in unfamiliar territory can be down right dangerous, but it can also be incredibly rewarding. Did you ever notice how much more attention you pay to little details when you are lost? I tend to hang onto them like breadcrumbs, so that if I need them they can at least help me back track.

This chapter isn't just about being physically lost in a new place, though. It talks about how you can be emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually lost as well. It seems to me that all these types of lost have a few things in common. They force you to give up control, or the illusion that you have control. They require you to rely on a force outside yourself. They push you to become more observant, living more in the moment and letting go of all those preoccupations that we carry around with us all the time.

OK, great, sounds good, even like something I truly would like to try. But where do I find the time to be a flanneur, a wanderer? Does it have to be an epic journey, and adventure worthy of recounting again and again. Or can it be as simple as pulling over to spend three minutes looking at the deer and her fawns that seem to have absolutely no fear of traffic? Or maybe just taking a different route home, even if it does add a few minutes to the commute. I'm not sure... guess I had better practice...

The Practice of Walking the Earth

2010-08-30T13:59:00.000-07:00

I think one of the things I like best about this book is the way Barbara Taylor makes the most ordinary things, things that anyone can do without any instruction, into spiritual practices. Lately my mantra has been some days are better than others, and I have been waiting fairly patiently (for me) for the better days to come along. Some days it doesn't really seem like they will, but I am trying very hard to keep the faith and hoping that trying some of these practices ... Following my very rigid nature the next practice is walking on the earth, and is introduced with a quote from Thich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese monk. "The miracle is not to walk on water but on the earth." Hmmm...

You could probably sum this chapter up by going barefoot and remembering that the destination is in the journey. By focusing on the simple act of walking, not where you have been or where you are going, but walking you can come into a greater awareness of yourself, others, the world around you, God. Taylor calls it groundedness. And each one of us has our own unique journey, colored by who we are and who we have been, so there is no recipe to be followed here with a guarantee of results. In fact, she states on page 59, "The only promise they (spiritual practices) make is to teach those who engage in them what those practitioners need to know - about being human about being human with other people, about being human in creation, about being human before God." I have to confess, I am much more comfortable with a prescribed behavior that yields consistent results. Why do I always have to give up control?

I go barefoot quite a bit, and yes, hitting that pebble on the driveway in the center of my heel does bring my mind to the present, to that very moment and that very place, but I do not really marvel at the creation of the pebble. I bet you can guess what I think about that pebble. But if I think about it, it does slow me down and sometimes I do hear the mockingbird in the tree, or see the squirrel twitching in the bush across the street, or feel the gentleness of a breeze in the midst of an oppressive St. Louis summer day. I guess focusing on the physical act can bring me more fully into where I am rather than thinking about where I am going or where I need to be.

And how does that help? I haven't quite worked that one out, but I am thinking it circles us back around to reverence and paying attention and wearing skin. I guess I need more practice of the practices...

Wearing Skin

2010-08-20T05:30:00.000-07:00

When I first read the title of this chapter - The Practice of Wearing Skin - it made me think of The Velveteen Rabbit. Maybe you remember when the Rabbit and the Skin Horse are talking about being real, about how it is a process and once you are real you are never ugly no matter what happens, except to those who don't understand. Well, I must be one of those who don't understand but I know I am not alone. In a culture that idolizes an image of physical beauty that is largely sexual and unattainable there are hordes of us who despise our own bodies. This chapter may help me get over that, but it will require reverence so better start practicing.

One of the first points Taylor makes is that we have trouble in this society separating the physical from the sexual. I remember a time when my kids were swimming and marveling at the way a small, skinny boy we knew had worked very hard to develop a physique that the ancient Greeks would have used for sculpture. Of course everyone who heard me (including my mortified children) was horrified and I could see that suspicious "Is she a pedophile?" kind of look in their eyes (even though the boy was actually closer to being a man). I now refrain from ever giving voice to such thoughts, but it does still bother me. We learn and reinforce those ideas so strongly, yet revere those sexy images in advertisements. If the Word was made flesh, why should we not show reverence for our flesh?

In order to get to that point Taylor remarks that we should, at some point, pray in front of a mirror while naked. I am definitely not brave enough or smart enough or faithful enough to do that... yet. But if I am to practice wearing skin, to honor the life that my Creator put in these bones, then I guess at some point that might help. Wow! What wishy-washy words! You can just see me squirming and trying to get out of that one, can't you? It is so much easier and comfortable to ignore the physical and stick with the mental processes of faith.

And yet, suffering, especially physical suffering, is one of the quickest ways I enter into prayer. When my heart feels like it is going to jump out of my chest while I am on that darn elliptical I am in constant prayer for physical strength. When I bang my toe in the middle of the night looking for the light switch I pray for it to not be broken. When my loved one lies in pain, dying, I cannot stop asking for relief - for both of us. Wearing skin, actually feeling, this brings us to God more quickly and deeply than all the information from all the books and all the internet sources.

For me the problem with feeling is that it opens us up not just to God, but to others. It makes us vulnerable, and I have spent a lifetime building up my armor. Why on earth would I take it off now?

Paying Attention

2010-08-12T06:13:00.000-07:00

It has been a while, family vacation - preparation, going and recovering - has been consuming my time. Getting back on schedule, and I was actually able to finish the book while on vacation. The second practice is titled paying attention which I find a little misleading since the chapter is about reverence. But if you think about it, it is darn near impossible to be reverent if you don't pay attention and really think about how amazing just about everything you encounter is.

Throughout this discussion Taylor makes it clear that reverence is about feeling awe in the presence of things that are bigger than you. Even something as small as a mustard seed, if you consider all that goes into its creation, is bigger than you. That is why paying attention is required in order to feel reverence. If you don't see - really see - the things and people around you how can you appreciate them and what it took to make them? (Side thought here from the movie Avatar: anyone remember their greeting?) She goes on to name some of the "... practices that nourish reverence in a human life: paying attention, taking care, respecting things that can kill you, making the passage from fear to awe."

This sounds pretty easy to do, but it takes time, and in this day and age who has the time to sit and look at something and think about how awe-inspiring its existence is? I know I have trouble fitting in all the things I "need" to do, running from one thing to the next. I have to confess that as the kids have gotten older it has gotten a little easier, but paying attention at the level Taylor describes requires giving up something that I need to hold on to. What is that? The illusion that I have some control in my life. If I can multi-task, work on the computer, talk on my cell phone, do laundry, run the dishwasher, make sure the kids are at their appointments on time and manage all the other details of our lives then I don't have time to consider what it took to grow that tomato sitting on my counter waiting to be eaten at dinner. So, I am in control, I am god-like in my power to manage my life. Really? Do I really think that? Do you really think that? Why else would it be so important to move so quickly, skip over the "little" things?

I guess it is a good thing she calls them practices. I think this one will require a lot of practice. Although Taylor admits that reverence can be painful, she also contends that it can heal. She writes on page 32, "I know for a fact that it is possible to survive great grief by hauling a mattress outside on a clear night and lying flat on your back under the belly of the sky. Holding a baby also works, or a stunned hummingbird if you are lucky enough to find one." I don't think I have ever had an experience like that, but maybe I wasn't paying attention...

The Practices

2010-07-20T18:47:00.000-07:00

OK, back to An Altar in the World. After the introduction Taylor introduces and explains practices that "... will help you see the red X under your feet. ...help you recognize... ordinary-looking places where human beings have met and may continue to meet up with the divine More that they sometimes call God." Although she says that you don't have to read them in any particular order, being a particularly boring person I am reading them start to finish. The first practice is The Practice of Waking Up to God.

She uses the story of Jacob to frame the discussion of where we find God. Jacob, while fleeing for his life, lays down with rock for a pillow, has a dream from God and recognizes the holiness of that place by making an altar and calling it Bethel. If you think about Jacob, waking up from the dream of angels going up and down a ladder, you have to marvel at the way he knew, right away and without a doubt, that God was in that place. He didn't need the tent or a tabernacle or any other "place" to have a life changing encounter with God. So why do we?

I have to wonder if it isn't our need to feel like we belong, like we have control. If we set up buildings and limits that we can see, feel, touch, understand... then we know exactly where we stand. Especially in comparison to those around us who don't "belong." Is that really what it is? Making myself feel better about my relationship with God by proving how much better it is than someone else's? And how can I even really know the quality of someone else's relationship with God?

The word that keeps coming to me in pondering those questions is control. So then, it seems the answer is to give up trying to have control and look around you. Be present where you are, but also wake up and see God where He is - everywhere. We have placed limits on the venues where we believe we will encounter God, but will removing the limits we have placed on God open our eyes and hearts, or is there more work to do there? How and when and where will I get to see those angels going up and down the ladder to heaven? If I simply open my heart and abandon my ideas of what that should look like will it just happen? I hope so...

Who Are We?

2010-07-15T05:14:00.000-07:00

My community church is facing some big decisions in the very near future, and as can be expected, they have created a lot of conversation, both pro and con. That is normal and to be expected, and actually quite healthy. All this week though, I keep having this thought. It pops up when I least expect it, doing the dishes, when I was doing my hamster routine on the elliptical this morning, driving down "Manslaughter" Road.

The Parable of the Talents.

Usually I try to ignore that voice, but some would have me believe it might actually be God whispering in my ear. Yeah, right. Not MY ear. But on the off chance that they might be right I am going to re-post what was written after we studied that parable earlier this year, with a few additions. You will find the "old" material in italics, the new just plain. Even if you aren't involved in any way in the decisions I mentioned above, maybe this will be a good exercise for you, too. I hope so.

Here are a couple of questions I asked myself before re-reading the post, already having an idea of the content:

Who do I identify with most? Why?

Who do I want to be? Why?

If those two are different, how do I reconcile them and move from one to the other? And what impact does that have on our decisions? How do I decide? Out of fear, or out of faith, and if the answer is both then how do I balance them?

I have to confess that I was very unfocused this week, so the notes and this post will probably leave a lot to be desired. We studied the parable of The Talents. I have always struggled with this parable, but today I found a little different perspective, using some of the study techniques we have been applying in the past few sessions. I repeatedly found my mind wandering to consider what this parable reveals about the nature and kingdom of God.

I feel pretty certain you are familiar with the story of the master who gives three servants a sum of money to care for while he is gone. When he returns he calls them to account for the money, and while two of them have risked the money they have also doubled the amount through their investment. The third, out of fear, hid the money and returned the exact same amount he was given. At that the master throws him out as lazy and wicked. Really? In this economy I should be making risky investments? What happens if I lose it all? Clearly I identify more with the third servant than the master, how about you?

There are some pretty easy lessons to draw from this parable, but what does it tell us about the kingdom of God. For me the message this week is about relationships. The master knows his servants, gives to each according to his abilities and expects that they do their best. The first two servants work hard and take risks to further the interests of their master because why...? Do you work harder for someone you respect and trust? I know I do. But the third servant, in his preface, clearly shows that not only does he not trust his master to be just, he does not respect him.

If you read the version in Matthew 25:14-30 the master asks the first two servants to be his partner in The Message. The master invites them into a more intimate relationship. But the third servant, who fears and does not trust, is cast out. The master gave him a chance, but he did not respond.

The version in Luke 19:11-27 is similar but a little different in the details. The master is seeking to be made king, and despite the protest of the people he still becomes king. And then he puts the first two servants in charge of cities as rulers. I can't help wondering if that isn't a parallel to the Mustard Seed, implying that the kingdom of God will come no matter what. And when it does you better be ready, taking risks, working to further the kingdom, but most importantly trusting God to be just, not fair, just.

And in light of recent discussion I have to wonder if I haven't spent most of my life being so worried about hanging on to what I have that I have missed even dreaming about what I might have. Where does the courage to risk and act come from? I am not finding mine right now. Any thoughts?

Why Am I?

2010-07-10T05:09:00.000-07:00

When I read the introduction to Barbara Brown Taylor's An Altar in the World, I had to wonder if she had been peeking inside my head. In one of the very first paragraphs of the introduction she verbalizes what I have been feeling as discomfort, my body itching in my own skin, a restlessness that I have not been able to name. In a discussion of the difference between being "religious" and "spiritual" she talks about a deep longing for more. Don't you feel it too? There has to be more to life, right? Isn't that what religion tells us? There is some deep, divine purpose to your life, and the purpose of religious rituals and formal beliefs is to help you along the path, to comprehend and appreciate that purpose.

There are a couple of premises underlying that understanding that may be part of my problem. First, I think that belief implies that without ritual and formal beliefs you can not understand God or your purpose. And from there you can infer that you need to understand your purpose in order for your life to have meaning. As I put those words on the page I hope that is not true, because if it is then Me=Fail. And now, trying to get out of the fail category, I am left wondering if that really is the message that my religion is sending, or is it simply the limitations that I have put on it based on my own personal framework and experiences?

Well, maybe part of the(my) problem is in the structured, institutional constraints that traditional, organized religion has placed on our understanding of God. I accepted that God, and relationship with God, had to occur in those holy settings that are described and proscribed in ritual and formal belief. How many times have you heard people talk about what worship should look like, how we should behave in church, what outreach should look like? It seems that we do have a collective, institutional understanding of holy, and that is what leaves me wanting more. I just don't feel it in those settings. I don't really care if my church has a traditional or a contemporary service because that is just a pattern for the act of worship, and it is the act that is important for me.

I am hopeful because it seems that what Taylor presents in this book is the idea that holiness happens in every day activities. It does not have constraints, we do. We simply need to open ourselves up to experiencing holiness by suspending our ossified beliefs about where and how encounters with God happen, and we will see. Maybe the only barrier to me being able to feel the "more" I have been longing for is... me.

Does Bad News Always Have to Come in Threes?

2010-07-08T05:20:00.001-07:00

Friends, this is fair warning. If you even whisper to someone near me that you are having trouble with your colon and you don't do something about it, I will probably be forced to tackle and pummel you until you do. I have one relative who has just discontinued treatment as it is not working and the side effects are worse than the disease, a second who got pathology from surgery and it is not good news, and a third who is having surgery today.

Whatever your issue, take care of it, take the time to attend to the health of your body and stop being afraid. Be bold. I like the line from Pink's new song, "Have you ever looked fear in the face and said I just don't care?" Please.

On another note, our fearless leader gave me a book to read - An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor - and it is pretty good, thought provoking. I may begin some posts on it and invite you to comment and expand the discussion so stay tuned. And in the mean time, take care of you.

Get Screened!

2010-06-23T07:13:00.000-07:00

This learner has done his/her best to be true to the group and not abuse administrator privileges, but this morning I feel called to use the forum for a personal issue. Got a phone call last night to inform me that a second close relative has been diagnosed with colon cancer. It is a terrible disease and one that no one really likes to talk about, but I have always been politically and socially "incorrect", so I will talk about it.

Both of my relatives had symptoms for a long time - over a year. Both of them, for their own reasons, postponed and delayed having a colonoscopy. One of them had a mass large enough to cause a bowel obstruction. In our society, no one likes to talk about poop but EVERYONE does it! Get over it! If you have changes or pain, talk to your family, friends, and most importantly your doctor.

And now the next point - if you have symptoms, check with your doctor and get a colonoscopy. I have had several, with a family history, and they aren't that bad. It is one day, a few hours, and some really good drugs! (Wish I could get some of them for other uses!) Everybody says the prep is the worst, and it probably is, but IT ISN"T THAT BAD. Really. Seriously. Just do it, especially if you are over 50 or if you are symptomatic.

Here is a link to the Mayo Clinic. Talk to your doctor and get screened, please!

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/colon-cancer/ds00035/dsection=symptoms

Missouri United Methodist Annual Conference

2010-06-20T15:37:00.000-07:00

When asked again if I would go to Annual Conference I said yes, I had graduated to a two year student and this year I could go, relax, and take in all of the spiritual sermons and reports that were presented. I could really show someone else the way. The first good thing that happened was my friend from last year was there. Perfect, we both knew the ropes. So we begin friends with the faith journey of Annual Conference June 4-7, 2010 at the Expo center in Springfield, MO. The theme of the conference: Growing Deeper: Deepening the Spiritual Life for Leadership in the Church.

The conferences that Bishop Schnase leads have a very talented team that excels in making the conference meaningful. I encourage you to say yes if you are asked to serve this church as Lay Leader to Annual Conference. It is a huge way to help your faith journey. From the words of Paul from Romans 12:3 in The Message:

3I'm speaking to you out of deep gratitude for all that God has given me, and especially as I have responsibilities in relation to you. Living then, as every one of you does, in pure grace, it's important that you not misinterpret yourselves as people who are bringing this goodness to God. No, God brings it all to you. The only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what he does for us, not by what we are and what we do for him.

Now I present to you some key points from powerful sermons that were presented. These words mean action on our part, without action they are just words on a piece of paper:

Passionate Worship, Intentional Learning, Risk-Taking Ministry and Service, and Extravagant Giving

Come hungry; Be fed; Leave with the strength to go and feed others.

Isaiah 58: Do not use God for our own purposes, rather than offering ourselves for God's purposes.

Wake Up, Church, Wake Up!

Everyone can keep on growing and learning because there are people depending on us.

Build and release disciples, identify your gifts and give them back to the community and world.

God will make a difference if you say YES!

God permits U-turns

And if you cannot get excited about Jesus, who can you get excited about?

We had a moving service of Retirement and Commissioning, and our pastor was commissioned and appointed to us again this year! If you would like to see more highlights of this conference go to:

www.MOMissionCast.com

As we all grow deeper in our faith, remember we are never on the road alone!

Intercessory Prayer

2010-05-27T05:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday came and went, and I didn't even think about writing a post. Nice to be relieved of duty for the summer, but I would like to try to continue something weekly, just to stay in touch. It would be REALLY great if each member of the group could take a week. I'll be happy to take care of the logistics if you email me the post. That way we could even include our dear friends who have moved on to new places, but still have their old place in our hearts.

The topic for this week - intercessory prayer. Does it work? Why do it? What is the purpose? I have been praying for a close one with cancer that is not responding to any treatment, a family friend who had triple bypass surgery this week, another family friend - a 22 year old firefighter who is on life support after a horrific car accident - and of course the day to day needs of my family as we face some major transitions. I thought I would get comfort, but I don't. I feel like the fog, I'm there, you can see me, but I can't do a darn thing. Nothing. I know that, so where is the help?

Anyone have any answers?

Get Ready, Get Ready

2010-05-20T05:26:00.000-07:00

Well, we have had our final meeting for the year going in to summer. We will resume in September, usually after Labor Day. As I sat down to write the post from yesterday's meeting I kept hearing The Temptations singing "Get Ready." Today we looked at the parable of the Ten Bridesmaids/Virgins from Matthew 25:1-13. It is a pretty straightforward story about being ready for the bridegroom, but we spent a lot of time looking at some of the other, underlying messages. Those are the ones that captured my feeble mind this week.

First, according to The Message there were five silly virgins and ten smart virgins. The smart virgins must have been Girl Scouts because they were prepared with extra oil for their lamps, but the silly girls did not take any extra oil. When they realized they were almost out of oil they asked the smart girls to give them some oil, but the smart girls refused. Come on, couldn't they share just a little bit? We decided that the message for us on this day is that you are responsible for your own readiness. We are told over and over again that no one knows when Christ will return - except God, of course - and our job is to live right and be ready. So are we not our sisters' keeper? Where do we draw the line between making disciples and being responsible for disciples? We talked about "let go and let God" in terms of bringing others, especially people who are close to us, into relationship with God. Clearly the silly virgins didn't take their responsibility to the bridegroom seriously, and when they were forced to go out and buy more oil they were caught and had to face the consequences of their actions.

And that brings us to the second point of the day: there is judgment for those who were not ready. We don't really talk a lot about judgment in the church today, and we needed to clarify when the judgment Jesus is talking about occurs - the Second Coming - and who does the judging - God. Well, what about judgment in our daily lives, for all our sins? I think most of us decided that natural consequences are our day-to-day judgment, and that if we react to those and return to God (and don't keep sinning) then we will be OK at THE judgment, whenever that may be.

We also talked about Matthew's intention when writing the Gospel. Matthew was very concerned with tying the life and times of Jesus to scripture, addressing a primarily Jewish audience. If you think about it, the Old Testament scripture he was quoting quite often spoke of harsh judgment. He was also very concerned that Jesus had not yet returned. They expected Jesus sooner rather than later, and he was trying to bolster the spirits of the early Christians, pointing out to them the need to always be ready since they were expecting Jesus any time. Two thousand years after the fact that seems a little... naive? But at the same time it reinforces the very clear message that is repeated throughout the Bible that Christ will return in God's time, only God knows when that will be.

It is hard to think about judgment, and harsh judgment like exclusion from the kingdom for the silly virgins. It is hard to think about the Second Coming without some fear. It is hard to think about loved ones who haven't come as far in their faith journey not being ready. It is hard to embrace the mystery and to trust that whatever the outcome, the loving God that I worship has a plan in store that is more wonderful than anything I can imagine, and even though there will be judgment (consequences) if I work at being ready God will keep working with me and on me. I guess I had better get ready...

The Case Against "Should"

2010-05-12T16:24:00.000-07:00

Today's parable is the one about the prayer of the pharisee and the tax collector from Luke 18:9-14. It seems pretty straightforward, simple message, but remember that part of the definition of a parable that says it "... leaves the mind in sufficient doubt about its precise application as to tease it into active thought?" Well, it teased my mind into active thought (I know,k you didn't think i could do that, did you?) and I am going to ramble on - again!

In this parable Jesus addresses people who are complacently pleased with themselves, people who think they are doing all the things they should be doing (according to the Law), so God should favor them. In particular Jesus points out the actions of the Pharisee who not only prays publicly about how grateful he is to be better than all those other sinners, but postures and poses himself first. Surely that is because there is a certain way you should look when you pray. There is a certain set of words you should use when you pray. There is a formula for how you should pray. And of course everyone knows you should go to church every Sunday, you should support the church with a tithe, you should actively participate in the life of the church. You should be sure everyone knows you are doing what you should be doing. Come on, admit it. You have felt each one of those should's at one time or another. I know I have.

But look closely at all those should's. They are all about our actions gaining us favor. They have nothing to with God and everything to do with me! And if I think about it so does every other should that comes out of my mouth. We should help each other, we should be kinder to each other, we should do things this way or that way... It is all about hand-wringing and bemoaning the fact that I know better than everyone else, and they aren't listening! But in the parable it was the tax collector who was completely and utterly vulnerable, open to God and God's grace and mercy in whatever form they might take, who Jesus commends as the one who will gain entry to the kingdom. The message to me is that it not about how we believe or how we show that we believe or making sure that others know that we believe. It is all about being completely and totally open and honest with God and ourselves and letting everyone else take care of themselves, recognizing that none of us has better standing than the other because of what or how we do things. Faith is about doing, but it not about how we do it, or how we should do it. God will take us as we are, where we are, when we are ready. We simply need to humble ourselves and trust.

The Unmerciful Servant, Matthew 18:21-30

2010-05-05T15:53:00.000-07:00

Wow! We really struggled with this one today. I just don't even know what to say, so if this is rambling and incoherent post some comments and straighten me out! One thing we didn't discuss this morning is what comes before the parable, in Matthew 18:1-20. I went back to read that and in the first part Jesus points out the need to be childlike in order to enter the kingdom of God. Then he moves on to talk about how the good shepherd leaves the 99 sheep to search for the one who is lost, and how to confront one another in love, how God responds to the prayers of the faith community. And after all that Peter works up the nerve to ask, no, really Lord, is someone wrongs me how many times do I really have to forgive them?

Well, that puts a little different spin on this parable for me. Jesus is trying to make a point and Peter, the Rock, isn't willing or able to hear it. Maybe that is why there is such an exaggeration between the amount owed by the first servant and the amount owed him by a fellow servant. Maybe that is why Jesus uses the perfect number, seven, times ten times the perfect number - another exaggeration. The other servants got action when they told on the first one for not forgiving after he was forgiven. The community is empowered to hold you accountable, no matter who you are (Peter). Are you getting the point yet? Do you suppose Jesus ever got frustrated with the Apostles? And what was it that was keeping Peter from hearing the message? Pride? Desire for justice on his own terms? Need for control? Desire for vengeance? All of the above?

The larger part of our discussion focused on the process of forgiveness. In order for it to be complete, perfect as God desires it to be, both parties must participate. If the wronged person forgives the one who wronged him, but the other does not accept responsibility or the forgiveness given then the forgiveness is not as God intended it to be.

But is the wronged person stuck because of the inaction of the one who wronged him? We decided not, but being human we couldn't get past the need to hold that person accountable. And maybe we aren't supposed to. We talked about Bonhoffer's "cheap grace" and it occurs to me after reading up on it a little that the "cheap grace" is what the offender bestows on himself by saying insincerely that he is sorry, or what the community gives out if they accept the simple apology without expecting or requiring repentance. "Cheap grace" is what the wronged person bestows on himself by saying he forgives, but not really forgiving from the heart. "Costly grace" is the treasure that has to be sought again and again and again and requires the hard work, the dirty work.

"Costly grace" requires us to look at how anger and holding a grudge poisons our lives and souls. "Costly grace" requires us to work toward an understanding and acceptance of the consequences that God will deal out - in His time - to those who have wronged us. "Costly grace" requires us to hold one another accountable even when it is awkward, uncomfortable, difficult, alienating. "Costly grace" requires us to keep working on the process of forgiveness because it comes in stages, layers, pieces. "Costly grace" is Peter following the first call, "Follow me," at the beginning and also the second call, "Follow me," at the end, after a full life of discipleship. "Costly grace" provides forgiveness, but not without consequence.

The Parable of the Weeds

2010-04-28T13:59:00.000-07:00

Matthew 13:24-30 and 36-43. Wow! I don't even know where to begin with this one. Somebody help me! Some interesting facts that we learned today include:
1. There are approximately 40 parables in the Bible. Only two of them are
explained and this is one of them.
2. Eight of the 40 parables talk about judgment - seven of the eight are in Matthew.
3. Eleven of the parables in Matthew talk about weeping and gnashing of teeth.
It seems to me that Matthew was really concerned with people keeping the faith in the face of persecution, questions about the perceived "failures" of Jesus, and a wait for the Second Coming that was going to be much longer than they had originally anticipated.

Perhaps the most striking idea, and the one that jumped out at us first, is that good and bad are allowed to coexist for a time. If you take that to be us, then good and bad, believers and nonbelievers all live together and it is up to the landowner (God) to decide at the harvest which to keep and which to toss and burn. That can be reassuring, and in some ways very pleasing, to think that the "bad" people are going to get their comeuppance. In other words, I will get the last laugh. On the other hand, it also tells me that only God can and will decide who is good wheat and who is bad weed. What if I am deemed weed? As our Fearless Leader said today, "There is a little bad in the "best" of us, and a little good in the "worst" of us." So how can I be sure about where I fall on the continuum? And what about my family?

At the end of the day we can only take care of ourselves and trust and leave the rest to God, embrace the mystery, believe that God's plan for us is better than anything we can imagine...sigh...Again, easier said than done...!

Persistence

2010-04-21T15:27:00.000-07:00

This week we studied the Parable of the Persistent Widow from Luke 18:1-8. While the focus of much of our discussion today was on the act and purpose of prayer, it seems to me that after mulling this one over the message is as much about persistent faith as it is about prayer, or persistence in and of itself.

There are only two characters in this parable - a widow and an arrogant judge who doesn't care about what men or God think of him. We assume the widow has no male relative to speak for her or else they would be there, and as a widow she as no legal standing. And yet, she keeps coming to see the judge time and time and time again. She believes the judge will not only listen to her, but will eventually give her the justice she seeks. She knows that in the end justice will prevail. God's justice.

The judge realizes that the woman is not going to stop pleading her case until she receives justice. It is important to note that it is not about getting her way, or getting something she doesn't deserve. It is about justice. But it is also about someone who doesn't care one whit for men or God being able to recognize the strength of the widow's relationship with God. Remember, Luke is really concerned that Jesus hasn't yet returned and is trying to convince the early Christians (and maybe himself) that they need to stay the course, to wait, to remain faithful, that God will return in God's own time.

And that brings us back to prayer. Do the answers we want come just because we pray? Do they come when we want them? Do they come in the quiet time? Can God speak to us in the midst of the chaos of our daily lives? And are there any universal answers to these questions, or are they unique as each one of us? Prayer is about being conscious and purposeful about our relationship with God. Persistent prayer is about being in constant relationship with God.

Investing In... The Future

2010-04-14T19:00:00.000-07:00

I have to confess that I was very unfocused this week, so the notes and this post will probably leave a lot to be desired. We studied the parable of The Talents. I have always struggled with this parable, but today I found a little different perspective, using some of the study techniques we have been applying in the past few sessions. I repeatedly found my mind wandering to consider what this parable reveals about the nature and kingdom of God.

I feel pretty certain you are familiar with the story of the master who gives three servants a sum of money to care for while he is gone. When he returns he calls them to account for the money, and while two of them have risked the money they have also doubled the amount through their investment. The third, out of fear, hid the money and returned the exact same amount he was given. At that the master throws him out as lazy and wicked. Really? In this economy I should be making risky investments? What happens if I lose it all? Clearly I identify more with the third servant than the master, how about you?

There are some pretty easy lessons to draw from this parable, but what does it tell us about the kingdom of God. For me the message this week is about relationships. The master knows his servants, gives to each according to his abilities and expects that they do their best. The first two servants work hard and take risks to further the interests of their master because why...? Do you work harder for someone you respect and trust? I know I do. But the third servant, in his preface, clearly shows that not only does he not trust his master to be just, he does not respect him.

If you read the version in Matthew 25:14-30 the master asks the first two servants to be his partner in The Message. The master invites them into a more intimate relationship. But the third servant, who fears and does not trust, is cast out. The master gave him a chance, but he did not respond.

The version in Luke 19:11-27 is similar but a little different in the details. The master is seeking to be made king, and despite the protest of the people he still becomes king. And then he puts the first two servants in charge of cities as rulers. I can't help wondering if that isn't a parallel to the Mustard Seed, implying that the kingdom of God will come no matter what. And when it does you better be ready, taking risks, working to further the kingdom, but most importantly trusting God to be just, not fair, just.

Liar, Liar, Pants on Fire!

2010-04-07T12:40:00.000-07:00

Yep, you heard me, Fearless Leader! After the past four sessions you had us all going along with you, on the same page about the purpose of the parables - to describe and reveal the Kingdom of God. Then this week not only did you stomp on the brakes, you threw the whole train into reverse with the parable of The Wicked Tenants and said THIS IS NOT THE EMPIRE OF GOD!

This parable is found in Matthew(21:33-43), Luke(20:9-18), Mark12:1-11), and even Thomas. I am going to copy your "the facts and only the facts, ma'am" summary for those who may not be familiar:

"There once was a man who owned a vineyard, who leased it out to tenants. When the time came, he sent one of his servants to collect what was due him from the vineyard. But the tenants seized him and beat him up and sent him away empty-handed. So he sent another servant, and this one, too, they beat up and sent away empty-handed. So the owner decided to send his son, saying, "Perhaps they will respect my son." But when the tenants saw that it was the son they said, "This is the heir to the vineyard! If we kill him, the vineyard will be ours!" So they seized him and killed him."

Yuck! Not a pretty story! How greedy! If you read the versions in the Gospels you will find that each writer added his own touches in order to better reach his intended audience - for Matthew, the Jews; Mark sought to reach both Jew and Gentile; and Luke addressed himself mainly to the Gentiles. Considering the societal context we came to understand how the people who had been given this land by God himself, who were displaced by the Romans, who still considered the land they lived on and worked, albeit as tenants, belonged to them. It was rightfully theirs! We could identify with both the tenants and the landowner, but why did Jesus tell this parable like this? What does this parable tell us about the Kingdom of God?

It really doesn't tell us about the Kingdom of God, it tells us about the reality of life at that time. As with all of the other parables, there are many different layers, allegories, and places where the mind can be drawn to better understand the nature of God. But there were a couple of things that really stuck with me today. For one, in this parable - in all three Gospel versions - the listeners are asked to come to a conclusion as to what the landowner will do, and when they venture a guess that is just (even thought it is harsh) their guess is affirmed! That hasn't happened in the other parables we have studied, they have been really open-ended and forced the listener to draw his or her own conclusion as to what they meant. Secondly, in the end, no one wins but death. And finally, we accept it as an honest assessment of the reality of the day, not the parable-based picture of what could/will be in the Kingdom of God.

Those three points lead me to believe that Jesus told the parable, and the Apostles used it, to build their credibility with their audiences. They were talking all this time with the "disposable" people of society: tax collectors, prostitutes, unskilled and skilled tradesmen, women... Jesus and the disciples spoke of the glorious life to come, building God's kingdom here on Earth. And yet their listeners lived in abject poverty without any respect. So this story tells us that God DOES know what our lives are like, God DOES care for us. And there ARE consequences, so come on along and follow. But the Kingdom WILL be different. Integrity and credibility... well... maybe this one does does describe the Kingdom of God... after all...

Weeds in the Garden

2010-04-01T06:07:00.000-07:00

This week's parable was the mustard seed and the yeast for Matthew 13:31-35. Of course almost all of ys have heard the comparison of the size of our faith to the size of a mustard seed and how God grows both. Haven't you seen those pendants, the small globes with an embedded mustard seed? But thanks to our fearless leader we looked at this in the context of the society and the geography of the time, and it took on a new meaning for us.

If any of you are gardeners, or even if you aren't, then you can appreciate the obnoxious, pervasive and invasive habit of weeds. You must be ever vigilant in removing them from the garden. Think of "plants" like multiflora rose, honeysuckle, mint, and bamboo... kudzu. That is what mustard is - a weed that will overtake the entire garden in no time flat. And that is what Jesus compares the kingdom of God to, a weed that you cannot stop. Understanding that frame of reference, if I were in political power and someone told me that there was new sheriff in town whose power would spread like mustard in the garden, I would not be happy to say the least. Now I understand the political implications of this parable. Wow! As our leader said this is one of the most radical of Jesus' descriptions of the kingdom of God.

Then there is the idea that a man deliberately planted this weed in his garden. now why on earth would he do that? We decided that it must be because there is room for everyone in the kingdom of God, whether weed or valued crop. It also turns upside down the Laws of the Jews, showing that the New Covenant supersedes the Old Covenant, the Covenant of the Law.

Finally we looked at it as a metaphor for the way God works. He provides the seed (invitation), we plant it (respond to the invitation), and then the grace of God grows the seed (our relationship). There are so very many layers to these parable, we could discus and write on and on and on... Instead we ended this week with a challenge to consider what seed we plant and then allowing the grace of God to work on the seeds after we have planted them.

What Does it Mean to be a Good Samaritan?

2010-03-25T18:22:00.000-07:00

Today we read Luke 10:25-37,the story of the Good Samaritan, another very well known parable of Jesus that is unique to the Gospel of Luke, but certainly not the only parable using Samaritan characters. We know that Samaritans were hated by the Jews of Jesus' day because of intermarriage during the exile to Babylon and the blending of religions. They were outcasts and "unclean."

Earlier we learned that parables answer a question. What question does this parable answer? The answer in simple terms is that it tells the reader how to be a good neighbor (a good Samaritan). What did this mean for Jesus' listeners? They were not the powerful, but rather the lowest class, so they would not have identified with the priest or the Levite. For any Jew to identify with an unclean Samaritan is hard to envision. No, they probably identified with the victim since they either had experienced compassion or, at the very least, hoped for it. We discussed how receiving compassion seems to encourage compassion (pay it forward). We saw some arguments for why these "good citizens" crossed to the other side of the road and passed by. The road to Jericho was a known dangerous place and they may have feared for their own safety, the bleeding victim would have rendered them "unclean." And what of the innkeeper? The story could have ended at the roadside. In the Kingdom of God help is carried to completion.

What does it mean for us today? We found that we could place ourselves in the role of any of the characters, including the priest and Levite. We know that we have many times "crossed to the other side of the road' to avoid an uncomfortable situation and have rationalized our actions. It's easy to think we would be a god Samaritan, but none of us knows what our action would be until we are confronted with a situation that calls us out of our comfort zone. We could even put ourselves in the place of the victim. Would we trust a hated Samaritan? The victim needed his enemy. It is very hard to be the "person in the ditch" ( a demeaning position, such as having to apply for food stamps for your family). Most of us are much more comfortable being the dispenser of compassion than having to receive compassion.

What does this parable tell us about the Kingdom of God? Help can come from unexpected sources, we ARE our brother's keeper, you may need to trust your enemy. Caring for neighbor ( A Wesleyan Core Term) "goes hand in hand with loving God. We don't have to choose between feeding on Scripture and feeding the hungry, between reaching out to God and reaching out to those in need. The Christian walk requires both works of mercy and works of piety. Who is our neighbor? According to Wesley, our neighbor is anyone who needs our help, not just the person already part of our group. Wesley was especially concerned that we care for those we might not initially think of as neighbors, those beyond our immediate neighborhood, people of different faiths or ethnic backgrounds. Most of all caring for neighbors means not passing by the most needy and vulnerable, the hungry injured or hurting. Wesleyans believe that God has bound together all people - no matter how different - by creating each of us in God's image. God has already made us all neighbors so we can expand our hearts to care for neighbors down the road and around the world.

Could it be that the kingdom of God "is that place where we find ourselves in relationship with someone with whom we would never be caught dead, when we realize that we need our enemy just to survive, when we find help from someone from whom we have no right to expect it, that those things which give identity and mark community boundaries no longer stand in the way of human care and we are lost in one human identity?"

Prodigal Means What?!

2010-03-17T13:41:00.000-07:00

Today we read Luke 15:1-3 and 11b-32 - the Parable of the Prodigal Son. Familiar story, pretty well known, and we think we know what it is all about - repentance - but do we? For instance, did you know that the adjective prodigal actually means recklessly extravagant, giving or yielding profusely, lavish, abundant? I sure didn't. I assumed its only meaning was profligate and wasteful.

We had a problem with this parable, and maybe you do too. After all, who can't relate to the older brother? Nose to the grindstone, faithful, constant, rock, hard worker, dedicated. And then here comes the baby brother who shamed - yes, shamed - the entire family by asking for his inheritance and then went off and wasted it all! And his father, who shamed - yes, shamed - the entire family by giving baby brother his portion when he asked for it now welcomes him back with a party of epic proportions! OK, maybe not epic, but I bet that is how it felt to the elder brother...

As generous and giving as the father and "prodigal" son seem, no one sent for the older brother, who was in the fields, when the party started. Why not? Maybe it is because for him to join the party would mean he was shamed as much as his father and brother. Since he wasn't summoned he had a choice - to remain outside, live by societal rules and keep his good standing in the community or to join in with his father and celebrate the return of a brother thought lost forever, even though that would probably mean he would be ostracized. This really threatened the elder brother's world view. In his understanding working hard, following the rules yielded blessings. Not following the rules meant curses and bad fortune, yet that is not what baby brother got. So does that mean he isn't blessed? Or are his rules getting in the way of his relationship with God? Looks like we are back to that fourth point about parables - that they leave sufficient doubt about the meaning....

If Jesus used parables to create a vision of what God, and the kingdom of God are like, then what does this parable tell us? It show that God offers unconditional love, is ever present with us, forgiving, gracious, longing to be in relationship with us and ALWAYS allows us to choose. This parable makes it very clear that in the kingdom of God the culture's definition of shame does NOT determine worth, but ironically that is exactly what prompted Jesus to tell this parable. And it would seem that the kingdom of God is just, but maybe not fair...

Life Isn't Fair...

2010-03-12T05:40:00.000-08:00

This week's parable - the landowner and the vineyard workers - really illustrated that last point from Dodd about parables, the one about leaving sufficient doubt about their meaning. I think it is fair to say that all of us have struggled with this parable. After all, is it fair that those who worked for one hour got the same pay as those who worked all day in the hot sun? And then he pays those guys first, so that the ones who worked longest could see they were getting the same! Come on! Isn't that just adding insult to injury?

But what about the message of the landowner? He has been just; he has done exactly what he promised for each worker, no more, no less. That generated a discussion of the difference between fair -which we defined as an equal distribution of resources- and just-which we defined as an unequal distribution of resources based on need. When my kids were little I had a mantra that they hated - "Life isn't fair, it just is." It was a lot easier to say that to them when it came to sharing toys than it is to apply it to myself when it comes to issues like equal pay for equal work.

There are so many ways you can look at this parable. It points out the need to mind your own business and leave the rest to God; it may be an illustration for the apostles and other followers (including us) that while they may have little in this life and work long and hard, in the end they will be "first"; it shows that God continually and repeatedly reaches out to all people; it gives value to even the people of lowest status in society, and God acts first, inviting us into relationship with Him.

But for me, this week in this place, the message was a little different. We did briefly touch on it toward the end of our time. In an Old Testament view possessions and wealth were a sign of God's blessing, but Jesus points out that only a few will be able to handle wealth. Moving forward to current times the words of singer/songwriter Javier Mendoza came to mind: "...I'm addicted to my possessions, I don't need a thing, but still I want more. I guess I just want to be accepted, prove to the world that I am gifted, because if I succeed then I belong." For me the message is to let go of the things that bind me to this life so that i can improve my relationship with God. Why can't this be easier...?

Tell Me a Story

2010-03-03T14:48:00.000-08:00

Today we began a series on the parables of Jesus, but we began slowly. We were all heavy hearted by the number of prayer concerns we had. I, for one, am hoping that next week we will have as many joys to balance things out. In the mean time, we have done our best in prayer and support for each other, and now we leave the rest to God.

Well, a good place to start is with an understanding of what a parable is, don't you think? Our leader offered us a scholarly definition from C.H. Dodd"
"At its simplest a parable is:
1.) a metaphor or simile;
2.) drawn from nature or common life;
3.) arresting the hearer by its vividness or strangeness, and;
4.) leaving the mind in sufficient doubt about its precise application to
tease it into active thought."
A running theme in the parables is that language has the power to create a world and what Jesus does in the parables is to create the Kingdom of God so that we can see what the Kingdom of God looks like... for ourselves.

So then, a parable is a representation of the truth of current, earthly life, which any hearer can understand and to which he can relate from personal experience. While the story may be told in response to a directly posed question or an implied question, it never directly answers the question. Instead, it illustrates the desirable, the possible, and the ideal, the Kingdom of God. It requires the hearer to sort out for himself the answer.

We did discuss the parable from Luke 10:25 - The Banquet - but I would like to talk a little bit more about the process that is compelled by Christ in using parables, a process that is also illustrated in this particular parable. You see, stories are told so that anyone can understand them, identify with them, and if you understand the culture of that time comprehend the subtle undercurrents and implications. They are open-ended, an invitation if you will to construct your own individual understanding of the Kingdom of God. And that, my friends, is precisely what we are offered all the time. God invites us into relationship with Him, and accepts us exactly where we are on our journey. We don't have to be able to explain the parables, we don't have to be able to quote scripture, we don't need fancy seminary education (sorry, Pastor) in order to be in relationship with God. All we need to do is accept the invitation, love God with all our heart, mind, soul and strength, and love our neighbors as ourselves. Well, isn't that another easier said than done?

Continual Hope

2010-02-25T05:50:00.000-08:00

Although this chapter contains a pretty stern warning about severe reprimands to come if those sinners don't change their ways, we found the underlying message of Chapter 13 to be one of continual hope. Seriously! Paul restates his authority and reminds the consistently divided Corinthian church that authority comes from how his (and our) lives reflect the Good News and the Word. (I have to confess that I am getting tired of hearing that part.)

So what about the hope? Well, Paul points out again the concept of strength in weakness, and that's when it hit us. In humility and obedience Christ embraced the limitations of his full humanity and resisted the temptation to save himself. His "crucifixion in weakness" released the power of death to be used for God's purposes. And that is the hope - we don't have to be perfect! We can embrace our limitations, use them to draw power from God, use them to remind us that it is not our power/glory/agenda that matters, but God's.

And there is hope for the church as a whole. Paul never gave up on the Corinthians despite their continued bad behavior. He urges them to realize that they can incarnate God for one another and to stop wasting energy on division and dissent. by becoming unified and living in harmony they have great power, as we do. Of course, the opposite is true as well. We have power to do great damage to one another. So, in love and by accepting our limitations and faults as reminders that we NEED god, we can work together to move toward perfection, to make new disciples, to reveal the face of God for one another.

Join us in person next week as we "test drive" a series on the parables of Jesus!

Because I Said So!

2010-02-17T15:23:00.000-08:00

If you are a parent you have probably said those words, and as a child I am certain you heard them. What exasperated parent hasn't said that, at least once? It seemed to us that this is exactly what Paul wanted to say to the Corinthians. Paul is very personally invested in the church and loves them more than they know, but despairs that they are falling under the influence of the "Super Apostles." In the same way parents are grieved when their children follow a path that can only lead to heartache and trouble, Paul is grieved for the church at Corinth.

It really tickles my funny bone that he seems to be pretty sarcastic with them in this section. It made Paul seem more human and more like me. He begins by speaking of his own conversion experience in the third person and continues the track of "I don't want to boast but allow me to say..." That was a real sticking point for some of us, this false modesty. But others of us saw this as the natural outcome of his frustration with the Corinthians. He has already visited them twice, they are not paying anything toward his support as some other churches evidently are, he has written the "letter of tears" to jolt them back on course, and yet, here he is, writing them again! Good Grief! How many times do I have to tell you?! And to top it all off they are really paying attention to and beginning to follow his opponents who advocate strict adherence to the law as the way to salvation.

Paul concludes with a discussion of how our own weakness, and our recognition and acknowledgment of that weakness, leads us to find strength in God. As usual Paul's focus is God and Christ, not himself and his own accomplishments. In fact, when he does boast in the earlier passages it is not his accomplishments, travels, souls he has won that he presents but the humbling experiences, the beating and imprisonments. The things that point out his weakness and need for Christ. And the because-I-said-so from God can be found in verse 9, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (The Message) I guess I had better start listening...

Divine Jealousy

2010-02-03T14:01:00.000-08:00

You know, it is amazing to me that we could spend over an hour talking about 15 verses. We are back on track today, reading and talking about 2 Corinthians 11:1-15. It would seem that Paul has finally lost patience with the Corinthian church and his opponents because not only does he continue defending himself, he gets very sarcastic in this section.

Paul adopts the manner and method of his opponents in this section, boasting and explaining that he is boasting. We are sure that in the cultural context within which it was written the reference was clearly understood. He even calls his opponents "super apostles." Then Paul goes on to draw several comparisons - comparing the Corinthian church to a bride, to Eve, the "super apostles" to snakes and the Satan. But the term that really caught us was "divine jealousy." After much discussion we settled on the understanding that human jealousy is selfish, inwardly focused, concerned with self and what I get. Divine jealousy is outward focused, concerned with the other person, being in relationship with them and wanting the best for them. This is what God wants, means when He says in Exodus, "I am a jealous god."

That led to discussion of the current "feel-good" trend in churches and we were able to give voice to our concerns about the messages that sends about God. For those who don't see immediate financial reward the message is that God is exclusionary, punitive, and only with us in the good times. Do you really believe that? Seriously? Bad things do happen to good people, but I don't believe that every instance is because God is punitive, do you? And if Satan can appear as one of God's angels, as Paul contends, then how in the world are we supposed to know the difference?

It seems that we always have more questions than we have answers and that was what we settled on today. From this section we deduced that we need to be actively involved in inviting and welcoming people into relationship with God, learning together how to raise and live with our questions instead of trying to find an answer to each of them, and loving each other with a divine jealousy.

I AM Doing God's Work!

2010-01-27T18:57:00.000-08:00

Well, we managed all right today without our fearless leader, but we surely did miss her! We got back to 2 Corinthians reading and discussing chapter 10. Poor Paul, he is defending himself again. Some of our notes pointed out that there is such a change in tone that many people speculate that chapters 10-13 are part of a different letter, possibly even the letter of tears.

At any rate, we see Paul once again defending his authority, pointing out the flaws in the false apostles, the people who have been attacking him and stirring up the Corinthians. It seems that one of the main charges against Paul is that he is wishy-washy when speaking in person, but harsh and demanding when writing letters. We wondered about this, speculating that the false apostles may well have been Greeks, versed in oration and performance but short on substance and understanding. Paul, on the other hand was well schooled, a Pharisee, but physically unimpressive and not the best speaker. But in writing he could be brilliant. Paul points out that the false apostles seek to create followers of themselves and gain for themselves, while Paul receives no monetary benefit and ALWAYS focuses on Christ.

Paul consistently tries to remain humble, deflecting any adoration from himself to Christ. He points out his own suffering, trials, lack of material possession, and focus on Christ. He doesn't want to brag, but is forced to do so - at least a little bit. He gives us a good measure, even today, for looking at church with a critical eye. And it is a simple measure at that. What is the focus - is it God and spiritual reward, or is it immediate gratification in this life? Who is doing God's work?

Simply Known - I See You

2010-01-20T15:38:00.000-08:00

Our leader was busy, busy, busy with papers this week, so we looked at one of the topics she was working on to save her some time (and sanity:D). We read and discussed John 4:5-39, Jesus and the Samaritan woman at the well. First we talked about the stories that come before this section - Jesus teaching Nicodemus, John the Baptist, the baptism of Jesus. John was choosing people and situations to demonstrate a point, maybe the one he makes in 3:16?

The juxtaposition of Nicodemus and the Samaritan woman is curious. Nicodemus is a Pharisee, a teacher, someone with standing in the Jewish community, an insider who should know by virtue of all his study and learning just who Jesus is. And yet, he has difficulty comprehending Jesus as the Messiah and really gets hung up on the whole rebirth thing, not able to move beyond a literal, physical understanding. Nicodemus has every advantage in understanding but he just doesn't get it.

And then there is the woman. First all, her gender is a strike against her. And she is a Samaritan. Then we can assume she isn't well though of in her own community because she is going to the well in the heat of the day and alone. She is really an outsider! Yet Jesus initiates a conversation with her. Unheard of! It just isn't done! Jesus reveals that he know everything about her, and when he does she recognizes who he is.

And that brings us back to 3:16 and the word "everyone". It seems that John's point is that Jesus, the Living Water, God's salvation is for everyone - Pharisee and pariah, tax collector and disciple, Jewish man and Samaritan woman. All we need is faith - that is all the woman had when she went back into town to witness. She spread the word more quickly, more effectively and to more people than the powerful Nicodemus - simply because she believed.

So I guess we should remember that in our every day lives. We never know whom we will encounter, how our message will strike them or whether or not it will stay with them at all. In the movie "Avatar" the greeting of the Omaticaya means, "I see you." That is what we are called to do. As Jesus reminded the disciples, others have done the hard work of preparing and sowing. We need to do our part as reapers, by seeing and accepting everyone. Our witness can bring others into relationship with God and help fill our deep-seated human need to be seen, to be known, completely and wholly, and accepted and loved for who we are. That is what God offers all of us.

Giving Until It Hurts... Really?

2010-01-17T10:49:00.000-08:00

Again, sorry to be so late in getting this post up. I believe there were some things that were supposed to happen and figure into this post, that is why I procrastinated. (Nice rationalization, eh Cathi? This week we covered chapters 8 and 9 together. Seems like a lot of material, but the theme is consistent and coherent - giving and stewardship.

Boy, those are dirty words and even fighting words in some places, aren't they? Loaded with personal interpretation it seems difficult if not impossible to come to some common, non-confrontational understanding. Paul is addressing the church at Corinth regarding the very specific act of taking a collection to provide for relief of the church in Jerusalem that is suffering because of famine. Their suffering is compounded by the fact that by choosing to follow Christ many were disowned, discredited, and have lost their means of support - both economic and familial. This is real, human suffering and the Corinthians have been distracted by theological arguments within their own ranks. Seems pretty clear to us where the emphasis should be, but better look in the mirror first before we are tempted to condemn the Corinthians...

Paul is pretty consistent in the way he addresses things, seeking to assert his authority, divert any attention from himself to Jesus, sending an advance team of people the Corinthians trust and respect. He has all the administrative stuff down! And then the message, one I still need to hear, consider and understand.

Paul defines the riches we have without ever using the word money. I know I don't always acknowledge how rich I am in other terms. But it is so true, there are so many ways to think about how we are blessed. And - thank you Mr. Einstein - it is all relative. When we look at others who have "less" than we do we may be tempted to feel sorrow or pity, but they probably feel the same when they see people who have "less" than they do. So maybe the answer is that we need to not use others to define our gifts and blessings. We need only consider ourselves, our needs and then be thankful for what we do have. If I do that I know I have plenty, and that I can easily share with others.

It seems to me that we don't always correlate our relationship with personal finance with our relationship with God. Of course, as always, some of us are better at this than others. Why do we not see the relationship between what we give to the church - time, talent, money - and the church being able to God's work. And why do we continue to see our money as a means of control, of voicing our pleasure and displeasure with actions and policies. True, it is the main way we voice concerns in our consumer-driven society. But in church? And if we aren't behaving in church the way we do in society, then is the church relevant? If the church isn't relevant to our society and culture then how can we ever hope to deliver the Message? And if we are immersed in the current culture, how do we keep from being corrupted by it? Paul sees thing very clearly and simply, wish I did too...

Living in the Light

2010-01-17T06:31:00.000-08:00

Sorry, this is not the post from Wednesday's meeting. Getting caught up from a trip and getting kids back to college has been eating up my time. I promise, this afternoon. Meanwhile, here is an interim post on the challenge from our pastor to live as people of the light, doing what God calls us to do, and God hitting me up side the head with a 2 x 4....

Last Saturday we had kids coming in town from college and one child had planned a family outing to see Avatar in 3D. She was VERY excited for us to all go together as she had seen the regular version, her sister had seen it in 3D and the other two were... apathetic. We met at the mall theater, they were already in line, and as luck would have it the show sold out two customers in front of us. Well, the apathetic ones were still apathetic, the one who had already seen it was also nonplussed, but the planner was beside herself with disappointment. In fact, for a time she was speechless!! We managed to salvage the evening with some light shopping and an ice cream. All in all some good family time.

Next day our planner wanted to go back, but by then the apathy group had made other plans. I still wanted to see the movie so I went with her, back to the mall. We were cutting the time a little close and the parking lot was a mess with giant piles of snow everywhere, so I dropped her off to go get tickets while I parked the car.

Parking the car was NO FUN. There were people everywhere and giant piles of snow in the middle of the aisles and you couldn't see the lines so cars were parked every which way. As I moved pretty far away from the entrance I came across a little girl in a big car who looked frightened, trying to get out of a parking spot so I let her go in front of me. It was getting really close to time for the movie and I was beginning to get agitated. She headed down an aisle where I could see a parking spot so I followed her. About halfway down she stopped, one of those giant piles of snow on her left, cars parked too far into the aisle on her right. From behind her I could see it was a tight fit, but she had plenty of room. She put her car in reverse, I saw the back up lights and looked in my rear view mirror. There were already three more cars behind me. I sat in my car saying some not nice things, she looked askance, I shrugged, we were stymied. After a few minutes of this I put my car in park and approached in as non-threatening a way as I could (you never know who you are talking to in this day and age, it seems). I explained there were more cars behind me, she needed to go forward. She was really afraid to damage anyone else's car and then it FINALLY came to me! (Man, can I ever be stupid sometimes) I walked in front of her and directed her like those guys on the ground at the airport only I didn't get the cute headphones and flashlight cones :-(. She got through, we all got through, I found a parking place, arrived in plenty of time and thoroughly enjoyed the movie.

So, it didn't hurt me one bit to take a minute, see someone else's distress and do something to help out. Isn't that what we are called to do? In the face of this week's tragedy it makes doing something bigger seem a good and easy goal. Living in the light - easier said than done but well worth the effort!

Godly Grief

2010-01-08T07:42:00.000-08:00

Welcome back, and happy New Year. I am a little late in posting, delayed by a snowstorm and cold that diverted my attention. This week we re-read 2 Corinthians 2:12-13 and then forged ahead with 7:5-16. It seemed that Paul was saying I don't want to boast, but let me boast any way. I guess he really was human! This passage refers back to the letter of tears, about which we know very little except that it was precipitated by conflict within the church caused by a group of followers who advocated strict adherence to the Mosaic laws. Paul addresses his grief in writing the letter, the grief the church must have felt in receiving it, the remorse, guilt, on and on. But what is the difference between a "godly grief' and human grief?

Paul points out how the grief and sorrow that the Corinthians felt brought them into closer relationship with God. It brought about change in how they see and do things, in their behavior and beliefs. It seems that is the main distinction between "godly grief" and human grief. Human grief is merely the guilt at getting caught, it brings about no change. It is the difference between regret and remorse. But, maybe we need to experience human sorrow and regret before we can move on to be remorseful and change...

Paul took quite a risk in sending his letters to the church at Corinth. What if they didn't respond as he intended, what if they moved away from God? Paul says that he struggled with many issues, had doubts, questions. So did just about every other major actor in the Bible, the reluctantly called, the persecuted. How much of a risk do we take in the church today? How much room do we allow for people who question? For doubt? For beliefs that don't necessarily line up with what we think should be? And what about seeing conflict within the church as a way of experiencing "godly grief' and moving closer to God and his desires for our lives? It all depends on deep and abiding relationships, where we genuinely care for each other and want to maintain and deepen the relationship. In an era of shallow relationships that can be really scary...

Happy New Year!

2010-01-03T06:46:00.000-08:00

Just posting a reminder that we will resume with 2 Corinthians on Wednesday, January 6th. Come join us!

Merry Christmas - and Thank You!

2009-12-24T05:21:00.000-08:00

Well, we are off until January 6th, but did want to take this opportunity to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas. I think a few posts back I shared that I was having difficulty this season, dealing with much loss around me. A dear friend shared some wisdom he received when going through a similar time. He said be grateful for the time that you did have. Focus on the good. It is difficult for a grateful heart to remain sad for long. Now, I tell my kids that all the time and yet I can't seem to follow through on it myself!

So this is my thankful list(or me kicking myself in the seat!) - my family is almost all together, healthy and relatively happy. We have enough to eat and presents to share. Our friends overseas appear to be healthy and relatively safe. Those around us who have lost loved ones have found a way to celebrate the small miracles in their journey, providing us with inspiration. Our extended family is well and celebrating the season. We have plans with friends in the coming weeks. Our house is clean and as soon as I finish this the groceries will be bought. And now that I think of it, there are so many more things I could list but this is enough. Go enjoy your time, and may you find peace, joy and gratefulness this holiday season.

Location, Location, Location!

2009-12-17T05:15:00.000-08:00

If you have ever taken an English (or Language Arts) class you may remember that in telling and reporting stories the setting is very important. It highlights and adds to the depth of understanding that we are able to achieve. Think about a recent news story you heard, and then change the setting and see how that changes the way you understand and interpret the event. And the setting doesn't just include the physical aspects, but the sociological structures as well. This week we deepened our understanding of the birth story by looking at its setting.

Christ lived and ministered during the Pax Romana, a peace that was gained and maintained through violence and suppression of peoples just to the point of rebellion. Many of the titles for the Emperor were the same ones used for Jesus, and, in fact, the Romans believed that humans could become divine. It was a society organized around a patronage system that kept 80% of the population at the subsistence level. Many of these at the bottom were considered expendable - tradesmen (like carpenters), prostitutes, tax collectors. In an agricultural society you could always find or train another carpenter or low level tax collector, but you really needed those guys who were caring for and harvesting your crops.

So, within that 80% there was this subgroup getting the message that there was no room for them in the Roman kingdom. And those were the people with whom Jesus spent most of his time, and to whom he gave the message that there IS a place for them in God's kingdom. Hmmmm.... What a political and economic threat that posed! Think of it, rousing 80% of the population to rebel. We have seen it happen many times since then, and it is never pretty or easy.

No wonder the Roman officials took the extreme steps they did when they couldn't find the baby at his birth. The Roman peace was peace through violence, but Jesus is peace through justice.I think I speak for our entire group when I wish you the peace of Jesus, today and always.

Merry Flexibility

2009-12-08T18:37:00.000-08:00

Well, we won't be meeting again this week as our leader has been called away, some of us are facing significant challenges with our families and who couldn't use a little extra time this month?

I am personally struggling with being happy and thankful this season when I see friends in great pain and struggling through loss. I sent out two sympathy cards this week, attended a third visitation, have two more friends with critically ill family members and am wondering what is the message I am missing? I know, I know, we don't always get to know the reason for the experiences we have. But right now I really do need to know why. Why so much loss, right now, right here? How can I be thankful for what I have without feeling so incredibly guilty that I do have what I have?

The answer if faith. Faith that God works for good, that He wants what is best for each one of us, that He will use the bad things that happen to create good. Maybe it goes back to the beginning of 2 Corinthians when Paul talked about going through suffering so that we could comfort others who suffer. Maybe I am learning coping skills that I will pass on to others. Maybe, just maybe I will be able to simply listen to one of my friends who is suffering and by listening provide some comfort. But seriously, this is much easier to write than it is to live...

Peace and blessings to you this week.

Christmas Stories

2009-12-02T19:15:00.000-08:00

Welcome back! We didn't meet last week for several reasons, and beginning this week we will take a break from 2 Corinthians and looking at the Christmas story from different perspectives. We all know the story, from pageants, sermons, services, songs, storybooks. But do we really know the story?

We started out by reading Luke 1:2-2:39. Why Luke? Well, it is one of two places you can find the birth story(the other being Matthew 1:18-2:23), it is the most "familiar" story, and it contains much more detail than Matthew. One thing we didn't discuss in much depth is why there isn't a birth story in John and Mark. Guess we will save that for another day. We did look for and discuss anything that jumped out at us that we hadn't noticed before. We talked about how special John the Baptist was, how he was set apart from everyone even before he was conceived. We noted that the WOMEN are not only mentioned, they are central to the narrative and they are NAMED! We considered the parallel between the Abraham/Sarah story and Zechariah/Elizabeth, as well as Elijah and John the Baptist. Then we contrasted the birth story in Luke with the story as recorded in Matthew. What a difference!

So, why so different? Probably marketing. Think about the intended audience of the writers. Matthew was a Jew writing for Jews, so tying everything back to the traditions and telling the story in a traditional way would be most important for him. Luke, on the other hand, was a gentile writing for gentiles, working on including EVERYONE in the new church. A church struggling to be cohesive and yet inclusive. The level of detail and point of view don't change the story or how it happened, they merely change the way we hear and understand it. I found this idea strangely comforting, mainly because it supports my understanding of a God who constantly and consistently reaches out to all of us. God wants to be in relationship with us and changes how he reaches out to us, giving every opportunity to respond to His grace. Can you hear him reaching out to you in the birth story?

Balance, balance...

2009-11-18T17:55:00.000-08:00

I appeal to some of our other members to post comments to correct and augment this week's post. I arrived a bit late because of an early appointment that ran late. This week we discussed last week's topic, especially 6:11-7:4 that deals with the difference between believers and nonbelievers. Paul has very high standards and expectations for believers which include witnessing and being accountable to self, others, and God.

On one hand Christ (and Paul) expects us to go and make disciples in all the lands. But we are also to avoid everything that defiles or distracts us. how do we remain accountable and still be open and accepting? And if we try to distinguish between the things that defile or distract and the people we are trying make into disciples, are we being judgmental? Yikes! Somebody help me figure this out!

New Life

2009-11-11T19:14:00.000-08:00

In 2 Corinthians 6:3-7:4 Paul is again defending his authority and encouraging the Corinthians to persevere. He describes the trials and tribulations, the tools of the trade, and warns against the dangers that he has and the Christians will face. But, if you consider his words on a different level, he is also describing a New Life in The New Covenant.

Remember, the Corinthians were living in a pagan society, full of sin and vice. (Sound familiar?) In verses 6:3-6:13 Paul talks about the trials he has personally faced, and the virtues that have helped him endure. Throughout this section he juxtaposes positive and negative to show us that while we may feel persecuted and hopeless, there is always something good that comes our of it. Like the Velveteen Rabbit, I imagine those trials are just God loving our fur off.

Verses 6:14-7:1 have been considered a digression, but to me it seems more a reminder that we are each a temple. The New Covenant is about taking the laws into our hearts rather than keeping them written on stone tablets. It is about living our faith every minute of every day. If God is to dwell within us, what kind of vessel must we provide? That is exactly what Paul describes in this section. We need to live a New Life in order to be part of the New Covenant, and Paul cautions us to beware of those who profess to believe but whose actions do not support their words, as well as those who reject God.

The one thing Paul doesn't tell us is how to know the difference. We decided that it requires discernment, listening for God's quiet voice. Only then can we know that we are on the right path, doing God's work and remaining cheerful and joyful while persevering through struggles. Does anyone have a hearing aid I can borrow...?

Reconcile Yourself...

2009-11-04T20:02:00.000-08:00

In 2 Corinthians 5:11-6:2 we found a continuation of some themes. Paul continues to defend his authority and ministry, but as always deflects and glory or praise, focusing on God as the source of everything. Paul's reiterates that his ministry is based on the life, death and resurrection of Jesus for E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E. Although God offers us grace there are consequences and judgment to be faced. And Paul again describes sacrificial Christian love.

But the majority of our discussion today centered on two concepts - we are acting as ambassadors for Christ (5:20) and reconciliation (5:18). We explored what it means to us to be "Ambassadors for Christ." The definition we settled on is that how you live your life is a testimony to your beliefs and faith. We agreed that you communicate God's glory with your life. But then the next question is what are you going to do this week to "live for Christ.?" Our discussion naturally led us to those outstanding examples that awe and amaze us - the successful lawyer who chucks it all to become a pastor, the couple who abandon a comfortable retirement to become missionaries halfway around the world, Saul becoming Paul... That kind of intimidation (yes, intimidation) makes anything I can do so insignificant that it is almost not worth the effort. Almost. We decided that even small acts communicate our testimony - going to Bible Study, going to church, keeping our devotional time, prayer, helping our neighbor. We need not be intimidated by those grand examples, we are not all called to be extreme, we are simply called to be faithful.

Reconciliation was an important concept to the Corinthians, coming from such a mixed background. What does reconcile mean? According to the dictionary it meas to cause to be friendly or harmonious, to conform, t o accommodate, come to terms with, reunite. Several of us liked the idea of harmony because, as in music, each of us can be different and an individual, singing our own song, but when we come together in harmony the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. One of us liked the synonym reunite, feeling it conveyed the idea of having once been in relationship with God, having broken that relationship and then repairing it. No where in the Bible does it speak of God being reconciled to man. In fact, it is always the other way around - man must be reconciled to God. God's work is done, he offers us grace. As Paul says in 6:1-2, it is here, it is now, it is up to us to respond.

Becoming Real... Christians

2009-10-28T14:23:00.000-07:00

In Margery Willams’ The Velveteen Rabbit, the Skin Horse teaches the Velveteen Rabbit what it is to become real. In 2 Corinthians 4:7-5:10 Paul is teaching the Corinthians what it is to become a real Christian. (You can read the entire text of The Velveteen Rabbit at http://digital.library.upenn.edu/women/williams/rabbit/rabbit.html)

Paul has been addressing the Corinthians to encourage them in the face of their suffering and persecution. Remember, they are facing pain and persecution that we cannot even imagine today. Paul clearly refutes the common belief that suffering is a punishment, the result of having done something to offend God. In fact, he says that God uses our suffering to draw us closer to him, and that through our suffering His glory is revealed. A difficult concept to grasp, and even harder to embrace.

One of us gave an example that made it a little easier to understand. Think about your favorite _______(jacket, shirt, jeans, blanket) or a child's "lovie." When you look at it without knowing its attachment you may think it is an old, dilapidated thing. but it is so loved by the owner. It may seem shabby, but to the owner it is beautiful and precious. In the same way we may seem shabby, worn, tattered by life's trials, but to God we are beautiful, precious, and loved more than our mortal minds can comprehend.

Paul goes on to say that when we persevere and triumph over our trials, we not only learn about ourselves, our faith, and God's love, but we also reveal his glory to others. Now, this part I get. We all know someone who has suffered or is suffering greatly, but is sustained and comforted by a faith that makes us marvel. That renews my faith that when I suffer God will be with me. Doesn't it do the same for you?

This section ends with a cautionary note, though. We might be tempted to think that if we accept Jesus we can then just wait through whatever comes our way for the reward that comes in the next life. Paul is very clear in describing the reward that awaits us, but he also repeats that carrying the message forward, persevering through our difficulties, and loving each other is what God calls us to do. He calls it "...cheerfully pleasing God..." As Methodists we got this part,because it fits in with Wesley's concepts of sanctification and "going on to perfection." And that is just what we will keep working on - becoming real, going on to perfection, and living as God calls us to live.