Looking for God

A couple of weeks ago I went to what is probably my favorite concert of the year.  At the concert the performer talked about his bilingual six year old who knows that a door is a door, and a puerta is a puerta, and they are the same thing, and they just are. That led me to contemplate - you don't have to understand God or how God works to know and believe that God is present with us.  God just is.  I find, however, that if I don't make time to think about it, I begin to take God for granted.  God is always there, God is miraculous, I need to clean that bathroom...God just is...

A few days after that concert I attended a small group class designed to help keep  focus and balance during the holidays.  We started with a quote from CS Lewis: "Learning to recognize God's presence in all of life, in pain as well as pleasure, in disappointment as well as fulfillment, in fear as well as peace -- requires discipline, a discerning heart, and a keen sensitivity to the Holy Spirit."  It echoed the thoughts I had already had about paying attention, listening, watching, being conscious of the presence and activity of God. But Lewis didn't tell me how to do that.  Where is my Google Map to achieving that discipline, that discerning heart and that keen sensitivity?

We then looked through a series of photos to choose one that spoke to us personally. I chose:

 

After selecting a photo we were asked to consider a series of question as they related to the picture, the principal question being what does it reveal about the nature of God?  As I reflected on the questions I realized that although I chose based on gut feeling, when I paused to consciously think about it what really spoke to me was the tenderness with which the soldier holds the child, and yet, as a soldier it is likely that he has killed people.  Although he holds the child like a father, he maintains a clinical detachment with the blue gloves.  It is clearly cold and yet the child is barefoot.  There are a number of soldiers in the background, but none of them can be seen caring for others.  It is a picture of dichotomies, oppositional states of being that I really have to think about in order to reconcile them.

In much the same way Lewis juxtaposed pain and pleasure, disappointment and fulfillment, fear and peace, making God all-encompassing.  This picture conveyed that same message for me on this day.  But, it may say something different on a different day, or to a different person, in a different place.  It's OK to know that God is God, but I really do need to look around, pay attention, and recognize that God is with us in the light and in the dark, in the good and the bad, in joy and disappointment... in all things.

Change

This blog started as a way for our women's Bible study group to stay in touch.  As life required us to move in and out of the group from week to week, we could touch base and keep up with the study here.  Then life started moving us out of the group, until our membership dwindled, our commitment faded,  and we disbanded.  Change.  The writing focus shifted to contemplating the message from the sermons on a weekly basis.  Change.  It has been a long time since I've written about that, though. I could cite many reasons - family commitments, work, yada-yada-yada.  We all know those are not reasons, they are excuses.   If I am completely honest (with myself) the real reason is emptiness.  Emptiness of spirit and soul.

I believe that we all go through seasons like this in our lives.  I am not unique or special.  This is not the first or the last time I will feel this.  The challenge is in how we face and cope with it, and I have been struggling with that process for some time now.  For a long time - years - I have felt a strong call to either be an agent of change or to make a change.  It has become crystal clear to me that I have failed as an agent of change, so it is time to make a change.

So, one part of the changes I will be making is to move from recapping sermons to writing that is just me.  That is more than a little scary.  It was easier to rehash meetings or sermons.  Now I am responsible for the content - all of it.  And yet, as soon as I made that decision a topic presented itself so clearly that I couldn't miss it if I tried.  So stay tuned, I am working on making sense of it and getting it down coherently.  And I am working on embracing, liking, loving change.  I hope you will choose to come along with me.

Jesus' Healing Ministry-Capernaum

One of my favorite healing stories involves a paralyzed man whose friends desperately wanted to take him to Jesus.  The story is found in Mark 2 and more than likely it took place in Capernaum, probably Peter’s house.

Several men had heard that Jesus was a healer.  They had a friend who was sick, paralyzed, unable to walk.  They put him on a stretcher and lowered him through the roof.  I can almost hear Peter howling at these men as the dust and dried mud began to fall on the heads and his roof is torn apart.  All the gospels report this story the same way:

“Jesus, seeing their faith, said to the man, “Your sins are forgiven. Get up and take your mat and walk.”

The man never says a word.  We know nothing about his faith.  It was the faith of the friends that impress Jesus.  How many of you have friends who have picked you up and ripped off the roof for you?

In every one of the Gospel healing stories, we find that Jesus made a point of noticing and stopping to heal these sick people.  Jesus was constantly looking for the sick and oppressed.  He had a heart for them.  This is what we see as he stayed up all night at Peter’s home to heal the sick and cast out demons.

There are people all around us who are sick or oppressed.  And as we are invited to walk in the footsteps of Jesus, we are invited to look for them; to seek them out.  There are people who are paralyzed by fear, addiction, grief, losses of all kinds, even loss of direction.  They need us to rip off the roof so they can hear the words of Jesus “Your sins are forgiven.  Take up your mat and walk.”

----Pastor Suzanne

Where in the World?

As a kid I was fascinated with geography.  Like most middle class families of the time we had a set of encyclopedias that came from the grocery store, buying one volume each month or so.  In the back of one volume there was a table listing every country in the world (at that time) along with the official language, population, state religion, monetary unit, and a synopsis of prominent geographical features.  I read and reread and memorized those facts, thinking that somehow knowing that information would bring me closer to escaping the small, isolated town in which I lived.  I would be transported to one of those magical, far away places.  I never made a magical journey, but I think memorizing those facts allowed me to subconsciously internalize the understanding that geography strongly influenced the development of civilizations and cultures, of people.
 

Until now I never thought about geography and it's impact on the stories of the Bible. This week's sermon was based on Mark 1:9-13, the baptism and temptation of Jesus, a passage that not only reveals Jesus as the Son of God but also ties together the prophecies and stories of the Old Testament and the New Testament through both the actors and the setting.  The baptism takes place in the Jordan River, at the same spot where the Israelites crossed a muddy river into the Promised Land.  John and Elijah both begin and end their ministry in Jericho.  Elijah got into trouble with a king and queen and so did John.  The baptism and temptation take place in the wilderness, the same wilderness where the Israelites wandered, where Elijah fasted for forty days, where Jesus fasted and was tempted
In addition to the scripture narrative, this sermon series is accompanied by video excerpts from "The Way" by Adam Hamilton.  One thing that struck me from the video, from actually seeing the Jordan River and the wilderness, was that it would be very difficult to tell what decade, or century you are in.  Being from Missouri I would be hard pressed to call the spot on the Jordan River that was filmed "lush"... until you see the wilderness.  There is also the contrast between the clean,structured, fabricated ritual baths and the overgrown, muddy, shallow river.    It is one thing to read and think you know what a place is like.  It is another thing altogether to see it, feel it, smell it and use the texture that setting provides to inform your understanding.

Another thing that struck me was the absolute barrenness of the wilderness.  We know how many distractions there are in every moment of every day, but even in the non-digital ages, there appeared to be no distractions in this wilderness.  You could easily strip away all the superficial, visual, cultural "bling" and get down the the bare bones of relationships, purpose, life.

  Studying those encyclopedias gave me knowledge, but not understanding.  It seems to me that in living, being, doing we weave ourselves into the fabric of our surroundings, we become part of the geography and that colors how we see and understand everything.  For today I am wondering if the take-away for me is to understand how geography influences the scripture of the Bible, or how my geography influences my understanding of life?

Jesus Wept

Sometimes my procrastination is simply procrastination, and sometimes it is designed to mesh with other events in order to help clarify my understanding.  I didn't really even process the sermon from June 9 - "Jesus Wept" - for whatever reason.  And then I learned of the passing of a friend who moved away, with whom I had been in touch intermittently since she left, and the passage and sermon took on new significance for me.

There are lots of significant details in this passage from John 11, all of them with layers upon layers of meaning.  There is the juxtaposition of Lazarus' tombstone being in place, while Jesus' tombstone had already been rolled away.  Lazarus emerged still bound, Jesus' bindings were left behind in the tomb.  Jesus tarried, or waited to return to Bethany.  Mary and Martha varied in their reaction, but not in their expression of faith and belief.

But the big question in this passage seems to be why did Jesus weep?  There are many interpretations and suggestions out there - compassion for the suffering of his friends, tears of anger and longing over sin, the inner distress Jesus must have felt knowing that the cross was only days away, the knowledge that raising Lazarus would be the trigger that would lead to his own death, and I just read an opinion that Jesus wept in order to identify himself with Jeremiah, "the weeping prophet."

I tried to land on one reason that Jesus wept, but the more I thought about it, the more I thought maybe it isn't about the reason Jesus wept but what that action says to you today, right where you are in your faith journey.  I know it is important to read and understand the scripture, but the more I do it the more I think the real value comes in contemplating the back story and then applying it to your own circumstances.  I often feel so inadequate and ignorant of all the scholarly things, but I believe each one of us has it in us to figure out what the message is today, in this place, at this time for me and me alone.  And that is enough.  Today it tells me that God knows we are sorry to lose someone we love, that God feels and understands our suffering, that it is OK to feel that sorrow, and that in the end it will be OK.

There were a whole lot of people in this story, and they were all in a different place when it came to their faith.  But Jesus interacts with them where they are, and they each take away a different, personal understanding of what Jesus says and does.  It is about a very real, very personal, very unique relationship with God.  

Getting off the Fence

Well, I am officially an idiot and just deleted all of my notes on this week's sermon.  Ever happen to you?  I remember the pastor talked about this passage from Galatians 1:1-12 being about distorting the gospel.  The Galatians were Judaizers, trying to force converts to become Jews before they could become Christians, but Paul is telling them that God really doesn't care about that and even calls their insistence on the two-step process a perversion of the gospel.

I felt for the Galatians.  They were probably just trying to do their best.  After all, they didn't have the miraculous conversion experience that Paul had.  You have to work from what you have and know, and the Law and Tradition were the basis for their understanding of the gospel, not the New Testament.  So, it is not to hard to see how they could make a wrong turn or detour.  Then this letter comes from Paul.  I have to confess that based on my life experiences I hear, "Tsk, tsk, tsk.  Shamey-shamey-shame on you."  I can even see him giving the little finger swipe I absolutely hated as a kid.  I feel embarassed, guilty, disgraced... a whole bunch of negative emotions.  That got me wondering if I could read this passage from a different point of view.  What if Paul was trying to make a loving correction?  Hard to see that when he is cursing folks - twice!  Maybe he was having a bad day.

Or maybe what has Paul so worked up is that he clearly sees, based on his own blinding and enlightening experience, that God is doing a new thing.  God is doing a new thing not just in the Paul, but in the world.  The Galatians have trapped themselves, their souls, inside a box built of experience and expectations and tradition.  They taped it securely shut with fear - fear of the new and unknown.  Fear of people with whom they have never associated, and who they do not understand.  Fear of sharing the gospel.  Fear of articulating and professing their own individual faith.  Maybe Paul's message is not "Shame on you" but "Go out, meet people.  Share the gospel."  I bet they would have also liked that angel who popped up in other places, offering the encouraging, "Do not be afraid..."  I know I would.

Lady Wisdom

In Proverbs 8:1-4 and 22-31 a most unusual character steps to the front of our biblical stage this week, so unusual that no one seems to be able to explain exactly who (or even what) she is--except that she's definitely a "she" - "Woman Wisdom," "Lady Wisdom," or, as Eugene Peterson translates it, "Madame Insight."  While we modern day Christians are not as familiar with her, the early disciples would have known her well.  They had no "New" Testament yet, so the Old Testament was the Bible that nourished the first Christians. Proverbs in particular would have been a common and practical resource for them.

But what does "Lady Wisdom" have to say to us in our modern day context?  First I want to highlight to "whom" she addresses herself.  She stands right in the most public of places--at the crossroads, at the city gate, in the doorways--and not in some secluded place where secret teachings are shared with a select few. No, this teaching is clearly for everyone, for her cry "is to all that live" (v. 4). Eugene Peterson's translation in The Message brings this image to life: "She's taken her stand at First and Main, at the busiest intersection. Right in the city square where the traffic is thickest, she shouts, 'You--I'm talking to all of you, everyone out here on the streets!'"  We forget that the God we serve makes wisdom accessible to all by surrounding us with it every day, everywhere.

Case in point, the source of wisdom in our passage today is found in the order of God's creation.  Our passage is filled with the sense that God's Wisdom established the way things are, not blind chance, or random events, or the outcome of some primeval conflict, or a detached god. The problem is that in the midst of our very over stimulated, technological culture, we have lost the art of simply paying attention! "When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars that you have established; what are human beings that you are mindful of them, mortals that you care for them?" (Psalm 8)

"Lady Wisdom" also points out that the source of wisdom can also be found in everyday life, in the act of everyday living.  J. Phillip Newell writes: "God is to be found not by stepping aside from the flow of daily life into religious moments and environments, or by looking away from creation to a spiritual realm beyond, but rather by entering attentively the depths of the present moment. There we will find God, wherever we may be and whatever we may be doing."  And Barbara Brown Taylor writes; "Wisdom, is not gained by knowing what is right. Wisdom is gained by practicing what is right, and noticing what happens when that practice succeeds and when it fails. Wise people do not have to be certain what they believe before they act. They are free to act, trusting that the practice itself will teach them what they need to know.”

In the midst of tornadoes that ravage people's lives, wars that still are being fought, violence that pervades our headlines and complications of simply being; Lady Wisdom invites humanity to engage in a joyful search for God's dynamic presence through and in the world. God willing, the process of seeking the divine in the world and in each other just might drive out some of the darkness.

----Pastor Suzanne

Paradox of Pentecost

Acts 2:1-21

 

Honestly, I suspect that we've all heard the story of the wind and the tongues-of-flame and the dove and the crowds-hearing-the-sermon-in-their-own-languages just enough to believe that the promise of Pentecost is deliverance, celebration, victory, and strength. The signs of Pentecost, after all, are mighty. And what is the Holy Spirit if it is not God's own agent -- the very Spirit of the resurrected Jesus -- now on earth to accompany us with signs of wonder and power.

Except that precisely because the promised Holy Spirit is the presence of the crucified and resurrected Christ, we should never expect things to be so easy. In the cross of Christ, we see God's strength mediated through suffering, God's victory achieved through defeat, and new life pledged and provided through death. The crucified and resurrected God we meet in Jesus is a God of paradox, and so we should look for no less in God's Holy Spirit.

The Holy Spirit doesn't prevent failure but invites it. Or, to put it slightly differently, the Holy Spirit invites us to find fulfillment and victory in and through our setbacks and failures.  "I tell my kids to make a mistake every day -- just not the same mistake!" Each mistake, each set back, each false start, each failure is not to be lamented by learned from.

This perspective grants a measure of freedom to throw ourselves into lost causes, to take risks for the sake of the mission, and to take great risks and dare great ventures. Why? Because we trust that whatever the immediate results of our efforts, both our hopes and our future are secured not by our abilities but by God's good promise. Resurrection, we need to remember, only and always follows crucifixion.

-----Pastor Suzanne

Crossing the River

The sermon this week focused on the courage that Paul and the disciples showed, fearlessly going somewhere they probably didn’t really want to go, and how our church is also being called in a different direction.  Each one of us is challenged every day and offered opportunities to change direction, to be brave.  (I have a great story about that but it doesn’t fit here.  I’ll save it for another day.)  But as I tried and tried to think this through, nothing intelligent or even coherent came to my mind for this post, so I went back to the scripture: Acts 16:9-15.

This section is titled Lydia's Conversion in Phillipi, but to my untrained, unschooled eye that title is a disservice to Lydia.  In verse 14 it clearly says "She was a worshipper of God."  Now, why would she need converting if she was already a worshipper?  That title influences how we read and understand this passage, focusing us on the product - Lydia's conversion - rather than the process.  The disciples' journey leading up to and in this passage is all about process, not product.

So now some thoughts are coming to me.  I think it is important to acknowledge that the process by which we make disciples may change, depending on what river we have to cross and what unknown, scary territory into which we are called, but some parts will remain the same.  So, what did Paul do “right?”  What might be the process lessons for me?

He was willing to wander aimlessly, without direction, and take no for an answer more times than he could count.  When he finally got a call, a vision, he paid attention and did what he understood he was supposed to do.  He acted, he crossed the river.  He went to a new, unexpected and hostile place.  (This made me remember how Noah ran away when God called him to go someplace difficult.)  Then, on the Sabbath did he take the disciples to the synagogue?  No, they went outside the city, where they expected to find a place of prayer, and they worshipped where they were.  They went out to meet people where they were, and then had the patience to step back and wait.  They didn’t know or have any indication what the outcome would be, they just spoke to the people there, shared the gospel with the faith that it would make disciples.

I don’t know about you, but I am always impatient to see results.  It seems that everything we do today is about accountability, about concrete, measurable, quantifiable outcomes.  But over many years, and thanks to many two-by-fours up side my head, I have learned to accept that most of the time I just need to do what I think I am supposed to do.  Period.  Every once in a while I will get to see the fruits, just as Paul and the disciples did when Lydia and her entire household were baptized.  And sometimes I need to look in the mirror for the results.  Sometimes we are changed by the opportunities and challenges we accept

The Invitation of New Opportunity

Reflecting back on the sermon each week (sometimes) opens my mind up to considering structural elements that I normally wouldn't notice.  Like how the pastor can take a passage that I identify with in a very negative way and turn it into a positive and uplifting message, even in the title.  The Invitation of a New Opportunity sounds so great.  When I read Acts 11:1-18, though,I see the wagging finger of shame.  Probably because I would really like to be Peter, but most strongly identify with the "circumcised believers." 

I think you can read this passage from two points of view.  First, what did Peter do wrong, in the opinion offered here by his peers?  He went to people who were outside their circle; he didn't first convert them to Judaism; he ate with them and became unclean; he acted unilaterally; he didn't follow "the rules."  What did Peter do right?  He went to people outside his circle; he didn't require them to be like him before he shared God's word and love; he shared the intimacy of a meal with them; he didn't wait for permission, or for the conditions to be perfect; he disregarded the rules as they existed at that time in order to follow the call to make disciples.  Funny, but either way I feel indicted.

The only agenda of the early church was to make disciples.  There was no institutional integrity to protect, no division upon division over hundreds of years to create denominations.  They were united in a way that we cannot be because of the intervening history, and yet the early believers still had difficulty dealing with change.  The rules they were clinging to gave structure and grounding to a world that was changing more quickly than they could imagine.  Maybe that is a normal, human response.  That lets me off the hook... a little bit.  

It is safe, and easy, and comfortable to continue to do things the way I have always done them.  I can do it on autopilot, without thinking and without sacrificing.  It is frightening to let go, to trust blindly.    My learning for this week: Maybe I need to let go of my structure, let go of "my" vision and try to see God's vision, God's Invitation to a New Opportunity.  Those circumcised believers were able to do it after they heard Peter out, so maybe I can.  I like how The Message puts it:

¹⁸ Hearing it all laid out like that, they quieted down. And then, as it sank in, they started praising God. “It’s really happened! God has broken through to the other nations, opened them up to Life!”

Reclaiming the Great Commission

It has been a really long time since I have written.  Not just here, anywhere.  A part of my rationalization has to do with life getting in the way.  It happens to all of us.  Issues surrounding health, family, finances, travel, injuries... the list goes on.   But when I took the time to strip away all of those excuses, I discovered that I had paralyzed myself with unrealistic expectations.  I expected perfection and a post for every sermon, and if I couldn't go back to the last post I made and start from there and comment on each week, then I wasn't going to write anything.  Instead of motivation, those expectations turned out to be a powerful anesthetic that put me into a state of inertia I feared I could not overcome.

Today I am determined to take action, so I gave myself permission to start from today.  The chain is imperfect, I have let some really good, inspirational sermons go by the wayside, but I am moving forward.

This week's sermon, based on Matthew 28:16-20 was titled Reclaiming the Great Commission.  The pastor started out by asking us how well we do what we are told to do.   Most of us snickered, including myself.  Someone telling me what to do usually guarantees that I will do the exact opposite.  In this last chapter of Matthew, though, most everyone is obedient and does what they are told.  Pilate listens to the Pharisees and high priests.  When he tells them to post their own guards at the tomb, they do it.  When they tell the guards to watch the tomb, they do it.  When the angel tells the women to deliver a message to the disciples, they do it.  When the guards report the body is gone, they are told to lie, and they do it.  Or do they?  In verse 15 it says, ^"15 So the soldiers took the money and did as they were instructed. And this story has been widely circulated among the Jews to this very day."

 The question our pastor asked was, if they all took the money and lied about what happened, then how do we know this story and circulate it to this very day?  There must have been at least one of them who leaked the story.  I wonder why?  What was his motivation?  Was he more afraid of a God that could use an earthquake and angel to show the reclamation of His Son than he was of his superiors?  Did he come to believe?  Did he think it would change the outcome?  Since it isn't reported, or even a topic of comment I can only assume that the motivation wasn't important.  It was the action that mattered.

Looking at the scripture, The Great Commission, what does Jesus tell his disciples?  All actions -  Go-Baptize-Teach.  But, He doesn't tell the disciples to go like He did, to baptize like John, to teach as Jesus did.  Jesus doesn't tell the disciples to work perfectly, without error.  Nothing in this passage describes HOW they are to work, just that they are to go, to baptize, to teach.  He just tells them to do it.

But, and this is a big but, He gives them this assurance - "I am with you always, to the very end of the age."  The implication here is that they don't have to know how to do their work, just what to do.   If they proceed, move forward, and take action, then they can trust that Jesus is with them, always and to the end of the age.  God will take care of the quality of their efforts.  I don't have to have the perfect, inspirational, life-changingly perfect post.  I just need to do it.  (I can't help it, every time I say that I see a Nike Swoosh.)  And then have faith, trust that what I do will be used for good.

Here is my story of acting and having faith (even though I didn't, not really).  I visit a friend who has days when they are largely unrepsonsive, appearing to not have any awareness of the current time, place or surroundings.  Or even that I am there or who I am.  I was reading through the service from this week, following the bulletin as faithfully as I could with no reponse at all.  Most of the time when we get to the Lord's Prayer my friend will reach out for a hand to hold and join in, but on this day there was absolutely nothing.  No glimmer of recognition.  But when we came to the scripture and got to, Therefore go..." my friend joined in and recited the remainder word for word!

This is a familiar scripture, but I don't know too many people (non-clergy) who could recite it word for word off the top of their head.  I feel that this time I got to see and feel a result of my actions.  I am almost never that lucky, but these glimpses and glimmers of the power of our God help me to remember when I get to the dark and depressing times.  We don't need to know everything, we just need to understand and do what we know we are supposed to:

 ¹⁹ Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

God's Generosity... Not Ours

A trip out of town, a nasty stomach virus, a couple of minor injuries, life...  It is amazing how quickly and thoroughly I fall behind.  On everything.  This post is from February 3!  I will do my best to catch up this week.

I think this is the final sermon on Jonah.  I am comforted that Jonah is human - petulant, pouting, longing for God to prove him right.  He has decided that the Ninevites deserve destruction and it's a safe bet that even while he was doing God's bidding, Jonah was inwardly hoping the Ninevites, his enemy, would not listen to him.  Unfortunately they took everything he said to heart.  And then God does spare them!  When Jonah goes out of town and plops himself down for a good, long pout, God creates a plant and kills it to show Jonah that he is in charge, not Jonah and God doesn't have to explain anything to Jonah.  I get the message, God is generous beyond our understanding, and he wants the best for the Ninevites of the world as much as for His recalcitrant Jonahs.  We don't get to decide when or where or how generous God will be.

One thing that bothers me about this story, though, is what happens to Jonah AFTER he does the work that God gave him?  Does he just sit outside of town pouting for the rest of his life?  Does his stubborn, unrelenting petulance make him unable to accept God's grace, putting him in the position in which he hoped to find the Ninevites?   {Sigh}  Or is it simply another mystery to be embraced?

Changing the Mind of God

This week's sermon, based on Jonah 3:1-10 continues on with Jonah choosing to obey the Lord when he gets the message a second time.  We already saw part of the story line.  God gives Jonah a task that he doesn't want to do, he tries to run away from God, fails, repents and God gives Jonah a second chance.  Hooray for second chances!  I feel pretty sure that I need more than just second chances, and bet most of us do.  But now it gets messy.  Jonah accepts God's grace and responds by doing what he was called to do - preach repentance to his people's persecutors.  And they repent!

God gives the Ninevites a second chance when they repent, which makes Jonah angry.  Wouldn't you be angry?  How many times have I heard my kids cry, "Uh!  Not fair!" or even said it myself?  Or thought it?  The answer is: too many to count.  It seems to me that our society has confused equality and fairness, vengeance and justice.  Thinking about this as a parent, at any given point in time you give to each child as they need.  That doesn't mean you treat them equally at every given point in time, but you do treat them fairly.  The more we become obsessed with personal control, the more we demand our own definitions be used in proscribing behavior, consequences, justice... the more unfair and unjust everything becomes, and the more we feel the victim.

I did a little (very little) research on the question of what is the difference between vengeance and justice?  The general consensus seems to be that it all comes down to perspective.   If, in the example above, you are the recipient then it all feels fair and just.  If you are not, it feels unfair, prejudiced.  Jonah felt God was being unfair in saving those vicious, blood-thirsty, evil, persecuting Assyrians.  And he told God so!  In fact, that is the main reason he ran away in the first place, because he knew God would be merciful to his enemies!

It is hard to give up control, to trust that God will take care of it, and to believe that your enemy deserves mercy.  And yet, that was the lesson Jonah had to learn.  Recently, when I was talking with my Dad about my brother's death, I told him that I believed that whatever happened to my brother was in God's hands.  I don't get to decide and I also don't get to know - until much later - how this all turns out.  And I am good with that.  It was difficult to arrive at the understanding, but then easy to say when working through such a big, overwhelming event.  I think it is  harder to live out in the day to day minutia.  Maybe that idiot  person who cut me off in traffic deserves a second chance...

 What this passage tells me about God is that God is merciful in God's own unknowable, mysterious ways.  God decides who gets a second chance, and when they get it.  What it says to me, today, is that God was, is, and will be in control of things, and I just need to get over myself, accept that, and move on.

Jonah

All over the Bible, people are getting up and going. Abraham and Sarah move out on a promise and a prayer. Moses heads for Egypt with nothing but a shepherd's crook and Aaron to write his sermons. Elijah stands defiant, facing four hundred and fifty Baal prophets. But not Jonah. Jonah stands on the dock with tickets for Tarshish. 

So what's the problem?  Why would Jonah defy God's call and literally travel in the opposite direction?  Well, the problem is Nineveh.  Nineveh was the Assyrian capital and the Assyrians were brutal conquerors.  In the eighth and seventh centuries B.C., they plundered Palestine looting and burning its cities and deporting its inhabitants. The Northern Kingdom of Israel actually ceased to exist as a result of the Assyrian conquest.

If I were to put this in more modern terms; it would be the same as asking an African-American to go preach to the Ku Klux Klan....Go to very heart of the people who have maliciously persecuted you and your people and bring them the word of God. 

 

"Go to Nineveh," says God. And Jonah says, "Anywhere, Lord; anywhere but Nineveh." So Jonah stands on the dock with tickets for Tarshish.  And who can blame him? But God puts things in perspective and reminds Jonah that God is the reason he needs to go to Nineveh, God is the reason there was a big storm that was tearing the ship apart, God is the reason he got thrown overboard, God is the reason why a big fish came along to swallow him up and give him a second chance. 

 

So many times God calls us to uncomfortable places.  And too many times we choose to board a ship for Tarsish and then find ourselves in the belly of a big fish. We want to control where we go and what we do so that we can maintain some sense of control or some sense of the known because life can be really challenging. 

 

But we need to remember that God’s call can be both a word of Grace and a word of challenge.  Jonah did everything to push God away out of his life.  And God never gave up on him.  That is grace!  God sent a big fish, not to punish but to provide an opportunity for a second chance.  That is grace.  God is saying: I am still with you.  You can run away from my call but you cannot run away from me.   

 

God never lets up and never gives up on us. Grace and challenge, forgiveness and responsibility are always intertwined.

The Revelation of Baptism

The more I think about this scripture, Luke 3:15-22, the more confused and convoluted what I want to say becomes.  There are so many ways to look at it, think about it, and even question it.  The more I read and consider, the more I question and the more muddled my thoughts get.

What does baptism reveal?  John's baptism of water is a revelation in and of itself.  It is an open invitation in a society built on rules about who can do what, and when and where they can do it.  You may not have been allowed in the temple, but everyone was allowed in the river.  You may have faced restrictions about where you could live, but everyone was allowed in the wilderness.  You may have been a woman... you get the idea.  The way John did business revealed something about the nature of God.  It has nothing to do with what any of the people he is baptizing have done.  It has everything to do with accepting the open invitation, available to literally everyone, and committing to relationship with God.

John's baptism of Jesus reveals Jesus as fully human, fully God, and the fulfillment of prophecy.  Rather than turning away from sin, though, this baptism is a beginning, the beginning of Jesus' ministry. It was a forward-looking act, but it seems to me not a jettisoning the past. 

Maybe this is the point where I am getting hung up. We tend to think of baptism as an end to our sinful ways, and John preaches a baptism of repentance.  But, just what does repentance mean?  Is it only the admission and contrition or sorrow one feels for past sin, or does it also carry an implied commitment to doing better?  To being perfect?   If we follow the example of Christ, then isn't that what our own baptism represents?  I sure hope not, or else I am in deep trouble.  No way I am ever approaching perfect. 

Maybe I need to think of baptism as the start of the faith journey.  Instead of primarily turning away from sin, baptism is primarily about turning toward God.  As in any journey there will be bumps in the road.  Living out our baptismal vows is a work in progress, a process, not the product of an event.  And even though we are imperfect, will stumble, and sometimes take a wrong turn, we are still the recipients of God's grace and forgiveness.

I have to confess that I am happy to reconcile myself with the Wesleyan idea of prevenient grace - a grace that works around us, in us, and through us, even when we are unable or choose not to see and feel it.  Always.  I think that is the best revelation of baptism.