It has been a really long time since I have written. Not just here, anywhere. A part of my rationalization has to do with life getting in the way. It happens to all of us. Issues surrounding health, family, finances, travel, injuries... the list goes on. But when I took the time to strip away all of those excuses, I discovered that I had paralyzed myself with unrealistic expectations. I expected perfection and a post for every sermon, and if I couldn't go back to the last post I made and start from there and comment on each week, then I wasn't going to write anything. Instead of motivation, those expectations turned out to be a powerful anesthetic that put me into a state of inertia I feared I could not overcome.
Today I am determined to take action, so I gave myself permission to start from today. The chain is imperfect, I have let some really good, inspirational sermons go by the wayside, but I am moving forward.
This week's sermon, based on Matthew 28:16-20 was titled Reclaiming the Great Commission. The pastor started out by asking us how well we do what we are told to do. Most of us snickered, including myself. Someone telling me what to do usually guarantees that I will do the exact opposite. In this last chapter of Matthew, though, most everyone is obedient and does what they are told. Pilate listens to the Pharisees and high priests. When he tells them to post their own guards at the tomb, they do it. When they tell the guards to watch the tomb, they do it. When the angel tells the women to deliver a message to the disciples, they do it. When the guards report the body is gone, they are told to lie, and they do it. Or do they? In verse 15 it says, "15 So
the soldiers took the money and did as they were instructed. And this
story has been widely circulated among the Jews to this very day."
The question our pastor asked was, if they all took the money and lied about what happened, then how do we know this story and circulate it to this very day? There must have been at least one of them who leaked the story. I wonder why? What was his motivation? Was he more afraid of a God that could use an earthquake and angel to show the reclamation of His Son than he was of his superiors? Did he come to believe? Did he think it would change the outcome? Since it isn't reported, or even a topic of comment I can only assume that the motivation wasn't important. It was the action that mattered.
Looking at the scripture, The Great Commission, what does Jesus tell his disciples? All actions - Go-Baptize-Teach. But, He doesn't tell the disciples to go like He did, to baptize like John, to teach as Jesus did. Jesus doesn't tell the disciples to work perfectly, without error. Nothing in this passage describes HOW they are to work, just that they are to go, to baptize, to teach. He just tells them to do it.
But, and this is a big but, He gives them this assurance - "I am with you always, to the very end of the age." The implication here is that they don't have to know how to do their work, just what to do. If they proceed, move forward, and take action, then they can trust that Jesus is with them, always and to the end of the age. God will take care of the quality of their efforts. I don't have to have the perfect, inspirational, life-changingly perfect post. I just need to do it. (I can't help it, every time I say that I see a Nike Swoosh.) And then have faith, trust that what I do will be used for good.
Here is my story of acting and having faith (even though I didn't, not really). I visit a friend who has days when they are largely unrepsonsive, appearing to not have any awareness of the current time, place or surroundings. Or even that I am there or who I am. I was reading through the service from this week, following the bulletin as faithfully as I could with no reponse at all. Most of the time when we get to the Lord's Prayer my friend will reach out for a hand to hold and join in, but on this day there was absolutely nothing. No glimmer of recognition. But when we came to the scripture and got to, Therefore go..." my friend joined in and recited the remainder word for word!
This is a familiar scripture, but I don't know too many people (non-clergy) who could recite it word for word off the top of their head. I feel that this time I got to see and feel a result of my actions. I am almost never that lucky, but these glimpses and glimmers of the power of our God help me to remember when I get to the dark and depressing times. We don't need to know everything, we just need to understand and do what we know we are supposed to:
19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
